


The Sun Shines on You

by Charliisgay2020



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Angst, Happy Ending, Loki (Marvel) Gets a Hug, Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, Loki (Marvel)'s Lips Sewn Shut, M/M, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Torture, Rape Aftermath, Thor (Marvel) is a Good Bro, Tony Stark Is a Good Bro, Torture, Whipping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-24
Updated: 2020-11-29
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:40:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 40
Words: 45,991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24895552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Charliisgay2020/pseuds/Charliisgay2020
Summary: What, if Loki wasn’t responsible for the battle of new, york, what if he wasn’t even there, but in the clutches of Thanos, what if he thinks he was there, what if Odin and thor had always loved Loki, what if he knew his origins from the beginning, what if he was made to believe that he was unloved unwanted, what if everything he went through were just pictures put into his head, what if he breaks at the hands of Thanos, what if he has had enough fun, what if?
Relationships: Loki/Tony Stark
Comments: 162
Kudos: 349





	1. a new friend

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first work, I welcome constructive criticism, so please tell me what I can adjust in the comments

The whip struck Loki’s marred back again and again for what seemed like forever. He didn’t make a sound. He never did anymore. They wanted him to scream and beg for them to stop as he had for a long time. 

His mind had been their favorite form of torture since the start. They loved to turn his thoughts on him and plant things there that didn’t belong. Visions of his family hating him. Of him attacking Midgard. Of him betraying Thor. His father hating him. And his brother grew to dislike him as well. After so long of this repeated maybe it started to work. He could no longer remember how his father really was. Maybe he was the person these people thought him to be. He had even seen Asgards fall. Multiple times.

They played with his mind for long periods of time. Then if he stopped reacting to those tortures they would toy with his body. They would take turns burning him. Whipping him. crushing limbs underthings. calling him down to the dirt. Slamming his body into walls. Beating him with random objects. And defiling him. Violating him. Rarely feeding or bathing him.

His magic had long run out trying to mend his mind and body. To keep him at least sane. This had been easy at the beginning with his nearly endless magic reserve. But less than a year into his time here. It had run shallow. Leaving him in a weak. Vulnerable state.

He had cried for Thor to rescue him. For Odin to forgive him for whatever he had done. For his mother. Or his small group of friends. Even for his biological parents. For anyone to save him from this hell. Then he had gone silent. Not making any noise. Never crying. Never begging. Never screaming. He chose to recede to the dark recesses of his mind and block out the world. 

\---------

One dark day the god was hauled out of his dark damp cell. Through the halls and into an enormous room.

He was forced to his knees before Thanos and the Other. He bowed his head as he was made to do in the presence of the mighty beings.

A deep growl came from the giant titan. And his throne creaked as he stood. Slowly he drifted to where he kneeled. He grabbed him by the chin forcefully and snapped his head up to meet his eyes.

Loki remained silent looking down again using only his eyes. 

“You have been a stubborn toy to break. But it seems you’ve broken too much for our use. I have no use for you so am releasing you. Before that. I must have fun one last time.” bellowed the deep voice.

Loki was dragged to a post in the middle of the room. This one similar to the one in his cell. He was chained to the post. Slumped forward his too-thin chest shaking slightly. From weakness. In a way the starvation had been a large factor in his magic running out.

Before he even knew the mad titan was behind him he felt the whip rip into his back. Reopening unhealed and infected wounds. Blood poured down his back. But again he never made a single peep. Never moving unless by the force of the whip. 

An unknown amount of time passed and the whip was dropped to the ground with a harsh thud.

He was unchained; he lay in the same spot. Arms at his side. Not bothering to move. Not until he was lifted into the air via a large hand wrapped around his neck. It was causing him to start wheezing. And not being able to get air to his lungs.

When he was about to pass out Thanos finally released him he was thrown to the floor.

“If you won’t speak for us you won’t speak to anyone.” Thanos’ voice said as he returned to his field of vision now carrying a needle and thick thread leaning over him and grabbing his face holding his mouth shut. 

His silence had almost stopped at the pain produced by the thread being pulled through his lips. Only his will to be set free stopping him. Soon enough his mouth was pulled shut for however long he was left without care.

He closed his eyes. Blocking out whatever Thanos was saying. Only for them to snap open at the pressure of shifting through space. The last thing he could recall was slamming into a sandy wasteland. Catching a glimpse of the small town nearby. Before his vision faded to black.

\--------

The next time he came to. He let out a small groan as he was flipped onto his mauled back. His arms pinned under him linked together with metal bands looped together.

There was a group of people around him. All dressed in black with sunglasses on. None spoke. But looked very serious. None seemed to have particularly good intent.

A taller man with black hair and light skin along with a slightly shorter blond-haired man grabbed his shoulder and dragged him into a standing position. Only for him to collapse again. His legs are too weak from lack of use and muscle deterioration.

A man approached him. This one was older looking with short graying hair. He was wearing a tuxedo. He didn’t wear the black glasses and the light brought his blue eyes out in a beautiful way. 

“We are to bring him into the shield base. You two will clean him up. Get him some medical attention. And find out if he possesses a threat. I doubt he will be. But with the attack’s on earth we can’t be too careful.” the man said smoothly to the agents holding Loki up. 

Roughly they grab him under his arms and drag him into a small odd-shaped contraption similar to the planes on Asgard. Pushing him into his seat. Then standing at his side. Not saying anything. 

His mouth hurt in a way he had never felt before. He could feel his blood leaking out of his mouth and into his mouth. He could hardly breathe let alone swallow properly without pain. 

Leaning his head back he closed his eyes as two more people boarded the strange metal contraption that closed behind them. It then started vibrating. Panic set in as the box lifted from the ground.

He started to try to stand to try to escape. Grabbing the man to his right and hauled himself up shaking profusely. He was almost standing when he felt something hard hit him in the back of the head knocking him to the floor. He was hit again. And his vision swam before fading to black.


	2. Foul play

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki is questioned by the agents from before. Tony gets a call from S.H.I.E.L.D.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2nd chapter, Yay! hopefully, this is well done. if you do see any mistakes or things to add, let me know, I really want to improve. Basically, before I start the chapter I want you guys to know, that I got the idea for the psychological torture from the hunger games with Peeta's view of things being changed by the capital.

When Loki opened his eyes he was in a small gray room. The only things in the room were a small gray table. Two chairs. And a mirror. His arms were still chained behind his back. He was laying on the ground in between the farthest wall and the door. Just thrown on the ground. 

His stomach growled lowly for a minute reminding him of his constant hunger. Although he was used to it by now. He was rarely fed while in Thanos’ clutches. He had learned to ignore the cramps and pains. Being a god he couldn’t die of hunger but could feel the effects. 

Rolling onto his back he used his weak legs to push himself to the corner. Knowing he had no chance of escape in his current state. Deciding to curl up there instead. Closing his eyes and prepared to perhaps sleep. His rest was interrupted when a bang rang through the room hurting his ears and causing him to flinch.

Heavy footsteps got closer to where he lay. Loki looked up recognizing the two people as the men from on the aircraft.

They reached down each taking an arm and dragging him to his feet. Preceding to slam him into the stone wall behind him a grunt released from his sewn mouth. His head slamming and bouncing into the wall with a sickening crack.

He was held up by the men with graying hair. Who now leaned in. There was venom practically dripping from his mouth as he spoke to Loki. “We’re gonna play a game. Okay? We’re going to ask you a yes or no question if you answer and we believe you. You get to get one injury healed by one of us. If we don’t believe you. You get punished. In any way we deem fit. We will play this game until we run out of questions or you give up on us.” 

The man’s voice was soft but it sent shivers up Loki’s spine. Honestly he was used to games. He could do this. He’ll just have to play along. He could maybe even benefit from it.

The man was breathing into his ear at this point when he slowly said “Do you understand?” 

When this got no answer he slammed Loki into the wall again then repeated “Do you understand?” this time receiving a small nod.

“Good. Let’s begin. Shall we?” the tall man said as he leaned back. A sinister smile plastered on his near-flawless face.

Both men dropped him causing Loki to drop to the ground tearing open the scabs that had only recently formed. A pained whimper left Loki’s mouth when he hit the ground.

“Question one. Do you have poor intentions toward this planet?” the blond-haired man asked. Peering at him with sharp gray eyes.

Loki shook his head. No. He had no bad intentions towards these mortals.

“I don’t believe you. considering that all the people from other worlds have come to take over or destroy Earth.” 

Loki shook his head again trying to get his point across that he wasn’t here to destroy Earth. He could explain himself if he could talk. That was his best weapon. Being able to talk himself out of just about any situation.

Both men approached the bound god. Grabbing him again and hauling him up. Then grab a chair forcing him to sit in it. His hands that were still bound behind him. Now behind the back of the chair.

The two leave for just a moment returning with a large box. Laying it in the corner of the room furthest from where he had been placed.

The man grabs a long thin black stick. 

“Ever see one of these?” the tall man said raising an eyebrow.

Loki shook his head no. Maybe similar had been used on him with the mad titan but he could never see what he was being tortured with.

“Well. This is a baton. For your first punishment. You will receive 25 hits with it. Wherever we decide to. As time goes on the punishments will get worse.” the man said bouncing the baton up and down in his hand lightly.

The man approaches Loki with a sneer on his face. He then brought the weapon up above his head. Swinging it down hard into Loki’s already broken ribs. Forcing his air from his lungs.

The men took turns hitting him wherever they wanted. His torso. Legs. His head. By the time they were done Loki was crying and trying to get enough breath through his nose to breathe.

The blonde man placed the baton back in the box then calmly returning to his partner.

“Next question” the man spoke. “are you from Asgard?” 

A pit formed in Loki’s stomach as the truth of his situation came to light. He wasn’t going to be helped because these people weren’t going to believe anything he said. They wanted to hurt him. Why he didn’t know. But this was revenge. For something he may have been forced to do. Maybe he hadn’t even done it. His memories having been changed during his torture. 

\----------------  
2 weeks later

To say Tony was confused to get a call from Agent Coulson would be an understatement. He had been working in his lab when around 4:27 Jarvis informed him that he had a call from S.H.I.E.L.D and that it was urgent (it always was with them.).

So. Of course. He answered it. Since he wanted to keep his job.

“Hello. This is Tony Stark.” he says. If it was Fury he probably would have left it to go to voicemail just because he likes messing with him.

“Tony. Agent Coulson. I know this is short notice. I need you to come to the helicarrier. I’m sending you the coordinates. Now. We need you to take over a case. I know this is unusual for us to call you. But everyone else has their own mission and the agents on the case aren’t getting anywhere with it.” Coulson said stress was evident in his voice.

Tony was now intrigued. He’d spoken to prisoners before. Gotten them to spill their guts. He could do it again. 

The coordinates came up on the screen in front of him. Less than an hour’s flight. Since he was in his malibu house at the moment. 

“Sure why not. I can be there in less than an hour. That's by flight in the suit.” Tony says as he shuts off the power to the lab making his way to where his suits were located. They were not too far away.

“We want you here as soon as possible. We don’t know if he has people working with him to attack us. The sooner we get an answer. The sooner we can lower our guard or prepare for an attack.” Coulson said seriously. 

He definitely wasn’t messing around. Tony couldn’t blame him for being cautious. What. With all the aliens attacking recently.

“I’ll be there as soon as possible. I’ll be leaving in two minutes.” Tony said to the agent. Ending the call. 

He called his suit to him. The metal formed around his body. The displays turned on. Then he made his way upstairs to the balcony. Proceeding to turn on his blasters rocketing into the sky. Towards the location of the helicarrier.


	3. A watchfull eye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony watches how Loki's abusers are interrogating him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's twelve here but I can't sleep so here's the next chapter, I'm hoping to post every Monday and Thursday. I hope you enjoy this chapter.

When Tony landed on the helicarrier he was greeted by a calm looking Agent Coulson. He had seemed much more stressed over the phone.

For Tony. It had been a relaxing flight after he let Jarvis take over. Letting him just watch as everything zoomed by.

The helicarrier wasn’t too busy. Most agents being out on their own missions. 

“Welcome aboard. Thank you for getting here on such short notice.” Coulson says. As he approaches Tony. 

“I’ve had shorter. Ever had to fly across the world to protect a city that is currently being attacked.” Tony said a hint of amusement in his voice. 

A chuckle escaped Coulson. Who then went back to being serious.

“So. What or who am I here to interview?” Tony asked. He wanted to get out of here as soon as possible. He had places and things he’d much rather be doing right now. He never felt much when interrogating criminals anyway.

“The person you’re with today hasn’t given a name. The two agents tell me they won’t say anything even after two weeks of questioning. They’ve been in that room since they got here.” Coulson says opening a file.

“We found them nearly dead in the desert in New Mexico. I ordered Agent Smith and Agent Williams to get them medical attention on return here.” Coulson recited reading from the file.

Tony knew the two agents he spoke of. They both suffered the loss of family members from the invasions. They had always been ruthless in their tactics. And a lot of their methods he didn’t agree with.

To Tony. This didn’t look good at all. Who knew the state he was going to find the poor person in.

“These are some of my best men and they have yet to get anything out of this guy. This guy must be very loyal to whomever they are working for.” the man said looking Tony in the eye.

“I know they’ll do just about anything to get information out of someone. Which you know I don’t agree with.” Tony says. A hint of anger in the last part.

“Well. What room is he in and what floor.`” Tony says with a sigh. Might as well get it over with.

“Floor 4 room 34. Have fun. Oh and if you need anything you can come up and get it. You have access to most things.” Coulson said. Only looking up briefly.

“Oh and Tony they don’t know they are losing the case so don’t just walk in. I’m calling them up in ten minutes.” Coulson finished 

Tony nodded then turned swiftly on his heel in the direction of the stairs.

\-------------

The two agents were already in the room when Tony got there.

He had wanted to see how they were questioning the man. So he went to the room where you could see into the room and hear what they were saying.

He didn’t expect what he saw when he walked into the room. The two agents had a badly beaten man held up against the wall furthest from him.

“You refuse to answer our question honestly. I’m getting sick of it. We’ve been at this for two weeks.” the taller graying Agent Williams said venom dripping from his mouth

There was a grunt from the man as he was slammed into the wall. Williams held him up by the collar. The man seemed weak. His legs buckling under his weight. Even when most of it was being supported. 

The man couldn’t be much of a threat

The man didn’t speak though and it was only then that Tony saw the stitches holding the man’s mouth closed. Upon seeing them the truth dawned on him why the man hadn’t told them anything. 

These agents hadn’t given the man any medical attention. As told. They were torturing him. The thought of it made Tony’s stomach churn in rage.

When Smith moved to haul out one of the chairs Williams dropped the man. He couldn’t even catch himself with his arms chained behind his back.

The crack of him hitting the floor made Tony wince.

Once the chair was out they lifted the man to it flipping him around and shoving him into it making the chair tip dangerously.

But the sight of the guys back made Tony go pale. It was drenched with blood. His back looked worse than his face that was also covered in a thick layer of blood.

The P.A system goes off at that moment calling the two agents in front of him and for a second the bound man relaxes looking down.

Tony turns to the door but looks back when he hears an angry yell seeing Williams kick the chair down. The man sitting in it falling back and smashing his head into the floor. The agents then leave. Just leaving the man on the floor with his arms pinned under him. 

For the first time since he went into the small room. He noticed just how small the man was. Not height wise. Height wise he seemed very tall. He was skinny. His clothes were hanging off him. He obviously was starving. And probably hadn’t been fed since his arrival here.

The man lay there. Just breathing. He looked exhausted. Like he hadn’t slept in forever. Maybe he hadn’t. Tony knows what that’s like. Sleep never came to him easily since his time in that cave. When he did he was plagued with horribly vivid nightmares.

He quietly exited the room. Looking to make sure the agents had gone.

He then made his way to his usual room in the ship. It held just a simple bed. And desk. He had wanted to grab a blanket for the man. He knew from experience that helping the person persuaded them to help you.

He knew the man would help him. It was likely that he hadn’t had a single say in what had happened to him. Who knew. Beyond him. What had really happened to him.

He also grabbed a shirt. A pair of pants. And some underclothes. He didn’t know this man. He knew he didn’t deserve what he was being put through. Maybe a fresh set of clothes may also help the man trust Tony.

As he left the room he spotted a pen and notepad on the desk. He didn’t know how helpful it would be but he took it anyway.

He started to head back to the room. Grabbing a cloth and bowl of water to clean up the man’s face. Along with a set of keys to the handcuffs. 

He didn’t know why he was doing this for a man he didn’t even know. For some reason. He felt that he needed to give this man a break. That he needed to help him in any way he needed him to.

Maybe it was because he had been in the same position before. Maybe it was just his personality. A part of him felt drawn to the beaten man in that room.

Who knew what he had been through before this. Clearly he needed help. Not people that were going to beat him down further than he already was. 

Having been lost in his thoughts he hadn’t realized that he had arrived until his hand landed on the door handle. With a deep breath. He pushed the door open ready to face the music.


	4. A helpful hand

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony meets the mysterious man on the other side of the glass.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know if ill have two chapters ready for next week, I have one for Monday but I'm going out of town for four days, I may not get the time to write and edit a chapter, I will try to have three for the next week to make up for it. I hope you enjoy this chapter if you see anything that's not well written or should be changed let me know

Tony made sure to open the door gently as to not startle the man any more than he likely already was. He made sure to take the same care closing the door.

He moved slowly aware that the other man was watching and tracking his movements.

The man had managed to wiggle out from under the chair and was now sitting with his back to the wall. He was sitting up back bent to make himself as small and unthreatening as possible.

Tony gently placed the items on the table neatly. Leaving his hands free to defend himself if he needed to. He hoped he didn’t. He didn’t know how much more the guy could take.

Tony grabbed the keys to the cuffs turning and looking at the man on the floor. Immediately he looked down. Shrinking down even further.

Tony slowly took a step forward and the man’s head snapped up. Fear shining bright in his green eyes. Visibly tense.

Being this close. Tony noticed that the man was just skin and bones. He was sure that if it weren’t for the baggy shirt he would be able to count his ribs without any issues. 

When he started to make a second step forward. The man tried to scramble back. Not getting anywhere but hitting his back against the wall behind him. This caused him to wince in pain.

“Hey. Hey. It's okay. My name is Tony. I promise that I’m not here to hurt you. I only want to help you. But I need to get closer to do that.” Tony says softly holding his hands up in a sign of surrender and wanting peace.

He knew the man wasn’t going to believe him. No matter how true the statement was. Because considering the state he was in. He probably wouldn’t be trusting easily for a long time. If he's anything like Tony he may have never had an easy time trusting new people.

“It’s okay. I just want to take off the cuffs. can I do that? Just nod or shake your head” Tony asks softly. Wanting to make sure he tells him exactly what he wants to do. Not making any sudden movements. As well as how to help Tony understand what he needs.

The man took a deep breath in and slowly nodded.

A small smile spread across Tony’s face at this. The man had courage. He knows if someone from the Ten rings tried to help him. To be perfectly honest. He wouldn’t have let them anywhere near him.

As Tony inches closer he kept his hands in the man's sight.

“I need to get behind you bud. Can I help you move out just a little.” Tony asks. Hoping the man will nod. Although he wouldn’t be surprised if he didn’t. Since Tony was the one taking him out of his safe zone.

Tony waits for a moment watching as the man struggles with himself whether or not to move out but eventually nods again.

“Awesome. I know this is hard and that you're scared and probably don’t know where you are. I’m not like the people here before I have no interest in hurting you. You’re doing amazing. Okay?” Tony praised and tried to instill what he said before. What he had wanted to hear when he returned.

When he received a small nod he moved in and the man moved forward giving Tony room to reach the cuffs.

He lightly took hold of the man's wrist half afraid that it would break if he used too much force. He overlooked that and slipped the key in. The cuffs must have been too tight because for a second the key got jammed and wouldn’t let go when it did. Tony saw that his wrist was rubbed raw and the area around where the cuffs were. Badly bruised. At this waves of anger washes over him.

Once both arms were free Tony moved back so the man could see him fully. 

Tony briefly wondered if he should clean his face first or get his name. He wanted to stop calling him ‘buddy’ or ‘the man’. But he also knew he should clean him up in case he had an infection. 

“Okay bud. You’re doing amazing. I’m gonna walk over to that table than I’m going to get the notebook and pen. Along with that bowl and towel. Then I’m going to walk back over to you. Is that okay?” Tony softly asked. Kneeling in front of the man pointing to each item he spoke of.

The man looked into his eyes. Tears shining in them. His vibrant green eyes scanning his hazel. Looking for any hint of malice. Finding none he looked down nodding again.

Tony walked over to the table grabbing the pen and pad and placed them in his pocket. He then picked up the bowl of water and hand cloth.

He made his way back across the room still very aware of those green eyes following his every move.

He kneeled down in front of the man again placing the water on the ground lightly. Then pulling the pen and pad out.

“Okay. Look. I know that you’ve probably been asked enough questions to last a lifetime. But I need to ask you one more. Is that alright?” Tony asked. Immediately regretting it when he saw the man’s chest rising a falling at a too fast pace

“Hey. Look at me. Good. Nothing is going to happen to you if you don’t answer the question. No punishment. Nothing.” Tony said firmly but not unkindly. 

He watched as the person in front of him started to slow his breath.

“Good job. Here take this. Okay here’s the question. What is your name?” Tony asked while handing the pen and pad to the man across from him. Watching as he took them shakily. Gripping the pen as if he’d never held something like it in his life. 

The guy was shaking like a leaf trying to hold the pen. Tears welling up in his eyes as he tried to write his name on the paper. The pen moved jerkily and tightly. Who knew how long it had actually been since he held something so simple as a pen and pad.

Once finished he handed the paper and pen back to Tony. Looking back down at his lap. 

Tony looked down at the poorly written letters. Tony didn’t have too much trouble deciphering the word. Knowing what it’s like to have poor handwriting from before he was famous and didn’t have to sign things for people.

“Loki?” Tony asked looking up and raising an eyebrow. The man. Loki apparently nodded his head.

Tony knew that name. He couldn’t put his finger on it. But he definitely knew that name. 

Then it dawned him. Like a light turning on he realized. Loki. Thor’s supposedly dead brother. The brother who had been kidnapped out of his room during the night never to be seen again. And declared dead something like eight years ago.

Thor had told him of how distraught his family had been. Their eldest Hela had been distraught for years. Even refusing to stop searching. Odin and Frigga were never quite the same. Even though Tony never met him he heard lots of stories of the beasts Thor Loki and Hela had slain. The fun they had. How even after Loki met his real parents. He always loved his adopted family but had gone to see his biological parents. 

As the thoughts came to a halt and before he could stop himself or think he asked “Loki. As in Thor’s brother Loki?”


	5. A helpful hand pt 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tony continues to help Loki in whatever ways he can while forming a plan in his head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just got back early from my trip so with any luck I'll have the next chapter ready for Thursday. thanks for the comments and kudos, and I'm glad you guys enjoying the story.

Loki flinched violently. The truth of those words setting in if Tony knew who his brother was. He knew what he had done. 

He scrambled away into the corner. Tony would be just like the others soon enough. If he could prolong the enviable and get away for a short while.

His back hit the wall far too soon for his liking and worse he was trapped. He was an easy target and being weak as he was at the moment he wouldn’t be able to defend himself.

He had already made multiple mistakes. He wasn’t supposed to look into the eyes of people. He had paused when Tony asked him a question. Had let himself make a choice that Tony may not have wanted him to. With Thanos those warranted punishments.

Tony stood from his spot slowly. Worried.

“It’s okay. It Okay. I’m not going to hurt you.” Tony says. Putting his hands in front of himself.

Loki wanted to believe him. He couldn’t sense a lie. With his magic being almost depleted he didn’t know if he could trust himself.

He so wanted to trust Tony. He had yet to hurt him in any way. Any time he trusted he always got hurt.

Tony remained standing with his hands up. He wasn’t holding a weapon. That didn’t mean he didn’t want to hurt him.

“Look I don’t care what you’ve done. Or who you’re related to or not related to. I’m here to clean you up and get you medical attention.” Tony said. Bending down to grab the bowl that had been next to him.

Loki’s heart was racing as he watched Tony slowly get closer. Loki curled in on himself once the shorter man was in front of him looking down at him with hazel eyes.

“I just want to clean up your face. This is only water. And a cloth.” Tony said holding each item in his hand in front of Loki. 

“Can I just clean you up? Then I have a fresh set of clothes on that table. I can help you into them. We can go from there.” Tony said. Finally telling Loki his plan.

Loki nodded his head as he was supposed to. If it was what Tony wanted to do it he would. As he should. The man shouldn’t even have to be in his presence. Let alone be treating him with kindness.

He was snapped from his thought by a finger under his chin gently guiding his head up. He felt the damp cloth running over his face. He had to fight the urge to lean into the gentle touch.

Slowly and carefully Tony washed Loki’s face. Grimacing at the stitches and bruised face from the beatings. 

The second worst for Tony was when he started to clean Loki’s neck. It was bruised badly in the shape of a huge handprint. He was half surprised that the man’s windpipe wasn’t crushed.

Once done Loki looked a thousand times better. He was still badly bruised but you could see his skin. Wasn’t covered in old and new blood.

“Awesome job big guy. You’re doing amazing. Just a few more little things to do okay?” Tony praised. Smiling when Loki nodded okay for him to continue. 

“I’m just going to get the last few items from the table then I will be right back.” Tony says gently. Then standing.

Loki watched him intently. Eyes frantically darting from side to side occasionally. Then going back to where Tony was.

He watched as Tony picked up the cloths. And the blanket each folded neatly and stacked atop one another.

He turned back to Loki who immediately looked down into his lap.

In Tony’s head if whatever happened to him hadn’t happened he could’ve been good friends with the guy. Maybe even more than that. He couldn’t dwell on that thought at the moment. Since he had more important things to think about.

“I know that you can’t walk right now. Which I’m going to assist in later but you need to change out of that. I can stay and look away if you want or I can go and come back in ten. Write down what you want me to do.” Tony says. Handing Loki the pen and pad again.

He waited patiently as Loki wrote his answer. Right now he had all the time in the world.

Tony hoped Loki would want him to stay. The guy was so weak and he wanted to be there to help him.

Soon enough Loki handed back the book and pen while looking down. Still refusing to look Tony in the eye.

The note read to stay in slightly neater writing as if he had adjusted to the pen again. Like riding a bike.

“Alright I’ll turn so I can’t see you if you need help tap on the floor twice.” Tony says as he turns around facing the door.

Tony heard shuffling behind him as Loki took off his soiled clothes.

Loki briefly caught himself in the mirror. He missed his long hair. Thanos had made sure to take everything that made him. Him away from him. He had been resilient but was now weak. He had been strong but now couldn’t even walk. He made himself sick if he were honest with himself. 

With a small sigh. He looked away and down at himself then at the clothes next to him. He couldn’t remember the last time anyone treated him with such kindness. Such generosity.

He started to change and as he went about changing he noticed tears falling down his face. They weren’t tears of sadness but tears of the gratitude he felt at this moment.

As he changed the sadness crept in as he took off the pants and undergarments. Remembering every time it was done to him before they violated him. Every time it happened. It chipped away at his soul. At his self worth. And his want to keep going.

He shuffled into the pants and fresh underclothes. He looked down at the pants. Hesitantly running a hand over the soft fabric. It was just his shirt now. It was going to be the most challenging part because he could feel how it was stuck to his back.

He attempted to gently take the shirt off but ended having to rip it off his back. Also ripping open the partly healed flesh.

He slipped the shirt on. It felt loose on him but he liked how soft the shirt was.

He could feel the blood pouring down his back but paid it no mind.

He tapped the floor. And Tony turned back around grinning at him.

“I’m going to take you back to my tower today. You’ll get better with my team there. Then you can do what you want. For now. You stay here. Do what you want while I pick up a couple of things. And talk to someone.” Tony said as he draped the blanket over Loki’s shoulders. Smiling when he clutched the blanket tightly. His eyes drifting shut for just a moment. He knew he wouldn’t sleep. He had to keep both eyes open to protect himself.


	6. A talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony forms a plan, and talks to Coulson.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got back a day early so I had enough time to write this chapter.

Tony shut the door gently. Heaving a sigh of relief. He had a plan at least. He just had to get Coulson to agree to it.

Loki wasn’t safe here. It also wasn’t good for his mind to be in the same place he was tortured. Tony knew he wouldn’t be able to control himself if he saw Williams. Or Smith. 

He needed to get a plane back. He knew that. He didn’t know how Loki would react to being in one. Who knew what his least interaction in any type of vehicle had been.

He also wanted to get as much footage from the interrogation room as possible. He needed to know just what they were doing to the broken man in the room. How they hurt him. What he looked like when he was brought in.

He knew he would have to talk to Coulson. But he really didn’t want to get too close to the two agents that helped in the torture of the man in that room. Because he didn’t know if he’d be able to control himself.

Tony knew that he had made his fair share of mistakes. With his past and being an arms dealer and all. But this was going too far.

Seeing Loki. Thor’s brother had been a huge shock. Considering he was supposed to be dead and all. Tony also knew he could use magic and shapeshift. He knows he could be a threat but that look in his eye was real genuine fear and pain. The man couldn’t even stand. Let alone go about committing war crimes.

So Tony had to be careful. He had to have a set plan for if the guy decided he was going to try and take over earth. Which he found to be highly unlikely. Even so he would have to make a special cell. To hold the god. Like one that he would never be able to escape without Tony permitting it.

Tony also wanted the man to be comfortable. So he would need to clear out a spare room to hold him so he had a safe place to go to if he needed it. He would have to ask Pepper for help. He couldn’t do it all himself.

He would also need to talk to Coulson. Since he would need a jet to the tower. But he would need to get Loki off the jet with as little stress as possible. For him or Loki.

Then he had the issue of telling Thor. Tony knew how heartbroken the man had been for a long time after he learned of Loki’s death. But he also didn’t want to overwhelm Loki. 

If Tony was honest with himself he would have wondered what he liked so much about the man that he didn’t even know. Maybe it was because he knew Thor and wanted him to be happy. Maybe it was because he had been through some of what Loki has been through. He didn’t know it was just a gut feeling.

With a heavy breath. Tony pressed on making his way to the main floor. He WOULD take Loki to his tower. Because he knew it would be horrible for the man’s mind to stay here. 

Once he was at the correct floor he realized that Coulson could be talking to the two assholes that did this. God he wanted to kill them. How could someone do that to another living thing? Already half-dead at that.

He could feel that red hot rage burning through him. He had already disliked the two ruthless men. He always disagreed with their tactics. The people they interrogated almost always ended up more traumatized than they were before.

Once he arrived he saw Coulson was standing alone. This was exactly what he wanted and how he wanted it. He wouldn’t be allowed to be an avenger if he killed the two agents.

“Hello. Stark.” Coulson said as he saw him approaching him.

“Hey. I need something from you.” Tony says wringing his hands together.

“What do you need?” Coulson sighed. Rubbing his hands down his face.

“Well. I need the camera footage for that room. And on the vehicle you took to get here.” he said. “I’m also going to need a jet back to my tower. I’m taking him with me. I have seen what they were doing to him. He can't stay here. It would only make things worse for him.” Tony stated firmly. He wasn’t messing around.

“I can give you the camera footage. Do you think he could be a threat?” Coulson asked. Only to receive a shake of the head 

“Well if I let you take him back I need weekly reports on his behavior. His health. And any information he gives you.” Coulson says.

“I can do that. By the way. His name is Loki. He’s from Asgard. And he is Thor's adopted brother. He was supposed to be dead. But he’s clearly been being tortured by whoever had him. Maybe if you taught your agents to be gentle sometimes it would be easier to get information.” Tony spat in annoyance. The hatred he felt for the agents was very clear. 

Coulson at least looked down in what looked to be something like shame. At least he understood that what was going on was wrong and that the man didn’t deserve what he was being put through.

With a small sigh. Coulson turned to the console and gave Tony access to the files and downloaded them onto a hard- drive and handed it to him.

“The jet will be ready when you get there. Take your time if you need anything in the future from us. Or Loki needs anything just contact us.” Coulson said after Tony snatched the drive away.

Tony nodded before marching out of the room. This was so wrong in so many ways. It made him sick to think about.

He would watch the drive when he got to the tower. Right now he had to get back to Loki. With the two agents still on the carrier he couldn’t be left alone. 

Tony also knew he had to calm down. He couldn’t just storm into the room and scare Loki more than he already was. Thor told him himself that Loki was really good at detecting emotions. 

As Tony strode back to the interrogation room he practiced the breathing method Bruce had used when trying to avoid transforming.

He could feel his anger lessening with each time he breathed in. He could feel himself relaxing and calming. Soon he had complete control over himself and he reached the door. Taking one last breath. Knocking gently and pushing the door open.


	7. prep time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tony Prepares Loki for take-off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so I'm going to do updates on Sundays and Wednesdays know just because to easier for me to do, hope yall enjoy the chapter.

Loki jolted up at the sound of a knock. The blanket shifting around his curled form. It wasn’t even loud. It still spooked him.

He watched with wide eyes as the door slowly opened and the man from earlier came in. He couldn’t remember his name for some reason. Maybe his mind was more broken than he had originally thought.

“Hey. Bud. We’re good to go.” Tony said as he walked into the room slowly closing the door behind him. 

Loki looked down again. He wanted to leave this room. But at the same time he didn’t want to. This was his safe place. Even though it really wasn’t that safe. The idea of staying in this room any longer made him nauseous. 

“Hey. I know this is scary.I know this is hard. But it will get better with me. You can do whatever you need to do to get better. No one will hurt you in my tower. Not with me there.” Tony said gently. Wanting Loki to want to go with him.

Loki looked up with an eyebrow raised searching the man for any hint of a lie. For any hint of bad intent. Once again he couldn’t detect anything. He still didn’t want to trust himself.

When Tony continued to get closer Loki stiffened more. He clearly didn’t trust him in the slightest. Not that he could blame him. Espically not after the torture he had been subjected to. God only knows what the people before the two agents did to him. It would likely take a long time for the man in front of him to learn to trust again.

“I’m going to help you up. We can stop whenever you need but I want to get you out of here.” Tony says. Bending down to lean next to Loki.

“Do you think you can do that for me? You're going to need my help.” Tony says in that no-nonsense voice. Where had that even come from anyways?

Loki slowly nods wincing as pain shots up his neck.

Tony smiles a little before slipping off the blanket. He then gently placed his hands so he could help Loki stand. He did this in a way so he was taking most of the weight. 

“Jesus. Remind me to feed you when we get those stitches out.” Tony says when he feels how light the taller man really was.

“Okay. We only need to walk down a hall and into an elevator. Then to a jet. You got this.” Tony says only to feel Loki back up a pace.

He looked over and Loki was frantically shaking his head. Tears flooding his eyes. Pain flashing in those gorgeous green eyes.

“Hey it's only going to be me and you in there. No one to hurt you. Just me and you.” Tony reassured the panicking man. But the man kept shaking his head. Tony grabbed his face forcing him to look into his eyes.

Strong hazel eyes meet frightened green ones. “Listen to me. I am not going to hurt you. I’m not going to let anyone else hurt you. You and I are going to fly back to my base. Once we get there you never have to set foot inside another jet if you don’t want to. Because if someone tried to force you to. They’d have to go through me first. Do you understand?” Tony said firmly. Scanning Loki’s eyes.

Loki swallowed thickly. Nodding slowly. Tony smiled then say’s “good. Let’s go.” Before taking most of the weight again. Standing up hauling the broken god up into a standing position.

Even with most of his weight supported Loki’s legs still buckled under him. He had no muscle mass anymore. How long had he been left to die. Beaten. Abused. Both mentally. And physically. 

Well. He was going to put an end to that. This guy needed someone in his corner. Someone who wouldn’t hesitate to stand up for him when he needed it most.

Once standing Tony adjusted the blanket so Loki was mostly covered. Then he helped him start to walk towards the door. Loki limped a grimace painted on his face pain pulsing through his body.

Tony adjusted his arm and as he did this he felt his ribs. The ones he touched were definitely broken. He could feel the shift. Along with Loki’s grunt. Tony was quick to apologize. Though Loki didn’t seem to acknowledge it. Too focused on getting out of this room. 

Once at the door Tony pushed it open holding it for them. 

For Loki. This was so overwhelming. The cool crisp air. The white hallway. The door leading through the hall. How long had it been since he had seen anything but four walls? 

He had to take a breath. Tears forming in his eyes. The man helping him smiled and reassured him that everything was okay and that he was doing good. No one had said such a thing to him in so long. He didn’t understand why this man was being so kind to him.

As Tony led them slowly down the hall he remembered that he would need to call Pepper to get her to pick some things up for him. Just like clothes. He could get the rest. But he didn’t have much fashion sense. Most of his clothes he had ordered or went with Pepper to get.

Soon they reached the elevator doors. Loki was breathing heavily and leaning heavily against Tony. Not that it bothered Tony. He was happy to help him in any way he could.

The doors opened slowly with a small whine. The. They stepped into the box. Immediately Tony noticed how Loki stiffened. He wasn’t a big fan of elevators himself. But he hated stairs even more. Plus Loki wouldn’t have been able to get up.

“This will be a fast ride. Only up a few floors. Then we are getting on the plane.” Tony said as he pressed the button to the topmost floor. Loki was scanning the room for the whole room. Possibly looking for an escape. Maybe he was looking with awe Thor had when he first came here. They never had anything like this in Asgard. 

There was a ding as the doors slid open exposing them to a short hall that leads out to the airstrip.

Tony leads Loki down the hall. Opening the double doors. Stepping out into the wind and cold. Loki clutched the blanket tighter to himself. Tony wrapped his coat tighter around himself.

There were only two aircraft out on the deck right now. Tony could guess which was the right one. Considering there wasn’t anyone else on board that he could see. He had only recently gotten flight training for small aircraft.

Tony leads Loki to the small aircraft and opens the hatch at the back. There was room for four people. Not including the pilot.

There were tears in Loki’s eyes as he was gently pushed into a seat. A harness was clipped on. This was a much different experience than his last one.

‘Maybe this was the start of something good.’ He thought. But didn’t dwell or get his hopes up. Soon enough he would mess up and Tony would get rid of him as everyone else had.


	8. lift off

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony and Loki get on the jet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yay, another chapter, I hope ya'll beautiful people enjoy it.

“It’s okay Lokes. We won’t be too long. I know this is scary. You’re doing great. You’re way braver than I ever could be.” Tony spoke. Honestly if any of the things that happened to obviously have happened to Loki happened to him he wouldn’t be able to trust anyone.

It was an hour’s flight by jet. If he was alone he’d have gone by suit. Since he had another person flying with him. So he was forced to take a jet.The plane roared to life as Tony started the engine. It then quickly quieted into a low growl. Then a small buzz.

Tony knew it would only be a short flight. He also knows when something traumatic happens to someone just a few minutes in that setting can be unbearable.

Tony piloted the plane onto the runway. He looked back at Loki. He was looking around. Seeming to peer through the window in awe. Tony was hit by a wave of sadness when he saw this. How long was a person locked up that something this simple made them look in awe.

As Tony lifted off he saw Loki grip his seat a little harder. Screwing his eyes shut.

Thor was going to kill someone when he learns that Loki’s alive and in the state he is in. Tony knew he was going to fly here and go on a killing spree. Hela’s going to help too. Neither of them was very level headed when angry.

He wasn’t going to hold them back either. If he were honest with himself. He wouldn’t mind seeing it happen. Williams and Smith could use a dose of their own medicine.

The man in the back of this aircraft had made no attempt on his life. Possibly due to the fact that he was so weak. Maybe that wasn’t who he was as a person. 

If it was the last thing he did. He would find out. He would get to know the broken man behind him. He knew it may take a long time but Loki needed help.

He also wondered how long it would take for Loki to be rehabilitated. He had a medical team at the tower. Loki was in terrible shape though. Worse than he had ever been in. 

Looking back again Tony saw Loki fidgeting with his hands and looking around frantically. A stressed look plastered on his face.

When Tony looked back Loki was peering through to the cockpit. Tony caught sight of his face. He internally winced. The stitches looked painful. He wondered how long they had been in. At least 2 weeks because even that crossed a moral line in the two ruthless agents. Tony hoped.

Thinking about it made Tony want to vomit. He couldn’t imagine how painful it must have been to have the thread pulled through the sensitive skin around the mouth. It hurt enough to just bite your lips. Having something pulled through them must have been unbearable.

To Tony. It was still amazing that Loki had managed to survive six to eight years of torture. He thought he was going to die in that cave and he wasn’t there nearly as long as Loki had been where ever he had been.

Tony also wondered just what they did to him. Going by Thor’s stories Loki had been incredibly strong. Defiant. Brave. Intelligent. And a skilled magic user. But know looking back. Seeing how small. And scared the guy was. It would have made someone question if the stories were actually true.

If tony was an honest man he’d have said that he would have liked to meet the Loki that hadn’t gone through everything that he had. Who he would be. could he have been another avenger. Maybe in another world could he have been a villain?

“When I first meet your brother and sister. They told me stories of the feats you pulled. They’re going to be over the moon to see you again.” Tony said.

Loki’s head snapped up. Had the things he had been told true. Had they been false. Had he always had his sister. Why was everything so confusing? Why couldn’t everything just make sense? Why couldn’t he just be normal?

“Don’t worry I won’t let Thor push you around until you can defend yourself. Then you’re on your own. They aren’t at the tower right now. They haven’t been for a while. They are up on Asgard.” Tony joked.

Loki looked at him with a twinkle in his eyes. Had Asgard truly not fallen. Was his home still standing as it always had. could he go home?

Tony smiled at him. This is what he wanted. He needed to break down the walls. Needed to see who was underneath. Tony had a feeling this was the start of a good thing.

The moment didn’t last as there was a low grumble from Loki’s stomach. The god looked away almost in fear. clutching his stomach. 

“I promise that when we get those stitches out I’m going to feed you anything you want. You say that you want it. You’ll have it okay. Just a little longer and we will be home.” Tony said firmly but not unkindly. Loki didn’t need anyone getting mad at him. Especially for things he couldn’t control. Not when he didn’t even know the last time he had been feed.

Tony was dreading going through the flash drive. He prayed that Williams and Smith weren’t too cruel in their methods. Tony wanted to kill anyone who layed a hand on the man behind him. And he couldn’t understand why considering he had only just met him. Maybe it was because he could relate to him somewhat.

He focused back in front of him. checking the GPS on the control panel in front of him the time had flown by (pun intended) less than twenty minutes away.

He called Jarvis on his phone. 

“I need you to get the medical bay set up. Tell the team to get there as soon as possible. And that they can’t tell a soul about what they see today. Or I will fire them.” tony spoke. Jarvis confirming it and setting out to do his job.

“Loki. Once we land we are going to my medical floor. I won’t be there for it but I will be in the same building. So if anything happens I will be there to protect you.” Tony says. Even though he knows Loki doesn’t fully trust him. 

Once the tower comes into sight Tony begins to slow. He recently installed a landing pad on the roof. Just because he could. And for emergencies.

When the wheels touch the roof tony turns the engine off. He removed his belt. Then gets up to help Loki with his. Upon seeing him Tony smiles. The man is fast asleep. The blanket wrapped securely around himself.


	9. examination

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki meets his doctor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a new chapter for yall beautiful motherfuckers, love yall.

Tony looked down at the sleeping figure with a warm smile. Tony didn’t want to wake him up but would have to to get him to the med bay.

For another minute Tony debated what to do. Maybe he could get a gurney up here. Transfer him onto that and bring him down. At least it would be less stressful for Loki. But was his elevator big enough to get the bed in. He could definitely fit a wheelchair in it. Maybe he could get Loki into that?

Soon Tony came to the conclusion that he would need to wake Loki up. Unfortunately. But he also didn’t want to scare the man too much trying to wake him up or hurt him. So he kneeled down and layed a hand lightly on Loki’s knee. The god jumped and his eyes snapped open. He relaxed slightly when he saw Tony and that they weren’t moving. 

“Sorry for waking you up. But we just arrived. My team is ready. We just have to go to that door. And into the elevator. Then you can sleep for however long you need.” Tony softly spoke. Loki still refused to look him in the eyes without being forced to.

Loki nodded his understanding. Then started trying to taking his harness off. But Tony ended up doing it. It was amazing that Loki still wanted to try to do things himself. Much like Tony had. Maybe Loki wasn’t as broken as Tony thought he was.

Slowly Tony helped Loki into a standing position. Once again taking most of the weight if he told himself the truth he could have carried Loki most of the time. But he wanted to give Loki a sense of accomplishment at the same time.

They make their way towards the door and then to the elevator. The ride was short and but he knew it was putting a strain on Loki’s body. He would be out of commission to a fair amount of time.

When the elevator dinged and the doors slide swiftly open. Tony was greeted by the medical staff. Really only a few needed to be there. But Tony didn’t want to take any chances.

Tony and another nurse helped get Loki over to a bed. Loki still leaned mostly on Tony leaning more away from the man on his other side.

Once on the bed. Tony said that he would be only a floor below them and that if anyone needed anything. To get Jarvis to contact him. He also told the people the god’s name.

Tony hadn’t wanted to impose on the examination. He also didn’t want to see the injuries that Loki sustained. Plus he would only be in the way since he didn’t have any medical experience. He could do basic first aid but was useless beyond that.

Loki couldn’t look at Loki as he left. He couldn’t look at that scared look anymore. He would be called down when the examination was finished. While he waited he wanted to look at the drive anyways. Maybe find some more reasons to kill some people.

Loki watched as the doors slide shut. The man that had helped him just left. And there was no way he could defend himself against just one of the people who surrounded him.

“My name is Dr. Jones. I’m going to be treating you today. Loki we don’t want to hurt you. I need you to relax.” the doctor’s feminine voice softly spoke.

He wasn’t going to just listen to them though. He had to keep his guard up. He wasn’t going to relax because. Beyond the man from before. No one has been kind to him in years.

There was a prick in his arm. His head snapping to the limb. There was a thin metal rod with a tube and the end pushing a liquid into his arm. Slowly his world fell away. The pain was gone. He felt less stressed. And a little tired. He was still awake but he couldn’t really move or fight.

“That was just a sedative. It will make you feel relaxed. But you can be awake to see exactly what we are doing. I also gave you a painkiller. It won’t take the pain completely away but it will take an edge of it.” the doctor said placing a hand on his arm in a comforting way.

The doctor walked away. Then came back with a cart. It had metal equipment placed neatly on it.

“I’m going to take the stitches out first.” she said looking at the people surrounding her who all nod. 

She picked up a set of scissors than looks at him. “this may hurt a little but I will try to be quick.” she says then snips each of the strands of thread on the front of his face. Blood is already starting to flow down his chin and in his mouth. She wipes some of the blood away and grabs some tweezers. She then takes her time pulling each of the threads out. One by one. 

“Well done Loki. You're doing so so well.” The doctor spoke with a soothing tone smiling at him kindly as she wiped the blood from his mouth. He healed quickly even when he was weakened. 

She proceeded to put some sort of lotion over his black eye. Telling him that it will help with the swelling and bruising. It felt weird on his face but he could already feel it helping. The last time he had been on Midgard. They had only just entered the era where they discovered medicine. They had come far. considering how long it had taken them to evolve from more than monkeys.

“Before we continue. Do you want me to give you medicine to put you to sleep for a while. We need to do a full-body examination. Blink once if yes. Twice for no.” She asked. 

And he wanted to. He didn’t want to have to see what they did to him. How they hurt him. He could just let go. But to let that guard down he also knew could and would get him hurt. In some way.

With a blink he let go. He could rest for just a while. Maybe not long but for a little while.

There was a mask slipped over his mouth and nose and something was forced into his lungs. A moment passed and the world fell completely away darkness flooding his vision. He fought it for a moment. Trying desperately the keep his eyes open. But it was a useless fight that he knew he couldn’t win. So he let go and his eyes fell shut.


	10. Keeping an eye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony looks at the videos on the drive.

Tony sat in his lab surrounded by screens. The hard drive plugged into the monitor. It was strange to him to be using an older computer. All of his tech was highly upgraded.

He wanted to start from the beginning. From the plane. Then he would move forward. He knew he only had a little bit of time. He couldn’t be watching this around Loki. He didn’t want him to have to relive the trauma. He needed to know where he should start in his rehabilitation.

He scrolled through the files. Then selected the button for the drive. He had watched Coulson downloading the files and knew that everything was in the right order. He only had to click a button.

He clicked the first video. A clear screen popped up for him. He skipped ahead a bit and stopped as he watched Williams and Smith dragging Loki onto the aircraft. Roughly throwing him into a seat. They didn’t talk only glared at the beaten man. The plane came to life and started to vibrate. And Loki tried to grab something. Probably so he didn’t fall out of his seat or to get off the plane. He started to try to haul himself up using Williams’ arm but Williams just pushed him off. He used the butt of his gun the knock Loki out. Loki fell again and stopped moving.

The anger was already seeping into his veins. If they had strapped the guy in. None of this would have happened. If they had used even a little common sense this could have been avoided.

They just left him on the floor. Bleeding from the mouth. So those handcuffs had been on for two weeks.

He watches the feed for the same day in the interrogation room. They play the same sick game they always do. Ask the person the same question until they get the answer they want. They beat him with a baton. Hitting him over and over again. Asking the same questions again. Then beating him with the baton.

They did this for an hour until they gave up and left. But Loki was telling the truth they just didn’t want to believe him.

The next day they came in early throwing Loki into the wall and asking questions if they didn’t get the answer they wanted they would punch him. Kick him. Throw him around. Throw things at him. Anything the could think to do to him.

Loki didn’t cry or even scream during it. And his answers remained the same. He didn’t give them what they wanted. He gave them the truth.

When they got bored they left. Loki still had his handcuffed behind his back. He shuffled back to his corner. He didn’t sleep. He stayed up and kept guard. No wonder he had crashed on the jet if he had been trying to do this for two weeks.

The next two days they kept on asking the same questions when he didn’t answer they tasered him until he was almost unconscious. The other day they threw boiling water onto him. 

Tony remembers Thor saying that Loki was a frost giant and that heat wasn’t good for him. Throwing boiling water on anyone would do damage to anyone. But the reaction was even worse for Loki. This was the very first time since he got here that he cried out or even just whimpered. Yet he still didn’t change his answer.

As he watched he saw Loki cry more. His face was covered in blood. The water badly burned him. Only taking a small amount of blood with it.

Loki still didn’t sleep. He must have been exhausted. God only knows when the last time he had slept was.

The video days crept by slowly as he watched.

The idiots always asked the same thing. But the length of the punishment. The number of hits. And the force behind their attacks. All increased. Leaving Loki badly injured. They never once feed him. Or gave him anything to drink. They wouldn’t even bring in a doctor to take out the stitches.

The worst day was the day that they pulled out a whip. Loki collapsed in front of them reduced to a sobbing mess on the floor. Whimpering and shaking profusely.

They only had gotten a few strikes in. Before Loki became to incoherent to answer any of the questions. They had been forced to stop for the day.

Some days they would come in and be in a relatively good mood. Those where the best days for Loki. They were slightly gentler in their methods. Not yelling as loudly. Not hitting as hard. And leaving faster.

The sixth day was the hardest for Tony to watch. They brought in two jugs of water and a towel. They both looked to be in a sour mood.

Smith grabbed Loki by the neck. Throwing him to the ground roughly. Williams stepped on Loki’s chest. Smith put the cloth over he face holding it tightly at the back of Loki’s head.

Williams opened the jugs placing them next to Smith who grabbed one and poured it over Loki’s face. Loki couldn’t even cough to get the water out properly. He sputtered and tried to cough.

They asked if he was going to cooperate with them and answer the question honestly. He nodded but answered the same way as before. They repeated the process until the first bottle was empty.

At that point Tony couldn’t watch anymore. Images of his torture flashing through his mind. It was too much. It was performed in a different way. But it was still what happened to him. He needed to turn off the computer and take a break.

He stood up. Walking to the stairs. He was only a few floors from the penthouse. He needed something light to drink. He didn’t need to be drunk when he went down to see Loki.

Thinking of the god he wondered how long the examination was going to take. He wondered what was wrong with him. If he could recover fully from it physically.

Mentally was going to be a different story. No one could fully recover from torture for that long. There was no way.

As he sipped on his drink. He pondered. Thinking of how life would be now that he had another Norse god living with him. Only this one was traumatized beyond belief. He would need to tell the group.

“Sir your presence is requested in the med bay.” Jarvis’ voice broke through his thoughts. Tony stood to race to the elevator.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys, I'm glad I have a couple of chapters of this story stocked up, I just got new glasses, and the other day got in a minor collision, I'm not hurt myself but writing may slow down for a little because I don't know when I'll be able to focus enough to write. sorry, this one was late but I've been really tired since the accident.


	11. how to start down a unknown road

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony and Loki's doctor review Loki's health

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to thank everyone for being so supportive, I have found that writing at night and just focusing on that gets the work done, so hopefully, chapters won't slow down as much as they could have. This chapter has a second part to it.

Tony raced to the elevator. He didn’t want to keep the doctor too long. That's what he told himself at least.

He pushed the button for two floors down. He waited impatiently for the elevator to arrive at its destination. 

With a high pitched ding the elevator door open. He is hit with that horrible antiseptic smell that no one likes. Causing him to wrinkle his nose in disgust.

The room was mostly empty now. It made sense considering that they didn’t need a full team to help one person. Not once the worst was out of the way.

The head doctor sat in a chair in a corner room. It was made of glass so it was incredibly easy to see through.

He felt as though his heart was beating out of his chest. He had to know what was wrong. But at the same time. He didn’t want to know. 

The doctor was reading a file it seemed. Her long brown hair flowing down her shoulder. Her face was pale but a perfect shape. Her brown eyes concentrated on the papers in front of her.

She looked up from her papers briefly. Spotting tony. Then with a warm smile waved him to the room.

With a breath. Tony walked towards the door. His gut was churning and his chest felt like someone was stabbing him.

When he reached the door dr. Jones was standing with the door opened. He greeted her when he stepped in. Taking a seat across from her desk. Sitting still. His leg bouncing from the stress of it all.

He heard the door close and Dr. Jones made her way to her desk.

“Tony where did you find him?” she asked bluntly.

“He was on the shield helicarrier. Two agents were interrogating him. Their form of integration is slightly different than ours. Why?” Tony askes a bite in the word agents.

“Because he is in the worst shape I’ve ever seen at once. Let alone treated.” she said making Tony’s eyes widen. This doctor had been with him since before Afghanistan. 

“Is he going to recover?” Tony asked. Worry clear in his tone.

“I believe so. But only due to his biology. If he were human. He would definitely be dead at this point.” she says running long fingers through her hair.

“Well what’s even wrong with him anyway. And how do I help him from here?” Tony asked he was going to help Loki than he was going to get in touch with thor and get Loki back to Asgard so he can be with his true family. 

“Well it looks like he hasn’t eaten in a year at least. His muscle mass is gone. He won’t be able to walk for a long time without help. His legs are too weak. So the first thing you’ll need to do is make sure he eats. But don’t feed him to much because his stomach won’t be able to handle it.” she says. Tony already wished he had a notepad to write this down on.

“Can you write what you need me to do. And tell me. I know I won’t remember it all. My memory isn’t amazing.” he asked a sheepish look on his face.

“Sure but you’ll have to remember where that is.” she says a grin on her face momentarily forming.

“Yeah. Yeah I know.” Tony says rolling his eyes. He got this all the time from Pepper and Jarvis.

“So what else do I need to know?” Tony askes trying to move the conversation along.

“Well he has a stage three concussion. He’ll need to stay in bed for a while. He will be very sensitive to light. But he’ll be here with me for a while. So I can watch for any signs of him worsening.” She said 

“But after that. Make sure he doesn’t think too much or put any strain on himself. Also watch for any vomiting” She says. Writing it down at the same time.

Tony only nods listening and trying to retain as much information as he could.

“He has a dislocated shoulder. I have no idea of when it happened. But we set it again. He’ll be in a sling for about two weeks. Then he can’t lift anything. With his combined weight loss. And strain on himself.” She says looking up to make sure Tony is listening.

“His mouth is another story. I’ve never seen anything like it in my life. We had him on pain relief and a sedative while I tried to remove the stitches. But he was still in pain. Once I got them out I asked him if he wanted to go to sleep for it. He said yes so I just used anesthesia. All I can do for him right now is watch and make sure he doesn’t get any infections.” she shudders as she tells him this. Tony had done the same when he had seen the state of Loki’s face.

“His back is in terrible shape too. There isn’t an area on his back that isn’t covered in whip marks. A lot of them look infected as well. I have bandaged his back and cleaned it up. As well as administering an antibiotic. You’ll have to give him the antibiotic twice a day.” the Dr says holding up the antibiotic. 

“Okay I can do that no problem.” he said nodding there was so much he needed to do to help Loki. 

“Good. Loki’s windpipe was nearly crushed by something. It looks like a large hand. So he has a neck brace on right now. Just until he gets better. For support. He also seems to have hurt his back. He’s not paralyzed. There is just a disk out of place. It will heal with time if he’s anything like his brother.” She says Tony hoped the list isn’t too much longer. It was too long as it was. 

“His ribs are in bad shape to. Three on the right side are cracked and four of the left are broken. I have a pressure bandage on them to help them heal. It will also help with the bandages on the other side. But all his ribs have been broken at least. Once.” she says Tony nods his understanding.

“His fingers on his right hand have been broken at each knuckle. His fingernails have all been ripped off on the other hand. So they are wrapped up. Or have splints on.” She says 

“That’s weird he didn’t seem to be in pain when he was writing earlier. Just telling me his name. Just one-word answers.” Tony says puzzled.

“Well. Victims of long periods of torture sometimes learn to ignore their pain. This may have happened to him if he acknowledged his pain he likely would have passed out long ago.” Dr. Jones explains. 

Tony nods. He understood now. “How can I help with that?”

“Well once his fingers heal. You can help him to relearn to write. You’ll also need to give him these pain medicine and the antibiotics I showed before once I release him to you.” she says holding up another bottle of pills.

“Okay is that all?” Tony askes hoping it was all. His heart sank when the doctor let out a small sigh.

“No. I wanted to save this for last. Because it is hard for anyone to find out. But we ran a rape kit.” she said solemnly. 

“And?” Tony asked already knowing the answer. But praying otherwise.


	12. how to start down a unkown road pt2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony and Dr. Jones continue their talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is the second and last part of Tonys chat with Loki's doctor. I am physically better from my accident now, I wasn't the one driving and don't really pay attention when in the passenger seat of a car, so that's lucky for me. we are all still working out things with our insurance companies but everything should start going back to normal, which means I'll be able to focus solely on this.

“It came back positive.” she said a look of anger on her face.

“What?” Tony quietly asked. Half hoping he had heard wrong.

“It came back positive. And it doesn’t seem to be the first time it happened.” she repeated.

This was the topping of the problem cake. The damage to his body and likely his mind. But this takes the cake. What kind of monster could think of doing that to another person.

“How long ago did it happen?” he growled out. He swore to god. If those two assholes did this to Loki. He would fly there himself and slaughter them.

“It doesn’t seem like it happened recently.” she said. Thank god.

“How did you even know to check?” he asked. It was an honest question if it hadn’t happened recently how did she know to check.

“For three reasons. One it’s a protocol when someone who’s clearly been tortured comes in. I make sure to do any test I can. Just so I can help in any way possible. Two because when I cut his clothes off him I noticed healing bruises on his hips. They were in the shape of hands. As if someone was holding him still. Three when I noticed the tissue around his anus was torn I put things together. They must have been really rough with him. Whoever did this to do that type of damage that has yet to heal.” she says as if it any normal conversation.

“That just sick. I’ll never understand how someone can do that to someone else.” he said. Just thinking about it made him want to throw up. 

“Tony I don’t know either. But I do know that you can’t help him all on your own. You are going to need help.” she said blatantly.

Tony nods “well I want him to heal fully.”

“I know that which is why I will turn him over to you. But before I do. I want you to know that I have a psychology degree. I can help him through some of it. He can come to talk anytime he wants. And I can help too.” she said placing her head in her hands.

“So you’re a therapist too?” Tony asked not. Just making sure.

“Yes. He can trust me. But he will need a physical therapist as well. Can you make that work?” she askes. Of course. He could. He was a billionaire. After all. He could afford almost anything.

“Yeah I can. Is there anything else?” he asked

“He may not come out and tell you if he’s in pain or not. But don’t push too hard. You may have to ask if he is.” she says. It made sense if he was so used to living in pain.

“Okay. Oh. And what should I be feeding him?” he questioned.

“Well you have to take it slow at first. Small meals multiple times a day. And things that are high in nutrients. But low in salt. Things like peanut butter. Nutrition shakes. Meat. Canned fish. Things that are high in potassium like potatoes and bananas. As he gains weight you can start to have bigger meals fewer times a day. Don’t give him things high in sugar. Like pasta and fruit juice. Only give him the necessary amounts of water.” she stated.

“Okay. But why can’t I give him more water than necessary?” he queried.

“Because you can overload his systems. He’ll shut down. I don’t know the last time he was feed or given water. But I can see that he is dehydrated and extremely malnourished.” she explained.

It honestly made Tony sick to think about Loki’s treatment. How had he even survived all of it. Anyone else would have died by now. But the man in the next room is strong enough to survive all of it. Which in his book is pretty damn amazing.

“How do you think he could have survived everything?” Tony asked he wanted to hear what the doctor had to say about the whole thing.

“Sheer will. I know he’s a god. But even Thor would have had a hard time surviving what he’s been through. I really think it’s amazing that Loki could have gone through all of it and still live to tell the tale. Not that I really want to know everything that’s happened to him.” she said a hint of humor in the last sentence.

“Who was he with when you found him anyways? I thought shield was supposed to be honorable?” The doctor said with a raised eyebrow.

“They are. Most of the agents actually are. Except these two. Agents Williams. And Smith. They are willing to go all out to get information out of a person. Cruel or not.” Tony states rage flowing through him.

“What did they do to him. And do you know how bad he was when he arrived here?” she asked curiosity clear in her voice.

“I’ve only gotten so far in the video feed. But so far I’ve seen them. Throw him around like a rag doll. Beat him with a baton. Kick him and punch him where ever they could reach. Tasered him. Throw boiling water onto him. They got a couple hits in with a whip. And I stopped watching when they waterboarded him.” he listed face turning red with each thing he listed.

“Holy crap. That is ridiculous. No wonder he’s in the shape he is in.” Dr. Jones speakers bewildered.

“When he first got here he was in horrible shape to. Only a few things that I can see that is worse. His head probably. They loved to hit him in the head. On the plane to the helicarrier one of them knocked Loki out with the but of his gun.” Tony says. Shaking slightly.

“He’s going to be okay with help. We don’t know fully how his mind is at this point since we don’t know what the person before us did to him. All we can do is be there for him when he needs to talk.” she points out. Watching Tony nod.

There was a knock on the door and a short man with gray hair poked his head in.

“He’s up if you want to see him.” he says a warm smile spreading over his lips.

“Thank you. Tom. We will be out in a moment.” she says looking him in the eyes.

“Tony you’re going to have to calm down before we go out there because as you should now. He easily senses emotions. And you don’t need to stress him out.” she explains.

Tony breathed in and out until he felt calm.” he nodded standing.

They made they’re way to the door. Opening it. 

‘It’s time to face the music.’ he thought.


	13. waking up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki, Tony, and Dr. Jones have a talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey yall, I hope you enjoy this chapter, I've been enjoying writing it more than anything, so I hope it turned out well.

Dr. Jones was the first person at Loki’s bedside. She was closely followed by Tony.

He looked rough. And exhausted. Eyes heavy and half-lidded as he stared up at the ceiling.

He heard them approaching and turned his eyes to them. Stiffening slightly. Relaxing slightly when he recognized them again.

“Hi Loki. I know you’re probably tired right now but I want to ask you a few questions. You shouldn’t be speaking right now. Because of the damage to your throat. So just blink once for yes twice for no. Alright?” she spoke. Loki blinked once.

“I need you to be honest with me through all of this. No matter how difficult it may be. We aren’t going to hurt you though. You are safe here.” she said softly. Lightly tapping his knee.

“Okay Loki my first question is. Are you in any physical pain?” she asked. It was a simple question. But for someone so used to hiding the fact that they were in pain. It could be more challenging.

Loki blinked once after a few moments of thought.

“Is it a lot of pain?” She asked. Two blinks.

“Do you want me to give you some more medicine. It will take some of it away.” she asked.

Loki sat thinking just looking forward. The heart monitor always became faster when he was thinking. Maybe he was wondering if this was just a big trick on him.

He then slowly blinked once.

Dr. Jones went to the other side of the bed. Pressed a button. And something shot into Loki’s vain.

“What was that?” Tony asked. He trusted the woman but didn’t want to take any chances.

“Just morphine.” she said smirking and looking at him through the corner of her eye.

“Okay. Now Loki. Are you hungry?” she asked.

To Tony it was obvious. Of course. He was. He hadn’t eaten in over two weeks. Who wouldn’t be hungry.

There were tears in Loki’s eye’s as he blinked a yes.

He still believed that it was a trick. But he wanted it to last as long as possible. He didn’t want to return to that hell.

Dr. J briefly left to get something for Loki to have and Tony took his chance.

“Hey Loki. I know what you’re thinking. And no this isn’t a trap in any way. I and her do actually care. So does thor. And you mother and father. We want you to get better. Than if you want you can stay here or you can go back to Asgard. It’s all up to you. And I know that you feel overwhelmed. But it’s going to get better. I promise. Do you understand?” he asked stepping so he can whisper to Loki.

Loki blinked once. Tears still flooding his vision.

Dr. J returned holding a shake and a straw.

“Right now you can only have liquids until your throat has healed. Then you can have real food. This here is a protein shake.” she said as she held up the bottle.

She opened the cap slipped the straw in. Then walked closer to the man in the bed.

He flinched as she passed it to him so he could take a mouthful.

“It’s okay. I don’t want to hurt you. None of us do.” she spoke softly with a warm smile spread over her face.

Loki took the straw and took a sip. It was cool and thick. It was the most delicious thing Loki had ever tasted. Maybe it was the lack of food or liquids for such a long time.

He soon finished the drink. Frowning when nothing was left. 

It was only then that he. At some point had started to cry. He looked down trying to stop the flow of tears.

Tony felt pity for him. How long had it been for Loki. That something this small could draw such a reaction from him. Something that was so small to anyone else being so huge for Loki.

It also made him angry. How could anyone treat another human being like that. It was ridiculous. Starving someone of necessities.

Slowly the tears stopped and Loki sat there. Running his hand on the fabric of the bedsheet. He smiled. It was small but it was there. It made Tony happy himself. To see someone so broken have a smile on their face.

Dr. Jones smiled too. It was such a touching and heartbreaking scene. To have someone smile just by touching something. It broke her heart. This man didn’t deserve what he was put through. No one did.

But here before they were a beaten abuse hurt man. A man that with help was going to get back on his feet. While he’ll never be the same person as he was before. He could receive the help he needs and recover somewhat. Become a happier person. A less fearful person. Someone who didn’t flinch when he was handed something. 

Both Tony and Jones knew it was going to take a lot of work between the both of them to help him. But they would if it was the last thing they did.

Loki’s eyes darted around hearing footsteps approaching before anyone else did.

The doctor from before came up holding something in his hand that he handed to Jones.

“Thank you.” she says Tom nodded and scurried off to complete his other tasks.

She walked around placing the device on the table next to Loki. He watched her every step. Wide green eyes tracking. They held so much intelligence and wit. But also fear and pain.

A shudder ran up Tony’s spine. As he and Loki locked eyes. Loki dropped his eyes right away. Looking down at his lap.

“Okay Loki. This is a pager. If you need anything. You press this button and I will come over. Absolutely anything. If you just want some company then you can page me. If you need to use the washroom. You page me. Anything. Okay?” she asked oblivious to the men awkwardly looking away.

He blinked once. Telling her he understood.

His eyes once again began to droop. Nearly shutting again. Only for them to snap open again.

“You can get some rest big guy. You’re doing amazing. I’ll come down to keep your company later.” Tony said smiling.

Tony and Dr. J both left together. Expecting Loki to sleep.

He didn’t dare to though. He wanted this wonderful dream to last. He didn’t want to wake up to that nightmare again.


	14. keeping an eye pt.2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> while Tony waits he finished watching the videos on the drive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next chapter y'all, hope you guys enjoy.

Tony took the elevator back up to the lab. He wanted to finish watching the security feed.

Just thinking about it made him slightly nauseous. The idea that anyone could do that turned his stomach.

He tapped his fingers on his forearm as he waited for the lift to reach the right floor. It felt as though it was going slower than usual.

Finally. The door opened and Tony stepped out. He scanned the room. Everything was where it should be. Maybe he was just more on edge than usual.

He shook his head back and forth. Nothing was going to go wrong with Jarvis on watch. He had programmed him to be able to defend the tower for emergencies.

The only sound in the room was his footsteps as he made his way to the desk. It was unsettling. To say the least. Maybe he had come to drown out the silence. His thoughts usually filled the silence enough. So he never had to sit in silence. 

As he switches on the monitor he took in the emptiness of this particular room. It seemed like it had nothing in it. He blamed this on his lab that was always overloaded with everything he was working on whether it was of thing he was tinkering with or a new suit. The room was just always full but since he was on a different floor that was rarely used there was nothing he would fill it with.

He watched the screen light up. Only a page from where he previously was. He made sure to skip the previous video so he didn’t have to watch that again.

As the video loaded Tony’s mind wandered. Think about how long Loki must have been with his previous captor to turn out like this. Of what they did to him.

He put a stop to those thoughts right away. He didn’t like seeing what he was seeing. He didn’t want to see them break someone.

He watched as Loki scanned the room possibly looking for threats or an escape route.

Tony wondered how bad of a beating Loki was going to get it always depended on what kind of mood Williams and Smith were in on that day. It wouldn’t be better if they were in a good mood. But they were terrible when they were pissed off.

The door crashed open and Tony knew it was going to be bad today. One of them was in a foul mood.

Williams stomped into the room. Grabbed Loki from the corner by the collar lifting him off the ground like he weighed nothing. 

He slammed him into the wall. He was whispering in his ear. A look of pure dread was on Loki’s face.

He nodded after being slammed into the wall. They kept on asking him questions. They were always the same. And for every answer. Loki was thrown onto the ground into a wall. His head crashing into things constantly.

On a particularly rough fall. Williams grabbed Loki’s arm and hauled him up. But considering the force. The fact that Loki’s arms where pinned behind his back. And the weakness of Loki’s body his arm gave out and a nauseating pop could be heard. Loki was thrown to the ground. 

Suddenly Williams turned red. Jumping onto Loki pinning him to the ground. He grabbed the side of his head and started to use his full weight to repetitively ram Loki’s head into the concrete.

Loki lost consciousness on the 7th hit. And it took Smith actually hauling Williams off the fallen good to get him to stop.

There was blood from Loki’s head everywhere. And Loki just remained still. Unmoving. He stayed that way for ten minutes when his eyes slowly opened and he sat up crawling back to his corner.

He winced when he touched the back of his head. Likely due to the pain.

At least tony knows how. Where. And when he got the concussion. Those two agents are either gonna lose their jobs or lose their lives. Depends on if he. Thor. And hela or Coulson get to them first. He very well knows that if he sees those two he’s not going to need a suit to kill them.

Tony closed the video. Normally the two only went in once asked their questions took out their anger. And left. 

Tony usually fast forwards the videos to make sure he doesn’t miss anything. And to make sure that nothing overly worrying happens to the god. Any behavior changes. Passing out after the head hitting.

Nothing usually happens. But on the next video Loki seems to be trying to throw up. Unable to due to the stitches. He is on his hands and knees retching. Tears flowing down his face. His face is more pale than usual somehow.

That day the two assholes come in. They seem halfway calm today. That could be lucky for Loki right now. He can’t take too many more bad hits to the head. He should have to take them in the first place.

They take out a knife. It was just a switchblade but it was clearly sharpened to do significant damage.

They approached Loki they sliced shallow lines in his skin when he didn’t answer with what they wanted. The good didn’t even flinch when they cut into his torso. Didn’t groan or anything. He just sat there like it was nothing. And maybe it was. Clearly. He had been through much worse.

As the days dragged on he watched as the two men took anything they could find that would do damage. They threw him into the table. They hit him with a baseball bat.

That had been rough to watch. They hit mostly in the ribs. And the bat was metal so you could hear the sound of Loki’s ribs being broken.

There were only two more days left and he came in. On those two days they had been in pretty good moods. So the beating was less severe. They used the taser again. And than the baton again. Loki didn’t sleep hardly at all. And could almost always be found in the very corner he had found him in when he went to help him.

By the end Tony feels horrible. Sure he hadn’t known what was happening. But he knows the two men. He knows how violent they can be. He can and has hacked into Shield before. He should have been keeping a closer eye on the two psychopaths. 

If he had done so he may have been able to stop it faster and save the man some torture. His problem was that he wanted to help everyone. He wanted to rid himself of his own guilt from his time as the merchant of death. He couldn’t of course help everyone. But he could have helped the man lying in a hospital bed right now.


	15. His Thoughts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki lays awake thinking.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a lot has just gone down in my life, separate from the accident, I don't think updates will be a problem, but I'm not one hundred percent sure.

Loki layed in the bed. He wouldn’t sleep. He wasn’t that naive to let his guard down. 

No matter how tired he was. How much he just wanted to rest. How with his stomach satisfied he felt comfortable. His eyes felt heavy. But he wasn’t in much pain. For the first time in forever. He could truly say that he felt a little safe and warm.

This would likely stop any minute. So he had to stay awake and alert. Even if there want much he could do to protect himself since he couldn’t even walk right now. 

Soon he told himself. Soon he would be stronger again. He would heal and with his magic. He would be able to defend himself. Right now though. He had to rest to regain some of his ability to defend. To attack took more energy which he couldn’t afford to lose. So most of his magic went to healing him.

Tony was kind to him so far. Letting him stay here. Telling him that everything was going to be okay now that he was here. That he could stay until he was better then he could choose to go home again. 

Slowly he was working through what was real and fake. Asgards fall was fake. His adopted family hating him was fake. Them hating him for being jotun was fake. They never told him the frost giants were savages. But they were a peaceful race. 

He didn’t know some things still though. Such as when he met his biological family. Or if he really did try to kill them. Or if he tried to start a war out of anger at Thor. And if he was sent to Midgard to attack.

It was a very slow process but with time he would work his way through his muddled thoughts and be able to think straight again. He would know real from fake. His own thoughts from things that were put there. 

He hated himself for being so weak. And so confused. All the time. And a part of him knew it wasn’t fully his fault. He hadn’t had any control over what Thanos did to him. But another part of him told him that he should have fought more.

So he sat there quietly. He had enjoyed the short company. He hadn’t seen anyone that hadn’t had bad intent towards him in so long. And although he couldn’t find any bad intent in the doctor and Tony he still was wary. He didn’t know if he could even trust himself anymore. 

Everything was happening so fast. For so long it was one thing every day. And although it was horrible. He liked that it was always the same. Now he had switched locations. He had switched tortures. And then once again changed places. But he was being treated so differently it was weird now.

He didn’t know why his hands were wrapped up though. They didn’t hurt. They hurt when the Chitauri broke his fingers and ripped the nails off. But they didn’t hurt anymore. They hadn’t for a while. Just as most injuries he had sustained have.

His arm was cradled in a strange bag that held his arm. There was a strap that went around his neck to support his arm. It took some pressure off his shoulder. It was hurting as if it had been injured. He couldn’t remember when it was injured other than a while ago when it had been torn from its socket.

His neck had a stiff collar around it that made it impossible for him to move his neck. It wasn’t doing much. It was still hard to breathe and swallow so he really didn’t understand the point of the thing.

But he left it all where it was as he was supposed to. If he wanted to do something he had to click the button to call the person from before.

He never wanted to end up like this. He wanted to go home. But he didn’t know if he could survive a trip through the bi-frost in the state he is in.

He wants to see his friends again. His brother and sister. His father and mother. He wanted to be in his room reading his books.

He had been shown a life that he hadn’t lived. A lonely sad life with less love that he had had all his life. Honestly. He just wanted to go back to being wanted by someone. Anyone.

Maybe he didn’t deserve to be wanted. But he wanted it so bad. More than he could ever say.

He wanted love. To be who he was. To be without pain. Without hunger. How his life had been before he was kidnapped by the mad titan. For reasons still unknown to him.

He didn’t want to think like this anymore. It hurt his heart. Who knows when he’d be able to go back to Asgard.

He watched outside at the white room scanning what he could for possible escape routes. He could only see one. Straight out there was a door. The same door he came through with the moving box.

If he could get out of the bed he could crawl to the door. It would be challenging but he could do it if he needed to he certainly hoped he would have to.

But only with some time. He could get stronger. And use his magic to help. It was what he had wanted to do all of his life. To be able to help weaker people. He would help who he could. He would learn to be a worrier like Thor was.

Unlike what Thanos had put in his head. He didn’t want a throne. He didn’t want that burden. He wanted to help those among him. That would be everything he would ever ask for in this life. Sure it was a long one. But it would be a good one.

He would thrive. He would come to beat those who hurt him. Have them locked away. He didn’t want to kill anyone or anything. He wants to help them become better people. To show that everyone should get another chance. Just as he is getting nowhere.

Once he is better he will return to Midgard and help them. To repay those who have helped him.

He also wants to talk to two people from the gray room. He wants to know why they did what they did. And if he did something to them that he can’t remember doing. Maybe talk to them. He wouldn’t hurt them. He would just want to talk. 

It was just who he was. He never wanted to hurt anyone. He truly only wanted to help.


	16. his special song

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki thinks more about his shattered world

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys, so I want to say again, that I'd like some constructive criticism, I am going back and editing the previous chapters, so if you can see any obvious problems, let me know, otherwise enjoy.

As Loki laid awake he wondered what Thor would be like now, had he changed at all? had he become any smarter than he was.

Loki honestly hoped he had because he had been an idiot sometimes. picking fights with the wrong people, never doing his work. He was strong though, if Thor was anything it would be strong, he was always built to be a warrior.

While Loki had always been small and slim. Never having the muscles like most typical Asgardian men. (he never really liked that look anyways) He had always felt the want to be gentle not going around and fighting with others for no reason, he preferred to be in the library reading or with his small group of friends.

A shiver ran up his spine at the thought of his friends. Not that he didn’t love them but they too had been stolen from him when he was with Thanos. He was shown his life when he was always alone.

When he went back home, he wanted to see his friends again as soon as possible. Gods how he missed them, they had done so much together. always playing little pranks on others, no one was ever harmed and it was all fun and games. They had gotten in trouble for it so many times though. Father was always lenient with them usually just telling them that they couldn’t see each other for a few days.

he thought of his older sister. She had always been protective of him and Thor and would be furious when he or Thor managed to get themselves injured. She would do anything for them if the punishment was unfair she would say so when no one else would.

He remembers the first time he was whipped by his torturers. the agony coursed through his veins, he had called out to Hela, pleading with her to help him. Begging her to tell the people doing this to him that it was unfair. 

He broke more and more every time he called out only to get no answer. Every time he called out to anyone he knew, It chipped away at his soul driving him further and further into his own mind.

He thought about his family a lot through his time there. How much he wanted to go back, just to see them one more time. To hug Thor one last time, to play one more prank with his friends, to talk to Hela again, to tell his father and mother, both biological and adopted, that he loves them.

To see Asgard once more, to eat at the table with his family again, instead of off the cold floor of his cell when they threw him a small morsel of food every so often.

When he was released he had thought Asgard had fallen, and that he wouldn’t have a home to go back to, no family, no friends, nothing. He had thought that he would be doomed to be alone forever. in a strange realm with strange people.

When he had arrived and been taken by those strange men, he thought that he would be stuck there to go through even more torture.

But Tony had taken him here to his home. For reasons unknown to him. Where was the catch? what would he do to repay the man’s generosity?

These people had given him food, somewhere to rest, and had even treated his wounds.

When would he mess up, and then be tossed out like the garbage he was? He didn’t want to be left alone again. He had been alone for so long, and being here was already so nice.

Surely this wasn’t permanent when he got back to being able to get around, he would be expected to leave and make a living for himself.

The thoughts of this were terrifying having to leave again, having to go out on his own, he would ever likely die. Not that he would be upset if it did, who would even miss him? everyone already thought him dead, who would look for him? No one would really care.

He knew it was dangerous to have those thoughts. He just couldn’t help it if his mind supplied them for him.

Many warriors had thoughts when they returned from wars they were similar to his, returning to the battlefield, the battle still raging within them.

He wanted to keep this to himself if he could because who would want to have a broken creature around? They already knew he was externally broken, but they didn’t know he was broken inside as well.

Everything was moving so fast for him, he could feel his magic slowly returning to him, all if it still went to healing his body. He could feel it working its way through him, healing the worst of his injuries first.

He wanted to sleep, and he knew he should because it would help him heal, but his instincts told him to stay up and keep guard.

He wished he could rest easy as he did before, well he always suffered from nightmares. It was part of who he was. He usually was found asleep curled up with his brother or Hela, but he stopped doing that when he reached his teens and learned that it was weird for him to sleep with his brother or sister no matter the circumstances, 

Thor always told him that he didn’t mind and enjoyed his company when he did stay with him, but he didn’t want to seem any weirder than he already was. 

His thoughts were interrupted when the female healer from before walked with a clipboard in her hand.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I’m just checking your vital signs, have you slept yet?” she asked, seemingly startled looking him in the eyes and waiting for an answer.

He thought about it but blinked twice for no.

“That’s okay It’s going to be hard to sleep on your own for a while. Do you want me to give you some medicine to help you sleep?” she asked with a warm understanding smile on her face.

He blinked once for yes.

She nodded stepping out for a moment then came back in with a small pill and glass of water.

“If you can’t take this I will try to find something else to give you but this is the best we have quickly on hand at the moment,” she said, giving him some water and then telling him to put the pill in his mouth, take a mouthful of water and to swallow.

He did as instructed and the pill was easily taken.

“It may take a few minutes to work but it should work pretty quick,” she says then goes back to check his vitals.

After she leaves he feels the medication starts to kick in. As he lets the world fall away he hums himself the special song that his mother sang to him to get him to fall asleep.


	17. the start of something good

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony starts to prepare Loki's room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> anyone who is still here has made it to some happy chapters, there is three on a row, the last one is the longest chapter I've written so I hope you guys enjoy.

Two days had passed. He had heard about Loki’s poor sleeping, how he needed medicine to get any sleep. He also learned that he likes to have someone next to him. Even if they didn’t talk to him, he just wanted someone around. So Tony had started to spend more time in the medbay, just keeping him company. 

Seeing Loki’s eyes glow and a smile spread on his face made everything worth it. Although he had no clue what he was doing at this point.

Loki was patient while Tony tried to get to know him a bit more, things he liked and everything.

Loki never seemed annoyed with Tony’s constant questions. He was also a great listener. 

Tony had thought about his current predicament, he needed to set up a room for Loki. It needed to be close to him and the kitchen. He wanted the god to have plenty of food whenever he needed it.

He had plenty of spare rooms and he knows it. He wanted this to be for as long as needed, maybe he would even leave it as it was, just in case Loki came back with Thor for visit. Maybe at that point, he could put him on his own floor, and if he stayed here he would most definitely set up a floor for him.

He hoped Thor would come back soon. Seeing someone he recognized would likely do Loki some good.

The guy seemed happy now that he was away from everything. Though he was clearly wary, not that it could be helped considering everything he threw. but Tony wanted to see him relaxed.

Maybe if Tony got him something to sleep with it would help. A lot of people sleep better when they have something to sleep with, a stuffed animal, or a blanket. 

Maybe that would help with the nightmares too, he was bound to have them after everything. Plus he couldn’t live off of medicine to sleep.

Tony realized that he had veered off track of what he was thinking of earlier. He had played a guessing game with Loki earlier, asking him things he liked. Basically he would say a random activity and Loki would blink once or twice.

He had blinked twice most of the time. He didn’t like most outdoor activities, the reason was unknown to him, he didn’t like fighting. Although he had pondered that for a moment whether to blink once or twice. He also didn’t like swimming, or singing and dancing.

He did find out that he liked to travel, so a map of their earth would be going up along with a globe. He liked reading, so a bookshelf, Loki would fill it up with what he wanted to read. He liked to write, so a desk and writing utensils paper of any sort. Painting, so art supplies. He also liked to go for walks and music. 

Tony knows he would need help regaining his ability to use his hands.Maybe having an instrument would help him learn to use them again. To help him get control again, writing would also help with that.

Once he was able, he would take him for walks around. They may just be short but it would help him regain his muscles.

He had plenty of money to show him places around the world. He had a license to fly but he didn’t know how it would work if Loki wouldn’t get on a plane. 

He wanted to make new memories for Loki, ones that are good.

As he wrote things down on a pad of things for the god, (the same one he had the list of things he needed to help Loki with on, he had written it again so he had an extra list that he could fit in his pocket) he realized that he hadn’t asked what colors he preferred.

The reason it was important was because it would help him decide what colors to paint Loki’s room.

He shrugged and made his way to the elevator, he would just have to ask him.

Once he was on the correct floor he left the elevator, making his way to the room.

Loki was sitting just staring straight ahead, eyes glazed over, heart beating a little too fast.

As he got close, he reached out and gently touched Loki’s knee. He jumped and snapped his head to Tony, relaxing and smiling brightly at him.

“Sorry I didn’t mean to spook you, you looked like you were lost in your mind.” 

Loki looked down slightly, clearly embarrassed, a small blush reddening his ears, usually, he would tease someone for it. It probably wasn’t exactly appropriate to do.

“Its alright happens to me too. I just wanted to ask you what color you like.” 

Loki looked up, an eyebrow raised, Tony was always blunt and terrible at breaching subjects gracefully.

“I’ll just list names you blink yes or no do you understand, it’ll be just like before?” 

Blink 

They played this game for a while.

Soon Tony found out that Loki didn’t like red, orange, purple, pink, white, and brown.

He also found out that Loki likes blue, green, yellow, black, and gray.

Tony had all of it written down on the pad.

Loki looks at him with a confused expression. He was clearly curious.

“I’m not telling you what all this is about right now because I want it to be a surprise, but you will know soon enough, okay?” 

One blink with a small smile.

Tony stayed a while longer, then went on his way, he still had a lot of work to do.

He would usually order everything online. But he needed to get out so he would go out to get the supplies. 

He had been talking with Pepper filling her in on everything, she said she wanted to meet Loki. She would soon but he really didn’t want to overwhelm the poor guy.

She had given him pointers on what things he should buy for him. He ended up having to just take her with him. At least for the supplies for the room.

Pepper had ended up buying his clothes for him. Once she got his measurements and colors he liked. The measurements were’t perfect because Loki wouldn’t let them touch him to take them, so they will be a bit too big.

She had gone that day after work to a clothing store. She got whatever he would need using Tony’s card to purchase it. 

She came back a few hours later, having to get help to bring everything up. They put it all in the room Tony picked, it had a large closet to put everything in.

Pepper had bought a lot of green t-shirts, funny ones, normal ones, blank ones, she bought some black shirts too, dress shirts polo shirts, funny saying, more blank ones, there were also the same in gray and blue, she had than gotten some pants she hauled out some jeans in normal colors, some regular sweatpants, and shorts.

When she pulled out a sleek leather jacket Tony raised an eyebrow in question, she shrugged and said she bought what she thought he would like and would look good. Tony had smiled and shaken his head. She pulled out some sunglasses, she had bought a few different types. She left them in the box they came in and placed them on the dresser.

She pulled out a baseball cap and a flat hat, one was green and the other was black, she took out socks and underwear.

She took out some hoodies, in all different colors, of course, that Loki said he liked.

Once done Tony asked her if she would be willing to go shopping with him tomorrow, thankfully she said yes. 

What would he do without her


	18. shopping spree

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony and pepper go shopping.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to thank anyone who has been giving me tips, but a special thanks to Ikago for the help you've been great and have helped a lot. I have six chapters already edited but will post all the edited chapters at once.

The next day Tony and Pepper set off for the mall first. Tony made sure to bring his list with him.

It was a lengthy list. With it he would only need to make one trip. After he had decided to bring a bigger truck to hold it all in. especially since he would have to stop at a few shops other than the ones in the mall.

Tony was fairly certain that Loki wouldn’t hurt anyone even after he was healed so he wanted the room to look good. He would also need to gut the old room. Which he would usually hire someone to do. This time he wanted everything to be done just so, so he would be doing most of the work himself.

He would have to get help bringing up the boxes and potting them into the room but the rest he would do himself. but would likely do some extra modifications to some things like he usually does.

So as he parked as close as possible he asked Pepper to read the list and see if he missed anything. Hoping he hadn’t thought he did but it was almost always good to get another person to look at it for you too.

He waited patiently for her to finish reading the list.

“I can’t see anything missing here. We may when we get into the stores to look around,” she said handing Tony back the list.

He nodded and hopped out of the truck.

His first stop was the art store. As usual he had no idea what he would need. They wandered around aimlessly until someone approached them, asking if they needed help with something.

With the employee’s help, they ended up with home high-quality paints, leads, markers, notebooks, pencils, pens, sketchbooks, and paintbrushes. He had needed a couple of bags and it was already pretty expensive. Not that that really mattered to him, it was nothing for him.

The next store was a bookstore. He had asked Loki what types of books he likes. The god had just shrugged and blinked yes to anything. He bought a few interesting looking books, just to start him off. Tony would take him with him for the next trip to get more.

Once returning to the truck again they made their way to a random store that had a map in the front window. He needed a map and hopefully a desk globe. He found a large wall map that he would be able to scratch the first layer off so he knows where he had been. They also found the globe. Which Tony knew exactly what he wanted to do, he also got an atlas, and left the store with a grin.

Next, he found an electronics store. Honestly, he could just make the stuff at home. He wanted everything to look good as well, though.

He picked up a phone, a set of overhead headphones, a set of earbuds, an adapter for the phone, a set of speakers, a cd player, a small camera, and a desk laptop.

On the next trip back he found a music store. There he picked up a couple of CDs and records. 

He found the instrument music store and picked up an acoustic guitar, a guitar stand, a black leather strap, a bunch of different types of picks, and a tuner. He also picked up an electric piano as well. If Loki didn’t use it Tony would. He also picked up an electric guitar and an amp for them as well. He didn’t know if Loki would like how loud an electric guitar is, he also picked up some extra strings.

He ended up picking up a record player as well.

At the time he also considered buying a set of electric drums. With it he would be able to plug in the headphones and play quietly. But ended up getting dragged away by Pepper.

If Loki liked the piano and guitar he would get the drums as well. 

They went to a paint shop picking up some light green paint, black paint, and white paint.

He picked up some more books on the earth and the solar system. Along with some random movies that had been a pivoting point for the human race. Along with some Disney style movies, and some happier movies, he didn’t get anything horror in case it triggered Loki.

He picked up a poster on chords for the guitar, and a book on learning it along with the piano. Some classical music, and pop tunes. Mainly to listen to to hear the instruments.

He stopped to get a hairbrush, toothbrush, mouthwash, shampoo, body wash, a razor, nail clippers, and some jell.

Tony noticed that unlike any other Asgardians he met Loki had short hair. If he wanted to grow it out that was fine but maybe he preferred it short. Tony would have to ask at some point. Right now he really couldn’t. 

They soon ran out of the needed things in the mall. He still needed to go to a furniture store though. Along with somewhere to get some wood, plaster, and metal, along with some soundproofing material. He wanted to add a small room off Loki’s room to put the instruments in.

Ikea is the first place they went on their trip, they got a new queen bed, it was black with storage underneath. Bookshelves, a dresser, and two nightstands, some lamps, a desk light, a computer chair, and desk. He bought a stool and storage unit for the music room.

And just for kicks, he went to build a bear and made a soft stuffed black cat, with a shirt on. A gift for loki that he would give to Loki once he got back to the tower. 

Along the way, he picked up some pillows and a black and green striped bedspread.

They loaded up the truck. It had been a good idea to take one with a storage unit. Luckily there was still enough room to get the wood and metal, and soundproofing fabric.

So he stopped at the nearest shop to find some foam, he got blue foam and put it in the back. 

He stopped at home depot on the way back. Picking up plaster, plastering tools, 2x4’s, jip rock, finishing nails, framing nails, screws of all sorts, metal sheets, lightbulbs, paint rollers, and some paintbrushes for painting rooms.

He also picked up a door and doorknob. Making sure it was wide enough for Loki’s chair to fit through.

He would also need some electrical supplies. Just wires, some more outlets, running up some lights, more basic than the electrical in his suits. He also picked up some merits and some electric tape.

He was glad to be done when he loaded everything into the truck. There was some glee in getting ready for his project. He had big plans for this room, he knew where everything was going to be and he knew Loki should be released soon. After all he had regained a little weight already. He hopefully would very soon get the neck brace off.

He thanked Pepper and made sure to tell her that she would soon be able to see Loki. 

He started to unload everything to the right floor sending someone up with the first load to move the items out then tell Jarvis to send down the elevator. They would just put it to the side, and Tony would move it to the right room.

It took a nice few loads but they did it. Tony gave the employee some extra money for the help and went on to move everything to the room right next to Loki’s.


	19. Tony the builder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony sets up Loki's room

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, you can skip the second half of this chapter. It doesn't really matter to the storyline. I only put it in because carpentry is my dream job.

There was still a lot of work to do. He would need to partially rip down a wall and build a whole nother room. Not that it would take very long. It was just going to be a pain.

He had all the tools he would need down in the lab. He wanted to go get some food first. It was lunch now. He wondered if Loki had had lunch yet. 

So he made himself a sandwich and grabbed one of the shakes. That’s all the guy could eat right now so Tony bought as many different flavors as he could get his hands on.

Loki seemed to like the chocolate ones best. His other favorite is strawberry. 

He had just grabbed a random one. Looking at the label it was the vanilla one. He grabbed a straw on the way out and made his way to the elevator.

When he got to the medbay he saw that doctor Jones was with Loki. The god was half sat up with his shirt off and she was wrapping bandages around his torso. Loki’s eyes were screwed shut in pain.

He walked in as she finished up and helped Loki slip his shirt back on. Than helped to get Loki’s arm back in the sling.

“Good news your back is starting to heal nicely. You should also soon be able to get the neck brace off.” She said with a smile Loki smiles back at her.

“Has he eaten lunch yet?” He asked. Holding up the shake. Loki blinked no.

“No. He hasn’t yet I was just going to get that.” She said smiling. 

Tony hands Loki the shake. His left hand was getting better and he could hold things himself now. He smiled at Tony silently thanking him.

He still drank it like it was the last thing he’d ever eat. And he may think it may be. but if Tony had anything to do with it he’d eat whatever he wants when he wants.

They all stayed and talked for a half-hour then Tony excused himself from the conversation. He had too much work to do to stick around too much.

He went to the lab to grab his tools, a drill, a hammer, a saw, a grinder, a screwdriver, alan keys. just about any other tools you could think of along with a trolly to bring the boxes into the right rooms.

He took the elevator up and unloaded all the tools placing them on the old bed. He went to the other room and took the wood and metal with him. Then he saw the box for the globe and cat, he needed to bring the globe down to the lab. and the cat to Loki.

He placed the metal and wood in Loki’s room. Taking the elevator down to the lab placing the globe on the table. He then went back to Loki.

He held the box behind his back as he approached the god. He had a smile on his face. Tony hoped he would like it. Unfortunately he may not.

Once Loki spotted him he smiled at him. Dr. Jones was gone right now so he wouldn’t have to explain himself right away. He had a reputation to uphold.

“I have a gift for you bud.”

He held up the box placing it on the chair in Loki’s view. He pulled out the stuffed cat and walked over to Loki.

Loki looked up at him. Confusion clear in his eyes.

“It’s a stuffed cat. From what I’ve heard from Thor you’re similar to a cat. they can be very quiet when they want to be. They are mischievous. Thor told me you’re the god of mischief so I thought it would be perfect for you. Do you like it?” Tony asked awkwardly. Scratching the back of his neck. Once he had started he couldn’t stop the flow of words flowing out of his mouth.

Loki was smiling. Tears shone in his eyes as he blinked yes. He wiped the tears away and Tony handed him the toy. Smiling.

Loki held it in his good hand and lifted it to rub against his face. He closed his eyes.

Once Tony slipped away again he went to Loki’s room he wanted to take everything out of the room. He Would donate it to a shelter or something cause everything was still in really good shape. So as he took everything out of the room he brought it down to the truck. Once he was done he would bring it to a shelter.

Once the room was empty, he covered the hardwood floor with a tarp. He would wash and paint over the gray walls. He slipped an N95 respirator on and took a sledgehammer to the jip rock. tearing a random portion of the wall out. It leads to an empty room so having the wall there wasn’t going to disturb anything.

Once he was finished and the room was covered in a thick layer of dust. Only then did he take the mask off. He smiled. A part of him loved to destroy things. He found it stress relieving.

He measured the length of the wall and the width of the hole. Then he thought about how long the room would need to be to accommodate a wheelchair.

Once he finished drawing out the dimensions. He started to saw the wood and nailed it all together. He built one wall. He built the next wall. and finished the wall with the door. Once that was finished. Which had taken only two hours because he knew exactly what he had to do and how much wood to cut up.

Screwing it together had been the harder part, but he got it down.

Next was the easy part of cutting the jip rock. You measured cut and taped it so it came apart. Then used jip rock screws to put it in place. He ran the electricity between the walls and through the ceiling which had been a huge pain. He now had two outlets, a light switch, and a light. He plastered and waited for it to set and he would sand it tomorrow. After that he called it a night he would have time to finish it tomorrow. He would have to take a tv from a bedroom and set it up in the room.

Once he woke up the next morning. Grabbed a coffee and set back to work. Sanding the plaster and putting the door on. He would paint the room later.

He took the tarp up and vacuumed the dust. He grabbed the paint next. Painting the whole room green. The door and molding was black. The music room is blue, with white molding.

He put the foam up on the wall. Only after putting on a second coat and letting it dry.

He took the metal down to the lab. He heated it and shaped it so it could fit the wheels of the wheelchair he did this two more times. It would make it impossible for the chair to roll backward when Loki didn’t want to move. He would take the pieces out of the floor and put those in. Keeping the pieces so when the wheelchair was no longer needed he could put them back in the floor.

He took the pieces back to the room placing them on the floor.

He cut the floor with his own special tool and removed the pieces. He slipped them in a bag and would keep them in the lab. 

Next. he slipped the metal in.

Once that was done. He got the bed assembled. It was easy and he set it up in the center of the back wall. Enough room for the bedside tables and bookshelves. 

He got the nightstands next. With the lamps. Setting them by the sides of the bed plugging in the lamps. Setting them on the tables.

He had picked up a bunch of storage units and the bookshelves. One was designed to be a seat by the window. So Loki could read in the natural light.

He set the bookshelves up. They went all the way to the ceiling on both sides with a set of shelves between the two bookshelves. Made to look like it was hanging over the bed. He had to anchor them to the wall.

The shelving on the other wall had doors on them. He could store anything he wanted in them. He put the record player and records in one and the radio and CDs in the other. 

He put the desk in the corner so Loki could lean on it when in the window seat. It was a big desk with drawers and cubbies on either side. He put the laptop and would be putting the globe on the desk.

He put the books on the shelves, the CDs movies in storage space. And set the tv up.

The camera was stored in a cubby on the desk. Speakers to the sides of the desk. headphones, and earbuds in the desk.

In the music room. He put the guitar in a corner. With the piano in the corner hinged to the wall. It could flip up or down. Taking the picks, strap, tuners, and putting them in the storage unit next to the door

He had finished the globe that night. He tinkered with it adding lights and voice-activated lights. Loki would say the name of a place and the light for that area would light up.

He put it on the desk away from the computer.

He put the map up on the wall next to the closet. Putting a handle on the wall next to the bed to make it easier to move from his chair to the bed.

He made the bed and put the chair and stool in the music room. They were away from the notches in the floor. He did the same with the computer chair.

The wheelchair was going to be collapsible. So anytime Loki needed it he could go to the cubby by the bookshelf and grab it. When he could start trying to walk again but would still be weak. So he may need to have it nearby. The door to the cubby slid open and closed for easy access.

The room had its own bathroom. Tony put all the items he purchased in there and hung up the clothes.

Placing the sunglasses on the dresser when he brought it in. He put pants and shirts in there for now. With the underclothes.

With a last few finishing touches. Tony stepped back to admire his work. And could honestly say that he was proud of it.


	20. progressing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki finally gets his neck brace off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this chapter is early. I'm going out for the night tomorrow and won't get the time to post it.

It had been a week since Tony finished Loki’s room. Slowly Loki was getting better. Tony knew in a few more days Loki could leave the medbay.

Loki just needed to get the brace off. He had superhuman healing abilities. But his muscle mass would take a long time to regain.

When he had modified the wheelchair he had put a tracker on the wheelchair. Just so he knows where he is if he needs help.

So he brought down Loki’s breakfast as he had been for a couple of days. This one was Loki’s favorite, chocolate.

When he got there he saw that the god was sitting peacefully. Watching the small tv Tony had brought him. Holding his stuffed companion.

“He Lokes you feeling any better?” Tony asked. Quietly. He learned that when first starting to talk to Loki you want to have a softer tone so you don’t startle him.

Even with the soft tone Loki still jumped a little. Eyes darting to the location of the sound. He relaxed again when he saw Tony. A small smile gracing his lips.

Tony held up the shake opening it as usual and slipping the straw in. Handing it to Loki. Who took it gently.

They sat in comfortable silence for a while just relaxing. Tony was excited to be able to actually hear Loki’s voice. He wondered if it would be deep like Thor’s or softer than Thors.

Honestly. He hoped Loki wasn’t loud and obnoxious like Thor usually was. Though he doubted he would be. Not after everything he was put through.

But maybe with enough time, he could bring some of the old Loki back out. Maybe he could heal parts of Loki. Parts that Loki himself thought to shattered to repair.

When he had first met Loki. He thought he was just another criminal sent to destroy or rule the earth. But the starving, scared, weak man he found had quickly become a priority to him.

Currently Tony was working on some leg braces. Hopefully, that would correctly distribute Loki’s weight so he could walk properly again.

His fingernails were slowly growing back now. And healing. His right hand was still a very different story. It was barely healing by now.

And really Tony knows he has to be patient. Really patience has never been one of his traits. He rushes around when there is no reason to be rushing around. It helps keeps his self-destructive thoughts at bay.

Not too long later the silence is broken by the sounds of someone approaching them. Loki must have recognized the footsteps because he looked up with a small smile.

It never ceased to amaze him that Loki could still be positive. When he got back he didn’t think he would be happy ever again. That the torture from his own mind would continue forever.

Dr. Jones greeted both of them when she entered the room.

“I think that your neck is better. Your scans just got back. Your neck is just about healed. So I think I can take the brace off. This also means you will be able to talk and eat real food,” She says smiling as Loki perked up. Smiling that smile that just lights up the whole room. The one that chases the darkness away.

Once the brace was off she touched around his bruised neck. He winced and tried to pull back but only succeeded in pushing himself into the bed.

“I know it hurts I’m sorry,” She says softly but continues her prodding.

“Everything Looks okay. The bruising should heal soon. But I’d like to test your speech. I just want you to say your full name and where you’re from. Can you do that for me?” she asked with pleading eyes.

Loki nods opening his mouth to speak but only a short wheeze comes out. 

He tries again “My name- My name is- is Loki Odinson and I’m from- I’m from Asgard.” he weakly pushes out, voice rough from lack of use.

“My name is Loki Odinson and I’m from Asgard,” he repeats more clearly this time.

“Good job. Your voice will start to return the more you talk. But if you don’t feel comfortable you don’t have to.” Dr, Jones says. She wants him to know that this is a safe place.

Loki smiles and nods “Thank you,” he says softly.

Both Tony and Dr. J just smile fondly.

Loki’s voice was supposed to be his greatest weapon. But the people before Shield had taken the time to sew his mouth shut. 

Tony looks at Loki. Smiling brightly. Loki locks eyes with him briefly before looking down. Ever since he arrived on earth. He hadn’t met anyone’s eyes for more than a second or two.

“Why won’t you look at me?” Tony asks. Just curious if Loki didn’t answer the question it wouldn’t be a big deal.

But for Loki. It was a big deal. Was this a test? Was he supposed to answer verbally? All he knew was that this is what Thanos had beat into him every day. He knows the answer to this question.

“Because one is not supposed to meet eyes with someone of higher power or authority than them. Because someone as low as I shouldn’t make eye contact with someone of higher status ” He answers. Not really even thinking about it. This is what he was taught.

For Tony it was like a punch to the gut. Who would say that to another person. To make them think that lowly of themself.

“Hey. We aren’t like whoever told you that. Because you didn’t deserve anything you went through. You aren’t lower than anyone else here. Whoever said that to you was wrong. Here you can look at whoever or whatever you want. We aren’t going to hurt you. I promise,” Tony says. He knows full well that it’s going to take more than just a few words to fix the damage. But it was a start.

Loki didn’t respond. Didn’t move or make any sign that he heard Tony.

So they sank back into that silence. just sitting there.

“Thank you for letting me rest here. As soon as I’m well I promise to leave you in peace.” Loki suddenly spoke.

Tony frowned “You’re welcome to stay as long as you want. I have a room set up for you and everything. I want you to stay here with me. I like having people here.” Tony says. Hoping to get through to the god.

“Thank you, I appreciate that more than you may know,” Loki says. His voice is gentle. With a hint of British accent seeping into his voice.

Tony smiles at him.

Not even ten minutes later there is a rumble and that scent of ozone seeps into the air.

“Sir. It seems Mr. Odinson has landed on the penthouse balcony. He seems to be looking for you.” Jarvis informs him.


	21. Serious conversations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor and Tony have a talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey y’all enjoy your snack.

“Shit” Tony mumbled. Sure he wanted Thor to know that Loki was back. But he also didn’t want to overwhelm Loki.

Looking over he had seen that Loki had paled. Left hand clutching the bedsheet. Heart rate through the roof. Tony couldn’t imagine what was going through his head right now.

“Hey. It’s okay. He’s not going to hurt you. I can promise that no one is going to hurt you anymore. I'm not going to let anyone hurt you.” Tony says with a reassuring smile. 

“I’m going to go up and talk to him. Then if you want I’ll let him come down. It's fully up to you. But just so you know I will be there the whole time.” He said. Loki nodded.

Tony smiled and turned to leave.

\--------------------

Once he was in the penthouse he spotted Thor on the couch.

“Friend stark. I apologize for my absence. Asgard has been fighting for peace in the nine.” Thor nearly yelled. Tony had to fight not to wince. No way Thor could just go down with Loki. He would scare him.

“It’s all good I’ve had a pretty eventful two weeks myself. I need to talk with you though. So what did you need me for?” Tony asks. Wanting to get right to the point.

“I was informed by Heimdal. When I returned he had seen my brother. Here. I want you to keep an eye out for him. He will pose no threat if he hasn’t changed. He has never been a violent god.” Thor says. Looking down with a frown.

“Please. I beg of you stark if you see him. Do not harm him. No one other than him knows where he was. Hela has not stopped searching since his disappearance. Bringing him back could help put our family back together again.” Thor pleads.

“You know that I out of all the Avengers wouldn’t hurt someone innocent.” Tony says.

“I don’t think he will look the same. But he has a way with words that got us out of many situations. He is also mischievous. He will not harm your earth.” Thor says. Barely giving Tony any chances to speak.

“If you find him would you promise to inform me as soon as possible? So I can return him to Asgard?” Thor asks. blue eyes wide.

“Of course. Is that all from you?” Tony asks. He needed to get his point across, that his topic was very important.

“It is.” Thor says shifting slightly in his seat.

“Okay. well. It seems that we have a common topic because I found Loki two weeks ago.” Tony starts. He didn’t exactly know how to tell the god of thunder that the brother he thought dead for so long was alive.

Thor nodded eyes wide.

“I found him in the shield heli carrier. He is in bad shape.” Tony says sadly.

“What. Is he okay?” Thor asks.

“No Thor. He Looks like he hasn’t been fed in a year. His muscle mass is non-existent. His back is marred from a whip. A shoulder is dislocated. And his hand is horribly broken. When he got here his mouth was fucking sewn shut. With his windpipe nearly crushed.” Tony nearly yelled the last part. anger coursing through his veins.

“I must see my brother stark.” Thor says urgently.

“Not right now Thor. I have to make sure he is okay to have another person with him. You have to speak quietly. You will scare him if you run in there yelling. No fast or sudden movements. Don’t expect him to look you in the eyes or hold a conversation with you.” Tony says wanting to get his point across.

Thor nods.

“Look he’s not going to be the same person you remember. He's really traumatized. He is scared. Has been tortured for god only knows how long.” Tony says Looking Thor in the eyes.

“And before you go in there. He doesn’t look like how you described him. He has scars all over his face and is covered in bruises. He has a sling on to support his shoulder.” Tony recalls too Thor.

“He’s also not going anywhere until he can walk again. He needs to rest without the stress. A trip through the bi-frost isn’t going to help that.” Tony states firmly.

“Friends stark. I must ask a question.” Thor states.

“Gods can’t die from starvation. As soon as he landed was he given attention and food?” Thor asks.

It’s a reasonable question. Tony also knows that this could end in a murderous rampage, not that it matters to tony.

“No. When he first got here. Two of the most ruthless agents got their hands on him. They tortured him for another two weeks before I got the call from Shield to take over.” Tony bites out.

Thor’s hand on his hammer visibly tightens. Rage floods his blue eyes.

“What are the names of the two men who did this to my brother. If I can’t get to my brother’s worst enemy then anyone who hurt him will pay.” Thor grinds out.

“Williams and Smith. I can give you pictures. Right now Loki is going to need you by his side. He may not trust you right away but you need to give him time.” Tony mumbles the fist part. Then firmly states the last part.

“Fine. But once my sister arrives here. There will be no stopping it.” Thor says. Features softening.

“Honestly I’m not mad about it. After what they did to him they deserve it. I’ll go back down and make sure Loki wants visitors. You stay here and wait. Remember to be quiet if he wants to see you.” Tony says as he turns on his heel walking towards the elevator. Not even waiting to hear Thor’s answer.

Once he got there he saw that Loki was still tense on the bed. Though his heart rate had improved.

“Hey. So I just spoke to your brother. He wants to see you. Can he come down? He’s been worried about you. It’s why he came here. Apparently Heimdal saw you at some point. I don’t think he’ll leave if he doesn’t get to see you.” Tony says a smirk on his face.

Loki seemed to think about it.

“If you don’t want him to. I won’t let him down. it’s up to you.” Tony says.

At last. Loki nods his consent. Tony smiles. This was progress. That would help.


	22. reunited

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor and Loki reunite

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> enjoy your snacks boi's

Once he arrived at the top floor Tony stepped out of the elevator. He hoped this didn’t trigger anything in Loki’s brain. God knows he has enough problems right now.

Tony knew that nightmares are going to be a problem for a long time. considering he still has them a lot of the time. Not that he would admit that to anyone. He had a reputation to uphold.

“God news point break. He said it’s fine to go down. Remember to keep your voice down. No sudden movements. Unless he brings it up. Do not talk about his time in captivity. Do you understand?” Tony asked.

“Yes. Does he remember us? Has he said anything to you?” Thor asked. Voice at a reasonable level.

“Well he knows you at least. He wrote his name when I found him. Then he panicked when I asked if he was your brother. So he at least knows you. If he starts having a panic attack I’ll need you to take a step back and let me get it under control,” Tony states. He’d always been a bit of a control freak. But this was important.

“And he hasn’t spoken since he arrived here. He only was able to speak today. So anything he says is new to me.” Tony says. 

Thor nods and they make their way to the elevator. The ride was silent until the doors opened.

They go to the room Tony looks at Thor holding his finger to his lips. A serious look plastered on his face.

Thor nods. Frowning. How bad of a state was his brother in.

“Hey Loki it's just us. Thor is right behind me. Is it still okay for us to come in?” Tony asks quietly.

Loki nods. He hasn’t spoken since he had to talk earlier.

“Okay. Perfect. Remember if at any point you want us to leave. I will make him leave,” Tony says as they walk in.

Loki looked nothing like he had when he was on Asgard. He was always small but he looked far too small here. Too skinny, too pale.

“Brother. I’m so glad to see you,” was all Thor could say. He was never good with words. Unlike his brother. Who up to this point hadn’t spoken a word. 

Loki smiled at Thor. Tears in his eyes. Since he got here. His thoughts had become more clear. He knew now some of what was true and what was false. Like Thor did actually love him.

Thor got closer on Loki’s signal. He slowly sat in the chair beside him.

“Loki it's been eight years. Everyone is going to be so happy to have you back. We missed you so dearly,” Thor said. His voice cracked heavy with emotion.

“It feels like longer than that brother,” Loki said sadly. His voice was still raw.

“Do you want something to drink Loki,” Tony asks Loki nods. Tony got up. Partly sensing they wanted some time alone. 

“I called out for you brother. You and Hela and anyone else I knew. But no one came. I thought father put me there,” Loki said once Tony left.

“Father would never do that to you brother. He told Heimdal to never stop searching for you. We all thought you dead,” Thor said. Tears flowing down his face.

“I don’t know what’s real and fake anymore. They changed my memories. They showed me attacking Midgard. I am nearly certain that is false but am I correct?” Loki asked. He needed to know if he truly committed such a crime.

“No brother. That was not you. The person who attacked Midgard was one of Thanos’ henchmen,” Thor says.

“Thor. Does Asgard still stand?” Loki asked although he still had yet to look at Thor.

“Yes. Loki and when you are healed you are welcome to come back home. We have missed you dearly,” Thor says.

“Can I come back to visit? and help your friends? I have enjoyed my time here.” Loki whispered.

“You can come here as often as you’d like. You will be able to do what you want,” Thor says. what had Loki’s captors done to him. To turn him into this scared man.

“Thor. Did I kill my biological father?” Loki asked tears flowing down his face.

“Brother. Your father is in Jotunheim. As is your mother, and sibling. They are alive and well,” Thor says. He would answer any questions his brother had. It was his responsibility now.

“Brother. Can you come here?” Loki asks. Looking at him for the first time. With those wide green eyes.

Thor stands. Walking over to Loki. Who reached out to touch his beard.

“When did they cut your hair Loki?” Thor asked. He knew very well that Loki likes his hair long. He always had.

“When they first took me. I fought it at first. But it was too hard to fight it after. You probably think I’m a coward. Not fighting,” Loki says looking down.

“I think you are unbelievably strong for going through all of this. And come out alive. You are truly amazing. I have never thought you weak,” Thor says.

“I hated that I ran out of magic so soon. I thought my magic was unlimited. After a short time. It ran out. I was left too weak to fight back,” Loki says. Sadly.

If this was Loki from before he would have said that bitterly. Not sadly.

“Loki you are not weak. You are the strongest person I know. Your magic will return in time when you heal it will start building up again. You need to give it some time,” Thor says. Loki had always been impatient. Always living in the fast lane.

“Thor I know you haven’t done this since we were children. But will you lay with me?” Loki asks. shifting onto his good shoulder to make room for Thor.

“Of course Lok. Anything you need. I will be here for as long as you need,” Thor says. Glad he switched to his Midgardian clothes before coming here. He just wore loose jeans. A soft shirt and sweater.

As soon as he was on his shoulder Loki curled into him. Just as he did when they were children. And Loki had a bad dream. He was always plagued with them. Likely due to his overactive mind.

They didn’t talk as Thor listened to his lost brothers breathing. He had gotten so small Thor was scared to touch him. In case he broke him.

Slowly Loki fell asleep. Clutching Thor’s shirt in one hand. Head on his chest.

“Holy crap,” was all Tony could say. He entered the room nearly dropping the glass of water.

“What is it friend Stark,” Thor asked with a questioning look.

“You have to stay if you can do this,” Tony says. Placing the cup on the table. Then sitting back down in his place.

This was so good. If Loki needed someone he trusted with him to sleep and without medicine. Tony would make Thor stay.

“Do what?” Thor asked. That answer hadn’t been helpful at all. If anything it only made him more confused.

“Thor, Loki hasn’t slept without medicine. Since he got here. Then you come here. And he falls right to sleep,” Tony says. A small smile spread across his face.


	23. streching his wings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki leaves his bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going back to school soon! unfortunately, That means I may not get as much time to write :( but I'll try and keep up.

Loki had spoken to Thor for hours after he awoke again. Trying to clear his thoughts. Although things were still foggy. Memories were returning to him.

He was certain that Asgard hadn’t fallen. He hadn’t murdered his father. Hadn’t attacked Midgard. That his fathers love him. Both his mothers are alive. Hela was raised with him.

And the other day he had been given soup by Tony. It was the first hot thing he had eaten since his capture. The amazing flavor had lingered in his mouth after.

Thor has stayed with him during the nights. 

He had stayed with Thor when he was younger and had nightmares. Or couldn’t sleep. As he grew he had stopped. Mainly because it was an unusual thing to do for someone of his age and status.

But now. He didn’t even think about it. He asked Thor. Who for some reason didn’t mind staying with him. He even seemed to enjoy it.

For the first time in what felt like a lifetime. He was warm. Wasn’t in a lot of pain. Just his back and arm hurt the worst right now. Along with his head but that was getting better too. He was with people that didn’t hurt him. And he was happier. He was scared when Thor left. He knows the nightmares are going to start again.

Thor sat in the chair beside Loki. They sat in comfortable silence. Just listening to the beep of the machines.

More than anything though. He longed to move. He wanted to go somewhere. To leave this room. Don’t get him wrong he was glad to be away from everything and everyone that wanted to hurt him. At the same time. It had been so long since he felt the air on him or was allowed to go anywhere.

But he wouldn’t say anything. He was too grateful and afraid to say anything about it. What if Tony wouldn’t let him stay anymore.

He liked it here. But this couldn’t be permanent. Once Tony inevitably had enough of him he would kick him out. Or give him back to the people from before.

It would be better than if he had to go back to Thanos. Just the thought made his heart pick up. Making his chest ache.

“Brother. Are you okay?” Thor asked. Concerned at the distant look. The pained expression.

Loki nodded. It was a lie. But he didn’t want to have to explain his worries. He still didn’t talk unless he needed to get his point across. So Tony and Thor usually asked yes or no questions.

“It is going to be okay. Maybe not today. Probably not even tomorrow. But it will start to get better,” Thor spoke softly.

When had Thor gotten so wise? Maybe his experiences have aged him more. Loki thought. A small smile on his lips.

He had missed his family at the beginning the most. As time went on he didn’t have the will to think. Just escaping to the empty parts of his mind.

Another thing. He wasn’t too tired anymore. He still got headaches when he thought too hard. But he missed his books. His ears weren’t as sensitive as they used to be. So he missed listening to music. Overall he missed when things were normal. 

A part of him wondered if anything would be normal again? If he would be normal again? If he could go back to a time where just looking at someone didn’t make the wave's of anxiety wash over him? When he could talk to someone without feeling like his heart was going to beat out of his chest?

He wanted to be able to go back when it wasn’t hard to remember what memories were real and what wasn’t.

\-----------------------

Two hours later Tony and Dr. Jones walked in. A smile on Tonys and the doctor’s face.

Today Loki was getting out of his bed. Even though he would have to come back regularly for check-ups. He wouldn’t have to stay in one place anymore.

Tony had tinkered with a wheelchair. It now had two settings. One was a manual chair. The other was motorized. Right now he could choose and Loki likely would be using the motorized one.

They would help him. But he wanted to make sure Loki was ready. He didn’t want to rush things.

So they had food. While he was eating. Someone would go get the chair that is placed outside the room.

They had some soup again. This time a different flavor. Beef. It was just broth but god was he so happy with it.

Loki took it slower this time. He still ate too fast. But it was natural. As time passed hopefully the habit would stop. So he would become more trusting. For now. They would just have to be patient.

“Hey bud. I have something for you. Do you want to see?” Tony asks once Loki sets down the bowl.

Loki nods. A small smile paints his pale face.

Tony stepped out of the room grabbing the chair and rolled it in.

Loki eyed it as he rolled it into the room.

“First of all. You’re under no pressure to leave this room. Dr. Jones said you can leave if you want. So I made you this to help you get around since you can’t walk properly,” Tony says patting the chair.

Against his own thoughts. And even though he thought this was a trap and a horrible idea. He slowly nodded.

“Goodman. Let’s do this,” Tony said smiling wide. He hoped he would want to get in. But he didn’t want to push. (pun fully intended.)

Tony lowered the bar on the bed. Loki moved to help Tony. He moved lower on the bed until he could turn. So his legs would hang off the side.

Before Tony could slip his arm under Loki’s shoulder. He pushed himself off the bed. His feet landed. And for a few seconds he was able to hold himself up. Then his knees buckled. Tony just caught him. 

“Jesus. Calm down. You’re gonna hurt yourself worse if you keep this up,” Tony says slightly amused.

“Sorry,” Loki quickly says. Trying stand up again.

“It’s okay. I’m sure you’re ready to get out of here,” Tony says.

They moved to the chair. Where Dr. Jones had locked the wheels in place.

Once seated Loki rubbed his left hand over the seat smiling.

Tony showed him how to use the chair. How to change the setting. How to move it in powered mode. How to manually lock the brake.

“Now that you can use your chair. I have just one more question,” Tony says.

Loki looked at him. Dread evident on his face.

“All good. All good. I just wanted to ask if you wanted to see your room?”


	24. showing off

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony takes Loki on a tour of the penthouse and Loki's room.

*READ CHAPTER NOTES*

“Do you want to see your room?” Tony asked. He so hoped Loki would but he knew he was moving fast.

That look of dread was wiped away. A confused look took over.

“I set it up while you were here a few days ago,” Tony explained.

Loki relaxed. Looked down at his lap. Slowly he nodded.

Tony took hold of the handles. Wanting to direct Loki the first time. The wheelchair lurched forward and Loki jump’s and relaxed again.

Tony smirks from his position. Part of him knows it shouldn’t be amused by the god’s fear. But the poor guy is so tense.

They walked to the elevator. Tony gently pushing the tense god.

He placed a hand gently on his shoulder. He feels Loki tense more. “Calm down. No one is going to hurt you. And the chair isn’t gonna hurt you,” Tony says with a slightly amused tone.

Loki still wouldn’t relax. Honestly Tony felt bad so he had to stop.

Loki briefly looked up. Confused.

“Can you give us a minute? We’ll meet you up there.” Tony asked. Looking between Thor and Dr. Jones.

They nod stepping into the elevator.

Once the door closed Tony locked the brakes and stepped away to grab a nearby chair.

He dragged it in front of Loki. Sitting down looking at the fallen man in front of him.

“Look. I’m no good at this whole comfort thing. But I can tell you’re scared. And I’ll say this. You are safe here and no one here wants to hurt you. If someone comes here with bad intent. They’ll have to go through me, Thor, Dr. J, and the rest of my team,” Tony says. Placing a hand on Loki’s shoulder.

Loki still didn’t relax.

“Look. I know that this is going to take a while. I need you to open up to me. I can’t read minds. It's up to you. But I could help more if you let me in,” Tony states.

“And once you're better. You can stay as long as you want. I have designated floors for each Avenger. So I’ll set a floor up for you. But for now. You’re going to need help with some things. So you’re stuck with me. Okay?” Tony says.

Loki nods deflating slightly.

“Do you want to stay here? Or go up and meet up with everyone else?” Tony asked. Half hoping Loki would want to go meet everyone up.

“We can go,” was all Loki trusted himself to say.

Tony nods. Laying his chair back where it was. Retaking his position behind the wheelchair again.

Loki pushes the button to call the elevator. Tony presses the button for the right floor. 

Once the group meets up again Tony leads the way to Loki’s room. He had picked up some extra books. Dr. Jones had said Loki had healed enough to start doing some more reading. thanks to Asgardian healing. It was still slow though.

Tony had actually asked Thor about that. He said that Loki was so weak right now that his body had slowed down. To about the same rate of a strong human. Which had made sense. He also learned that Loki could use magic. But it was all going into healing him right now and that once he had healed his magic would hopefully return to him. 

They move slow. Not wanting to jerk the chair too much and scare Loki. They were almost to the right place.

Thor pushes the door open. Loki takes over the control. Rolling himself into the room. He stops once he’s through the door. A small gasp escapes. His hand is at his mouth.

Tony takes his time showing Loki everything. Sometimes stopping to check on him. He had been crying since the start of the tour. Smiling and scanning the whole room. He particularly liked the map on his wall and the bookshelf.

“Through this door. I made a music room. You won’t be able to use any of it until your arm and hand heal. But I thought it might help you relearn to use your hands again,” Tony explained while pushing the door open.

Loki took to the acoustic guitar right away. Rolling up to it and gently strumming the strings of the instrument. Smiling at the soft sound it made.

“See these cut-outs on the floor? Okay. Well they are for you to put the chair in. It will stop you from rolling back if you forget to lock your brakes. Once you’re out of your chair I have a stool. In the other room I have a computer chair,” Tony says, smiling at Loki’s reactions.

Bringing him back out. He showed him the secret compartments under the window seat. Then how to use the electronics.

“This globe is special. You can say any name of a place on earth. And its location will light up on the globe. Give it a try,” Tony says. telling him to say one of the names in the atlas.

He chose Toronto. Saying it to the globe. The location lights up. Loki’s eyes light up with it. 

“Over here is a small cubby. You can fold your wheelchair up and place it there. So if you start only needing on certain days. You have that option. I have another place to put your chair during the night,” Tony says.

They show him the closet. And the bathroom. Once they go back to the main room Loki picks up the camera and looks at it with a confused expression.

“It’s a camera. It’s going to have pictures of the places I take you when you’re well enough,” Tony says. Smiling at Loki.

“These are headphones. They plug into the phone or this laptop. They make it so only you can hear what’s going on,” 

Soon they leave again. So they can show Loki the rest of the penthouse.

“This is the kitchen and dining room. Once we are finished with your current diet. You will have full freedom in this room. Until you put on enough weight. So your body can handle it. You'll have to be watched so you don’t make yourself sick,” Tony says.

Honestly. Loki was happy with whatever Tony was generous enough to give him.

They showed him how to use the tv. Along with what there was to watch.

Loki nods through the whole thing. Trying to wrap his head around all the buttons.

\--------------------

That night. Loki tried mashed potatoes and some random meat.

Honestly. He wished Loki wasn't so scared someone was going to take it from him. That would take time to erase from Loki’s traumatized mind.

Loki and Thor stayed together again that night. Only after Loki got his cat from his hospital bed. He hadn’t let the thing go since he got it.

Tony was even considering getting a cat for Loki once he was better. He seemed like the gentle motherly type. But he also seemed like a cat person.

Plus Tony had always wanted a pet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm going back to school tomorrow. unfortunately, that also means that I'm not going to have enough time to write this story and post twice a week. so I'm going to post once a week now. I was wondering what day you preferred Wednesday or Friday?


	25. exploration

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki explores his room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wednesday it is folks. hopefully, y'all enjoy it.

It had been breakfast two days later when Thor made an announcement. He was heading back to Asgard. He wanted to tell their family about Loki being alive. Maybe he would even be able to go home again soon.

He had only just left his room. Still just as tired as the night before.

He had tried to sleep alone in his room. He ended up laying awake with his own thoughts. Or roaming around his room.

He likes the thing that makes sounds with the metal strings. He thinks that Tony called it a guitar.

He had been in that room for a while. Pressing the white teeth. Some of them made pretty sounds. Others made weird noises. 

He looked in the storage unit. Only finding some small rounded triangles. All different thicknesses.

He found some books in the unit as well. One on the guitar. The other book about the thing with the white teeth. The book calls it a piano.

He found a long wide leather band. It had strings on the other end. It was long enough to wrap around his body.

He also found a small bag of metal strings for the guitar.

He wondered why he would need them if it already had them on it. 

He also wondered why these walls had a weird material on the wall. The other walls don’t have them.

Soon he moved out to the main room. Slowly looking around. He rolled over to the desk.

Running a hand over the globe with a smile on his face. The smooth surface was calming to him.

Rolling over to the seat by the window. He opens the door below it. He removes the record player. 

Inspecting it. Using his hands on all the surfaces. A puzzled expression.

The small shiny disks wouldn’t fit. But the big black ones may.

He wondered what would happen if he were to place one on it. So taking out a random disk. With a racing heart. He gently placed it down.

Nothing happens. He tilts his head to the side. Rotating it in his hands.

Tony told him to place the spike on the disk. Wouldn’t that damage the disk?

First. He tries to move it to the inside. It gets stuck. Then he lifts it onto it.

Still. Nothing happens. It doesn’t move as Tony had said it would. He presses some more buttons. 

The clicks are satisfying but still. Nothing happens. At this point. He’s thoroughly confused. What is it supposed to do?

He puts it back. Closes the door. And opens the next door.

He gasps. A smile forming that threatened to split his face.

In front of him was the art supplies. Gods. When was the last time he held a pencil. Before Tony on the flying base.

Taking out the pencil and paper placing it on his lap and rolling over to the desk.

He was one of the lucky few that could write with both hands. He had always loved writing a drawing. But he couldn’t do it for so long.

With his mind still like mush he could barely remember how to hold a pencil. It had been even worse on the flying base. His hand was aching. But he had learned to ignore it. To not show weakness. It never helped. Only making them torture him worse. 

His hand was getting better. Dr. Jones told him that he could get the sling off. But he had to be careful until it was strong again.

He wanted it off as soon as possible. He hated feeling weak. Like he couldn’t do anything for himself.

But for now, he was sketching a terrible version of the animal Tony got him. The pencil was shaking. So was his hand.

Once it was done. He smiled a little. He was pleased. He used to be good at drawing. He hoped it was going to be easy to get back on the horse again.

He tried again. But his hand. Even healed. Started to cramp. He had to put it away.

Moving across the room to the dresser. He noticed a pair of black lensed glasses on the top. They looked similar to the ones Tony wore.

He slipped them on but had to take them off when he couldn’t see anything. He placed them on the dresser again.

He picked up a random book off the shelf. Reading the words on the back. It was on the stars.

He flipped through it for a couple of minutes. Then placed it on the shelf again.

He felt antsy and wanted to get out. He silently rolled out of his room. He would only be out for ten minutes. No one would even notice.

He wasn’t expecting to see Tony in the kitchen. But he would smell the alcohol from the doorway.

He prayed Tony hadn’t seen him. He could sneak back to his room without anybody knowing he had even left.

“Hey, Loki,” Tony called out. Amusement clear in his voice. 

Loki cringed but rolled himself into the light.

Tony was smirking at the spot Loki had just been.

“You really are like a cat. I only knew you were there because I heard you gasp,” 

Loki looks into his lap. Blushing.

“It’s okay. You can go wherever you want if you go out on the balcony to be careful of the stairs,”

Loki nods.

“Can I get you anything?”

Loki wanted some water. But he also didn’t want to inconvenience Tony.

“If you want something to drink. There is lots to drink in the fridge. Just over there. And if you want something to eat. Let me know and I’ll make it for you,”

Loki silently goes to the fridge. He spotted some water. He suddenly felt nauseous. But he didn’t want to seem rude.

So he grabs the bottle. Inspecting it. He couldn’t open it. It had a cover on it.

Tony appeared behind him. Smiling as he took it and showed him how to open it. 

“Thank you.” 

“No problem,”

Slowly he drinks while rolling out to the balcony.

The night was absolutely beautiful. The air felt so nice.

Tears started to form in his eyes. Everything was so much. Everything meant so much.

“Hey. Loki. When was the last time you were outside?” Tony asks when he sees the tears in Loki’s eyes.

“You don’t have to answer that if you don’t want to,”

“It is okay. I think it was. Almost eight years ago. Possibly more,” Loki squeezed out.


	26. Her Arrival

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hela finally arrives. What's the next chapter in Loki's story?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, y'alls enjoy. I have some ideas for a second part to this story, how do y'all feel about a part 2,

Thor came back not too long later. He wanted to stay with his brother for as long as possible.

His sister didn’t believe him about Loki’s return and was coming later. She was just packing her things so she could stay as long as she was needed.

When he got back everyone was in the kitchen. He didn’t know if they were waiting for him or not.

Loki seemed to be improving greatly. Physically at least. He was still far too small but not like he was when he first arrived.

Loki was also eating more now. Although he had never been a good eater. He had gone years without food. Right now he was eating eggs and hashbrowns. Stark had told him that he needed more protein and fat so he would need to eat more things like eggs.

Thor just wanted his happy carefree brother back. He remembers when Loki was younger and healthier. He would cause chaos wherever he went.

Someone unknown to him had hurt his brother. Then the mortals did the same. 

No matter how long it took. Thor would defeat whoever did this to his brother. 

They had warped Loki’s once sharp mind and used it against him. Loki had always been strong and hadn’t broken even when Thor knew he would have. Thor was honestly so proud of Loki for not breaking.

While on his trip to Asgard he had spoken to his parents. They agreed on Loki staying on Midgard for some time. Hella had agreed to help him in his want for revenge and was going to help him take care of who they could find.

So when she got here they would get to the helicarrier. Than take care of the two monsters who hurt Loki when he was in SHIELD custody. 

They didn’t care who they had to take out to get to the people that are the real culprits. 

They would do whatever it takes. While it may not help Loki in every way. It would help him to know they couldn’t get at his brother again.

He hoped his sister would be here soon. He wanted to stay with Loki for as long as possible. But he also had to take care of this.

He also hopes Stark won’t ask any questions. Just in case he would he already had a plan in mind. Loki always told him to plan things out. He never started to actually listen to his advice until it was too late.

Since Loki’s death Thor had changed. He became softer, less violent, and kinder, just as Loki had been.

But he still wasn’t anything like Loki. He wasn’t mischievous like Loki was. He didn’t like to cause chaos. But above all, he didn’t mind taking someone out to protect his family.

He had spent a lot of time in Loki’s chambers after his disappearance. He looked for any clues to where Loki was. He found nothing.

He had asked people when they last saw him. Thor searched all of Asgard but never was able to find anything.

Thor had missed his brother dearly. But Hella was the most distraught. She never stopped looking for him. She used all the magic she knew to look across the galaxies. She turned up empty time and time again.

Heimdall spent much of his time searching as well. He could never see the lost prince.

Everyone lost hope and no one was really the same after everything. Loki was a vital part of Asgard. He made everything whole. He was the sweet mischievous small prince.

Loki was now scared of everything and he was weak. Thor remembers a time when Loki could do magic at a higher skill level than his own father. But now he doubted Loki could conjure something as simple as a small flame. 

But slowly he was getting better. 

Just being able to hold his brother again made Thor feel better. His brother stopped letting him touch him after he hit puberty.

But now it seemed Loki couldn’t sleep without him. It didn’t bother Thor at all. He was willing to do it as much as Loki wanted.

When Hella arrives he just knows Loki’s going to be beaming. He always had a special connection with Hella. Maybe it was her intelligence. Maybe the fact that she would always be there to listen. No one really knows.

But right now he just wants Loki to heal. With time he would. He would just need some time to build up more muscles.

While he was away Thor would get his room cleaned. He knows Loki wouldn’t want to go into his room and it is dusty or dirty.

When Thor and Loki were younger Loki was clean. Thor was always the opposite; he was the kid that would put everything he saw in his mouth.

As time passed and the morning turned to evening Thor’s excitement grew.

He had never been patient. At least he had a reason to be the way he is now.

As a rainbow beam of light shot down onto the balcony Thor smiles. finally. He guesses he can understand taking some time. But it felt like it took a long time.

“I apologize brother. I was called for a task,” Hella told him as she stepped out of the beam.

Thor was glad he wouldn’t need to give the same speech to Hella as Stark gave to him when he first arrived.

“It is okay. He doesn’t know you are here. He’s in his room at the moment,”

“Before we go in. I need to tell you a few things. Okay?”

Hella nods. Arching an eyebrow.

“Okay. So first. No loud noises. Especially when greeting him because he frightens easily. No sudden movements. So no raising a hand for what the mortals call a high five because he may think you’re going to hit him.”

“Brother how bad off is he. Who do I need to murder,”

“He’s in bad shape but he will recover. As for who we need to kill. Let's start with the two bastards who are aboard the flying base.” 

Thor tells Hella about Loki’s injuries. Leaving most of the gruesome parts out. Loki needs hella to be calm when she sees him.

She breaths and calms.

“We both need to be calm. But are you ready to go see him?”

“Of course,”


	27. revenge pt 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki and Hela reunite. Thor and Hela get revenge.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> enjoy guys. Sorry if this is of poor quality. its been a bad week for me. I'm not using that as an excuse because it's not I'm just apologizing. My best friend has been a huge help. so shout out to you if you get the chance to read this.

They made their way to Loki’s room. It wasn’t too far just a few turns.

Thor knocked on the door gently. Loki didn’t usually call out but would allow entrance after a knock.

“Brother, how are you?”

Loki smiled at him from his desk nodding.

“You have a visitor.”

Loki actually looks more, eyebrow raised. He used the stick to roll himself out of the position. 

Hela strolls in. She looks over Thor should. A small gasp is heard from both parties. For the first time since his arrival Loki chooses to look into the eyes of another.

It’s at that moment that Thor decides he’s going to gut anyone who hurt Loki.

Hela rushes around Thor and gathers Loki into her arms. Loki is just as eager to give her a hug to.

They held each other for what seemed like hours, both crying but so happy.

Thor hadn’t seen hela this happy since before Loki’s disappearance 

“I missed you so much Loki.” Hela whispers into Loki’s ear during the hug. Loki breaks down at that. Shaking while sobs escape. 

Thor feels his eyes watering from his spot in the room. The two have been so lost lately. Loki needs a support system around him. Hela had become much darker since Loki’s disappearance. Every time she returned she became more and more sad and angry. Up till this point he had rarely seen her smile.

They look at each other. Both look completely different. Hela had worn darker clothes and grown out her hair way longer than when they last saw each other. She had also become slimmer. Loki was smaller with much shorter hair.

“What did they do to your hair brother?” Hela asks running a hand through what little hair he did have.

“It's not that bad. I’ve grown used to it.” Loki says with a lopsided smile. 

“His hair has grown since his return sister.” Thor says.

“It has. I am growing it back out.” Loki says in his usual voice. The one from before his kidnapping. The one when he felt like a prince.

“Are you hungry sister? Loki is on a schedule for eating.”

Hela nods. She hadn’t eaten that day too nervous for what she would see today.

They ate and watched the moving pictures in the living room. They talked and smiled. They laughed and just sat together. But then it got later and they had supper. 

They were ready to set their plans into action. 

later that night after Loki had gone to bed. Thor and Hela had made their way out of the tower.

They knew where the Helicarrier was thanks to Tony. He was the only other one that was filled in on the plan. Thank god he has on board with the plan.

But he also told them to be careful because they were going after the two best agents.

So they made their way towards the base. The wind rushed by and rain pelted down on them.

The light soon became visible to them. It was only landing now which was the easy part.

Once they landed Thor led the way through the halls. His blood boiled and he was ready to kill anyone in his path to get to the man that hurt his brother.

The first person that he saw was the man who had them assembled. Nick fury.

They stayed out of sight. They didn’t need him asking questions right now. Especially ones they may not be able to answer without giving their mission away.

They know it late and assume that they will be in their sleeping areas. So all they need to do is find the right room.

As they make their way they scan all the names. 

The first room they find is Williams. 

Taking his hammer Thor uses his lightning to break the lock. 

The door slides open with a quiet hiss, and the pair step into the room.

The man is fast asleep on his bed, completely unaware of what was happening.

Thor smiles thinking of all the things he could do to the man in this vulnerable state.

But instead hauls him out of the bed. He wants him to be awake and alert for what was about to happen.

The man gasps when his head crashes into the floor. He starts to sit up rubbing his head eye still half closed.

Hela pins him to the ground. 

With the man completely immobilized they could do whatever they wanted to do.

“What the hell? Let me up know!” 

“Did you let my brother up when you tortured him?” Thor asked.

There was no answer to the question other than another curse word. It was what Thor wanted. To leave the man speechless.

“Shut the hell up.” Thor grinds out already tired of hearing the man's complaints.

Thor takes the man's right hand and slams the hammer down on the appendage.

The Man screams and struggles.

“stop. stop stop it, FUCK!” 

The screaming doesn’t phase either of them, but the noise was bound to attract others to their location.

Thor moved to the other side of the man repeating what he had done with the other hand.

“Good luck torturing another being without your hands.” thor says wanting to make him think he was done with him.

“I promise i’ll never touch anything again, please. I’m sorry. Just please stop,” The man begs.

Thor moves to his head, smiling down at him.

“I wonder if my brother would have begged you to stop had he been able to speak?” Thor growls out.

“To bad you’ll never get the chance to know,” Thor softly speaks.

He raises his hammer above his head, and slams it down hard on the man's head. Blood and brain matter go everywhere. Over the room and on them.

Thor and Hela stand smiling.

They had planned earlier. Thor would take whoever they got to first, and Hela the other.

They leave the room. Still covered in blood but not caring in the slightest.

Along the way a few agents spot them and just run, quickly deciding it’s not worth the fight.

And soon enough they find Smith’s room.

Hela smiles “my turn,”


	28. Explaining why

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor and hela return to the tower

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey y’all so the best day of my life just passed. The person that I thought was just a friend (who I’ve had a crush on for like a year) asked me out. I’m at an all time high. So I hope you enjoy this chapter as much as I loved writing it.

“My turn,” Hela spoke menacingly.

They stepped into the room. Expecting to see a sleeping agent smith. Instead they see him sitting up at his desk.

He had earphones on. Thor could hear the music even through the earphones.

Hela had said before that she wanted this to be done fast. If loki was here he would have wanted it this way.

But she didn’t want it to be painless. 

She took out one of her daggers. The light shining off the blade. She smiles as she steps up behind the oblivious man.

She grabs him and plunges the knife into the man's ribs. This way he would drown in his own blood. It would be painful but relatively fast as he would fall into unconsciousness before long.

She drops him onto the floor. Smiling down at him.

“You’ll never injure another being again. Maybe you should have thought about your victims before torturing them,” she spits.

She’s holding the Knife to the man's abdomen, starting to put pressure.

Smith is gasping for breath wheezing and sputtering. 

“I’m sorry, i”m sorry, please I beg you to stop, it hurts.” is all he can get out.

Hela puts more pressure on the knife and it sinks into the man's stomach. Just for good measure Hela twists the knife and carves a smile into his stomach.

The man can’t scream, because he’s coughing up blood.

Hela stands again with a bloodied knife in hand.

“He’ll perish soon, let's go!” 

As they attempt to sneak out alarms start to blare.

Both of their hearts lurch and they take off running. As they planned they had to take out a few innocents to escape. But they got away flying back to the tower.

They landed on the balcony. Expecting to be alone in it so they could sneak away and wash the blood. What they didn’t expect was to find Loki on the balcony. He just watched with terror as everything fell into place.

“Brother. It is okay. You will never worry about them hurting you again,” Thor says as he takes a step forward.

“Why would you do this,” Loki quietly asked. His eyes watered.

“Because they harmed you. We thought you would want this,” 

“Why would I want this. Why would I want someone to be in pain?” 

“I thought it would help to put you at rest. Besides we made it a quick death.”

Loki didn’t hear the last part as he turned in his chair wheeling away. He planned to go to his room and nothing would stop him.

He passed Tony on his way.

Tony stands and makes his way out to the balcony. Confused.

“Well that seemed to go well,” He speaks.

“Not at all Stark. I can’t seem to understand why he wouldn’t want them dead?” 

“Because he knows how it feels to be hurt. I know the feeling. The difference is that I deal with my issues in a different way. We just have to talk to him so we can help him understand. But also so we can understand as well,”

“How does one even start that kind of conversation?” the female god asked.

“Well I’ll start talking to him. If you guys don’t feel comfortable talking about it with him i’ll tell you what he says. Okay?” 

Both goods nod. Together they walk off. Tony assumes they are getting cleaned up. So with a sigh he makes his way to the fallen gods room.

Over the past few days Tony worked out a way to get Loki to give him permission to come in without having to talk. One knock on Loki’s side ment he was welcome. Two meant that he was to come back later.

So he knocks on the door saying who it is. 

He hears a small knock on the other side. So he grabs the door knob and lets himself in.

“Hey bud. How are you doing?”

“Why would they do that? Why do people hurt others?”

“I think they wanted to help. I know that you didn’t want it. But if I’m honest i thought about doing the same thing more than once.”

“But you didn’t actually do it. That the difference between you and them.” 

“I know. I only didn’t do it because you needed me to be with you. I wanted to be with you,”

“They didn’t deserve it. No one does,”

“You’re right. Just like no one deserves to be tortured. No one deserves to go through what you went through,” 

“I know that too. I just wished I had a say in it. Not that they would have listened. Thor and Hela never listen when angry. People get hurt when people are angry,” 

“Do you get angry?” 

“At the beginning I was. But it only hurt me worse in the long run. When they were angry they hurt me worse. Nothing good comes from anger,” 

“You're allowed to be angry with them. It’s okay to be hurt by it. We wont hurt you. And when you're strong enough I will show you ways to get your anger out. Without hurting anyone. Okay?” 

“Okay,” 

“Listen. I know this is a lot. I understand,”

“Really?”

“Yeah. I do. Do you want to hear why?”

Loki only nods this time, clearly done talking.

“Well. a few years back. I went on a trip to a different country with the military. I was selling weapons at the time. Which i don’t do anymore. Anyway an enemy used a bomb of my own design against us. The shrapnel was lodged into my heart. They had to do surgery on me while I was awake. After that I was left in a cave hooked to a car battery that was keeping me alive. They forced me to make weapons for them. They waterboarded me. When I wouldn’t work. In that cave I made the first suit and used it to escape. But I had to kill people to do it. When I got better I went back to take out the people left alive.”

“Did you do it?”

“Honestly I don’t know. There were a lot of people working there.”

“How did you cope?” 

“Well I turned to alcohol. Stopped making weapons and starting fighting crime.”

“How did you become an avenger?” 

“Some good people from Shield recruited some extraordinary people and formed a team.”

“What do you guys usually do?” 

“Usually we come together to fight intergalactic threats.”

“Like me?” 

“Do you have any plans to take over earth or to harm humans?” 

“No, I would never harm your kind.”

“Then you don’t have to worry about it.”

“You won't harm me if I don’t try to harm you and your people.”

“No. absolutely not,”


	29. a dance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony feels like he takes two steps forward and a step back with Loki.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here yall go enjoy your meal.

Tony slowly walked from the room. He hoped he had gotten through to Loki. Mostly about them having good intentions.

He also knew that he was going to receive a call about this. Fury would know he had something to do with it. He would in turn have to cover for Thor.

He was honestly glad they did it. He knows if they didn’t he would have. If Loki had been in any state to defend himself he may have been more angry about it. But the thing is. Loki isn’t in any shape to fight.

Loki hadn’t done anything to deserve. He had been injured before it and he was even worse now.

Honestly it would be a miracle if he recovered from it. Tony didn’t expect him to mentally heal from this but hopefully he would make a full physical recovery.

Tony honestly felt for the guy. He hadn’t done anything to deserve it. He was taken from his room in the night and tortured.

Maybe if they had met before he would have wanted to go out and take out the bad guys. But now just the mere thought of hurting something seemed to destroy him. 

A part of Tony wondered just how much damage was done. Just what was done to him. How far had they been willing to go to break the once strong man. He knows what it's like to feel broken. He had felt it more than once or twice in his life.

As he walked back he pondered how to tell Thor and Hela. He needed them to know that Loki understands why they did what they did. But he also doesn’t want to be murdered in the process.

Maybe he could Lay it on them half gently. That had never been his speciality. Usually he went in head first and not really caring if he got hurt.

“Friend stark. What is the news on my brother?” 

“Well, he seems to understand why you did it. I don’t think he wants to see you guys right now. Just give him some time. He is still having conflicting feelings.”

“My brother was never one to fight. Not because he was weak. Quite the opposite actually. But he has a soft heart. He always hated to see others hurt.” Thor sighed.

“Well. I agree with what you guys did. Those two were always really violent with the people they question.”

“I think we did the right thing too. But Loki will come around.”

“He will. He’s pretty amazing. Has he always been courageous?” 

“My brother has always been willing to stand up for what he believes in. He would take out anyone who hurt others.”

“I’m glad he’s on our side. He would have put up quite the fight. And you said before that he has magic? I haven’t seen any examples since he got here?”

“He does indeed wield magic. You likely have seen it in his time here but only in little bits at a time. He uses magic to heal himself. When he was gone his reserve likely grew shallow trying to keep himself alive.”

“Was he born with it? Does it take a long time to learn?”

“He was indeed born with the ability. As for the amount of time it took to learn you’d have to ask him.”

“And did he always have short hair?” 

“No. Short hair is a symbol of slavery on asgard. Many people with Long hair are wealthy or of royalty. Loki always had his hair to his shoulders.”

“Do you think they forced him to cut it off?”

“I believe so. Loki would never willingly cut off his hair.”

Tony nods. Loki looked like someone that would be able to rock long hair. But his hair was completely chopped off. Right now it may be for the best. But if Loki decides to grow it out again he would let him.

“Sir there seems to be a problem in Mr. Odinsons room.”

“What's wrong J?”

“He seems to be having a panic attack. And is holding a pair of scissors.”

Suddenly Tony took off down the hall. What the hell could Loki be doing with scissors? 

Tony didn’t even bother knocking just opening the door. His head moved swiftly from to side to side. Searching for the missing god.

He heard heavy breathing and crying. It was coming from the bathroom. 

“Loki what's wrong bud?” 

Loki didn't respond. He was holding the scissors to his hair. His hands were shaking and he was crying. 

Tony walks over slowly. Taking the scissors gently. He didn’t want the guy to hurt himself with them.

“Loki. I need you to breathe. If you keep this up you’re going to pass out.”

Loki nods

“Follow my breathing as best you can.”

Tony takes slow deliberate breaths. He also listens for Loki following his breathing.

Loki calms down and is now only crying.

“Loki what happened?”

“I don’t know. My chest felt tight and I couldn’t breath.” 

“No. Why were you going to cut your hair?”

“Because I don’t deserve it. The longer it is the more worth a person has.”

This tied back to him feeling unworthy.

“Loki you can do what you want here. Your worth more than you may think. If you want to cut it off I will. If you don’t we'll let it grow out.”

“I don’t want to cut it.” The pale man says weakly.

“Okay well let's go. You have to eat something.”

“Thank you. You are truly an amazing human. I thank you for everything you have done for me,”

“Like I said. I don’t mind helping you. I enjoy doing it actually. It helps me to feel less guilty about the things I’ve done in my past.”

“What did you do?” Loki asks. He looked exhausted. He probably was. Panic attacks could be exhausting to come back from.

“That’s a story for another day. It’s a long one that I don’t really like telling.”

“That's okay. If you don’t want to tell me you don’t have to.”

“It’s alright. Now let's go get some food.”

Tony pushes Loki to the kitchen. They prepare for the usual meal time.

“What do you want to eat?”


	30. A walk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki and tony go for a walk and talk

Two days had passed since Tony and Loki’s talk.

Tony needs to get out of the tower. And he knows Loki does too. He’s been stuck inside for over eight years.

They had woken early and made breakfast. It only has eggs and hashbrowns but Loki eats it without complaining. He never did though. 

They ate in silence again as usual but it was nice. Tony usually didn’t eat or ate alone. Just having someone around was nice. One thing Tony found was that Loki didn’t like coffee. Unlike Thor who insisted on having every time he came down to earth. Instead Loki typically only drank water milk or tea.

So he prepared the kettle. Loki had whatever you put in front of him. Tony ended up buying every tea he could get. Loki never said anything about if he liked it more or less than any of the others he had tried. The only reason he knew Loki didn’t like coffee was because he made a strange face when he tried it. Tony had to tell him he didn’t have to drink it.

Loki always came out of his room happily. It was only when something triggering was brought up or done that Loki looked upset. He always looked clean when he left his room as well. It was as though he refused to leave his room without being dressed. Usually he dressed in some sweats and a loose t-shirt.

That morning Loki wheeled out and went right to the balcony. He looked so peaceful out there, eyes closed a small smile on his face. He looked kinda like an angel. Tony smiled at the scene. Loki was such a good person.

“Hey loki. Breakfast is ready.” Tony called after setting the table.

Loki looked away and rolled to the table.

Loki thanked him before starting to eat. For some unknown reason Loki always waited for Tony to start eating before he did. It was strange but Tony never asked him about it. He didn’t want to seem rude about it.

“Hey Loki. I’m going out for a quick walk today. Do you want to go with me?” 

Loki’s enthusiastic nod made Tony smile wide.

“Well it’s cooler today so I’d recommend wearing an extra layer.” 

Loki nods again.

“Perfect we will go around lunch. I want to introduce you to something. Its good and won’t hurt you.” 

Tony only added the last part because of the look on Loki’s face.

“You are sure you don’t mind me coming. I don’t want to interfere with your plans” 

“Loki if I didn’t want you to come I wouldn’t have asked if you wanted to.” 

“I just don’t want to be a burden.” 

“You’re not a burden. Honestly you’re one of the best things that has happened to me in a long time. I usually don’t leave my lab.” 

“Thank you.”

(five hours later)

They were going to leave in ten minutes. But Tony wanted to give Loki a chance to get ready.

“Loki it’s Tony.”

He knocks on the door waiting for the two knocks on Loki’s side.

He is sure Loki knows his voice by now. He still likes to tell Loki who it is when he goes into Loki’s room.

When he gets approval to enter he slowly pushes the door open. Loki is at his desk fiddling with the record player. He hadn’t plugged it in so it wasn’t making any noise.

“You have to plug it in bud. Here” 

Tony takes the cord and shows Loki how to plug it in. He then presses the play button and places the needle on the record.

Loki smiles at the slow calming music nodding in approval.

“Do you want to go for our walk and you can listen to this later?” 

Loki nods rolling towards the closet. Grabbing a black sweater and slipping into it. 

The god smiles hugging himself.

They leave the tower together making their way down with the elevator.

“It’s going to be really crowded for a bit. If you need to leave and come back home just tap twice on the arm rest.”

Loki nods.

He hopes that he doesn’t overload Loki’s senses. 

Once they step out Tony sees that it’s actually a calmer day than usual. Maybe this would be okay.

People stare at Tony as he walks next to Loki. the god looks so calm and content like this. That warm smile gracing his lips. The smile that only shows up every so often.

“Its a nice day out but it’s usually warmer than this out.” 

“I think this is perfect weather. That may be due to the fact that I’m jotun.”

“What's a Jotun again? Sorry.” 

“A jotun is a frost giant. They like ice land. They are blue with red eyes. And have very high tolerance to the cold. Unlike humans and asgardians.”

“So do you like winter best?”

“In asgard I did but they were still very hot.” 

“I’d like to go to asgard.” 

“A trip through the bifrost may kill you.” 

“At this point a trip through the bifrost may kill you as well. That's why I won’t let Thor take you back yet. As soon as you are stronger you’re free to do what you want.”

“I am glad you took me with you.” 

“I’m glad I took you with me too.”

“Two things. If you’re Jotun, who are your parents? And aren’t you small for a jotun?”

“Well my parents were Jotun. As for my size I was a runt. My parents sent me to asgard in fear that I would die in Jotunheim.”

“Okay cool.”

Tony didn’t recognize most of the words Loki was saying but that was it. Worst case scenario was that he would have to look them up.

“Well were here”

They were in front of a small worn down building. It was technically a pizza shop. From the outside no one would say they made good pizza. In Tony's opinion they had the best pizza around.

They went in and the smell flooded his nose. It had his mouth watering in seconds.

They ordered a medium pizza between them. 

Taking it they sat down in a corner both.

“What is this?” 

“It’s pizza. Basically cooked dough covered in a tomato sauce. Cheese. Pepperoni. And just about any other topping you can think of. It’s really good. Trust me.”

Loki still looked hesitant but took a slice anyways.

Tony also takes a slice biting into it and moaning in satisfaction.

Loki takes a bite out of his slice. His face lights up as flavour fills his mouth.

“How is it?” Tony asks. Hoping Loki liked it.

“This is amazing.”


	31. set backs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor messes up.

Loki was back home. He had enjoyed being with Tony. Overall he enjoyed being on Midgard. He felt like he belonged here. He didn’t have to be anything with Tony or Dr. Jones. He could be himself without being ridiculed or looked down on. He could be weak and afraid and no one would say anything to him for it.

He was supposed to get his sling off today at some point. Tony or Thor are going to get him when he needs to go down. 

Currently. He is sitting in his room fiddling with the globe Tony made him. 

He was lost in his world using the book that had the names of places on Midgard. He called out name after name rotating the globe to see the little red light.

There was a small landmass in a place called Canada. It was the furthest east on the whole continent. 

“Newfoundland” 

A little red dot appeared on the globe and he placed his finger on it.

He smiled a little and the little island kind of reminded him of himself. Alone out in an ocean. Floating away. Unknown unless in direct contact.

He always had felt alone or isolated, sure he was well known as a prince of Asgard but he had never been truly known. 

He had friends of course but even they didn’t know him. He had always kept to himself in fear of getting hurt.

Even with no one knowing him he had still been hurt. He had still been taken from the ones he loved. He had still been broken mentally and physically.

He was happy here though. A part of him didn’t want to go back to Asgard. Here he knew he was wanted for reasons other than being a prince. He was wanted because he was a person too. 

Soon he finished fiddling with the book placing his book back on the shelf grabbing a book on stars. Tony picked it up for him after learning that he liked to look at the stars.

He had gone out most nights at some point just to look at the odd one or two that he could see. But many couldn’t be seen due to pollution.

He rolled to the window seat transitioning himself from his chair to the seat.

Reading about stars was fascinating as well. I learned about large groups of stars called constellations. And how every so often stars will explode and die.

He was deep into his book once again lost in his own world. He let his guard down. Which was a stupid decision on his part. He didn’t mean to, he had just got lost in his own mind. When was the last time he had even gotten the chance to read a book?

He didn’t hear the door open. Usually Tony was the only one to come in but he always knocked. He never just came in. If Loki didn’t respond he would just go away and come to find him later. So it was unexpected for someone to come in.

“Loki?”

Thor called to him, but instead of Thor’s voice. He heard Thanos’.

A hand was placed on the back of his neck. 

Suddenly he was back. The pain in his neck was back. The lack of oxygen was back.

Thanos was in front of his hand wrapped around his neck crushing his fragile neck. He couldn’t breathe. His chest felt tight. The darkness was creeping into his vision. He felt lightheaded. The darkroom was spinning.

“You’re weak. You will never be anything other than a worthless pile of bones. Never think you are anything else.”

Thanos called at him smiling menacingly down at him. Tightening his grip on his neck. 

Would the pain ever end? He felt like he was going to pass out. His world was going more and more dark by the second.

“Loki. Loki you have to try and breathe. You’re going to pass out if you don’t.” 

Easy for them to say whoever was talking to him. 

“You’re okay. You’re not here, you’re at my tower. You’re with Tony.”

Something wrapped itself around him. He fought it with all his might. But it was useless. He was too weak. That wasn’t anything new. So he lay there accepting his fate.

“Follow my breath buddy. You’re doing so well.” 

He did as told trying to regain his breath. Slowly everything faded back to normal.

He was on the floor in the corner laying down turned away from the wall.

His head was swimming and he was lightheaded. The darkness was fading in and out.

“I know you’re tired but you need to stay awake. I know you’re scared but it’s okay.” 

Loki wanted to sleep so badly. He closed his eyes for a second, opening them again slowly. The lightheadedness was starting to take over. The darkness took up more and more of his vision. So he stopped fighting. Like he always did and let the darkness take him away.

(later)

As he regained awareness he looked around. His sling was off. But his hand was wrapped up.

He was in a familiar location. The room he had been in when he first got here. His chair was next to his bed.

Three figures were in the room. He slowly blinked. Trying to make out who it was.

It took a minute but eventually. He recognized them as. Tony, Thor, and Hela. 

“What-what happened?” 

“You had a panic attack and passed out,” Tony explained.

He looked angry. Was he mad at him? It wouldn’t be surprising.

“What’s wrong?” 

“Your brother is a fucking idiot. He’s the reason you had the panic attack.” 

“I am sorry. I didn’t realize you would react that way.” 

Loki looked down. He was still tired. He was always tired lately. But he felt like he hadn’t slept in forever right now.

“It is okay brother. You didn’t know any better.” 

Loki wanted people to be happy. Not mad. Nothing good was going to happen with thor angry.

“Loki do you want us to leave so you can sleep?” 

He did but he didn’t want to say that he did.

As if reading his mind Tony pushed Thor and Hela 

He didn’t want Tony to leave him. Tony was safe. Tony helped.

“Tony.” He weakly called out.

“What’s wrong?” Tony asked, popping his head back through the door.

“Stay. Please.”


	32. Taken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony fucks up.

To say Tony was angry would be an understatement. Right now he was furious.

What was he mad at? Everything. How could someone be so stupid to do something like grab someone who’s traumatized?

It was ridiculous but he didn’t want to freak Loki out at the same time. So when he called out to him and wanted him to stay. He had done exactly that. He couldn’t have said no even if he wanted to.

So he waited for Loki to fall asleep. It hadn’t taken long but he needed to talk to Thor.

What if Loki had hurt himself worse. He was lucky this time only getting a couple of scrapes and a bruise. But it could have been so much worse.

Now just watching the sleeping god peacefully he smiled. It was a sad smile but a smile none the less. He wanted Loki to get better and he knows it’s going to take time. Maybe having people who aren’t used to dealing with trauma victims shouldn’t be around. But at the same time Thor was Loki’s brother.

He knows that this is going to set them back a few blocks. He feels like he’s doing a dance of sorts. Two steds forward one or two steps back. But as long as he’s around he’s gonna take Loki’s hand and guide him through it.

He turned and left the room.

He tracked down Thor. really it didn’t take long Thor isn’t exactly the most sneaky person you’ll meet.

Tony stalked up behind him. Grabbing his shoulder. Thor whips around ready to fight.

“You don’t like that much either do you?” he growled.

Thor just looked to the ground. At least he looked guilty.

“What the hell was that?” Tony asked referring to grabbing Loki. When had he become so protective anyways?

“I don’t know Stark. I wasn’t thinking.”

“Damn right. Because no one in their right mind would grab someone who’s that traumatized.”

“He used to like it when I did that. I didn’t think he would react like that.”

“Do you have any clue where the bruises on his neck came from?”

“No.”

“Whoever had him before crushed his neck. They grabbed him by the neck and fucking crushed it.”

“Well I didn’t know that. How could I have known that?”

“You could have fucking asked for more information. I would have told you.”

“Why wouldn’t Loki tell me?”

“He’s traumatized. He wouldn’t tell me anything either. He’s terrified.”

“I’m sorry.”

“That’s not fucking good enough damn it. He’ll say it’s fine but it’s not. You put him back there. You’re the one responsible for putting him back in his own hell.”

“What can I do to make it better?”

“Go back to Asgard. Let me deal with this. When he is better mentally you can come back. But for now just go. It’s better for everyone.”

Thor tilted his head down

“But he can’t sleep without me.”

“I have a feeling that after this. He’s not going to sleep with even you. I have a feeling that your goddamn idiocy just put him back a whole bunch of steps. So just go.”

Thor turns nodding sadly walking away. 

Tony turns to the wall running his hands down his face. This was a mess. He was a mess.

He wonders if maybe he was a little too hard on Thor?

But all in all he thinks it would be better for Loki if Thor and Hela weren’t here. So far they’ve only done a good few things to make Loki happy. But the things they do that were messed up only made things worse for Loki.

But still maybe they should stay. Just back off more. Let him handle some things. Show them how to help Loki. how to not do more damage than good.

He sighs.

“J call Thor and Hela for a meeting. And tell them it’s not urgent.”

“Yes sir.”

“Oh and Jarvis mute. I don’t want to be interrupted during this meeting.”

Tony makes a cup of coffee and tea for Thor and Hela. Taking them both and sitting at the table.

Thor arrives first. He had clearly not been too far away.

“Look I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have been so hard on you. You should stay. Loki needs you and I need you and Hela.”

“It is okay. I understand. I should have thought before doing that.” 

“Well make sure you do when you go to him again.”

Thor nods and Tony smirks a little. He is at least getting through to Thor. 

Hela arrives a moment later strutting into the room. Confidence radiates off of the woman. A confidence he wishes he genuinely had.

“Thanks for getting here so quick. I just wanted to talk to you guys about what happened today and how we can move forward in a healthy way.”

They both nod attention fully on him.

“Okay. We all know what happened. Loki had a flashback. But it could have been a lot worse than it was. He could have seriously hurt himself trying to get away.”

“But he is supposed to be more resilient.”

“I know. But as I was told before he is considered a weak asgardian. Or a very strong human. But if his body tried to use magic that wasn’t there to use couldn’t he have been hurt?”

“Yes. He could have heavily strained his mind and body. He may have collapsed and hit his head or a weak point.” Hela answers quickly.

“Exactly. Which is what I wanted to talk about. Mainly about how to approach him without scaring him. Which is by knocking.”

“That is all?”

“Well not exactly. I knock. Then say my name and wait for him to knock back to me. It’s usually three knocks back.”

“Why would Loki knock back? And what if he doesn’t knock back?” 

“Well if he doesn’t knock back then I go back later and try again. I only keep going in if it’s urgent. And he knocks back because he doesn’t seem to really like talking unless it’s to ask or answer a question.”

“So he usually lets you in?”

“Up to this point he had let me in every time.”

“He seems to have really taken to you. That is quite the feat. Loki usually doesn’t like people.”

“Thanks.” 

“Jarvis. Unmute.” Tony says.

“Sir my security had been breached.”

“Shit what happened?”

“Unknown agents entered the building and took Mr. Odinson.”


	33. constant chaos

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony isn't having a good time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess what, I'm finished on my side of writing and am going back to normal posting! yay!

“Shit shit SHIT.” Tony exclaimed as he paced.

He was so stupid thinking nothing would happen if he left Loki alone and muting Jarvis.

“How long ago did that happen? What exit did they take?”

“15 minutes ago sir. They took the roof exit.”

“What plane did they take? Or helicopter?”

“It looked like a shield aircraft. Like the one you took on your return.”

“Get a suit ready. I have to make a phone call.”

“Yes sir.”

Tony ground his teeth as he began to walk out of the room. How fucking dare they take Loki away. Why couldn’t they stay away.

“Tony. What can we do?” 

“Stay here. For now I’ll get back to you.”

Tony didn’t wait for an answer. He went down to the med bay. He had to talk to Dr. Jones. Where the hell had she been? Had she even tried to stop them? Why hadn’t she come and got him?

He was steaming at this point. Logically he knows that it’s his fault. He had been stupid enough to mute J. But he really didn’t want to admit it.

The doors open and he sees people in Loki’s room. He storms up to them. They turn to hear him stomping in.

“Where the hell were you?” He half yelled.

“We were in between shift changes and Dr. Jones had left for lunch.”

“So no one was here to do the one job you have at this point? You literally only have to feed and watch him. I fucking thought that you were the best in the business.” He growls.

“We’re sorry Mr. Stark.”

“Sorry isn’t fucking good enough. Sorry doesn’t bring him back. Sorry doesn’t take back the fact that no one was here to watch.” Tony yelled. Causing the doctors to cower.

“We know.”

“Well I hope you are all happy. God only knows where they took him.”

Dr. Jones picks that moment to stroll into the room. Upon stepping in she feels the atmosphere change.

“What’s wrong?” The woman asks Tony.

“Why don’t you ask one of you useless assistants?”

Tony storms back out of the room and back to the elevator. 

Hopefully Loki is alright and not hurt. The only saving grace is that Willams and Smith are dead.

He has to call Shield. If Shield has him he would have to figure out a way to get him back. Loki didn’t deserve this. He hadn’t even done anything even slightly villainous since his arrival. Quite the opposite really. He openly voiced how he hated anger and that nothing good comes from it.

He really hopes that he won’t need to kill someone to get Loki back if he’s honest. Not that he won’t if the time calls for it. 

For the first time he realises just how he’s been reacting. If this was anyone else he wouldn’t have really cared. But Loki is special to him. Loki so quickly took a large part of his heart. He wanted Loki to get better but so far there have been so many obstacles in his way. Tony thinks that maybe he can relate on a level. 

He makes his way to his lab. Getting ready to call Shield. He knows he can’t freak out at them but he wants to. If he does freak out it’s going to make everything harder.

So he grabs a cup of coffee and sits at his desk breathing calmly.

Once he feels calm again he closes his eyes. He still can feel the anger but it’s not as intense as it was before. He can talk to them without flying through the screen and murdering someone.

“J call shield. Please.”

The screen comes up. It’s a video call. It’s both good and bad. Good because he can directly see who ever answers the phone. Bad because he will want to kill them more.

Coulson pops up on the screen. He’s alone in a light room.

“Hello Tony.”

“Why did you take Loki?” He speaks evenly. He hopes that Coulson can sense his anger.

“Two of your friends breached our security.”

“I know what does that have to do with Loki?”

“They killed two of my best agents.”

“Yes. I still don't see what this has to do with Loki.”

“He is related to them. How do we know that he’s not a threat?”

“I can tell you that he’s not a threat. He wouldn’t hurt a fly. He is way more afraid of anger than anyone i’ve ever met.”

“We just want to question him and then you can have him back.”

“I want to be there. He rarely speaks to any one. He will talk to me. If i’m around it will make it easier for you guys as well.”

“No you seem to not be happy about the deaths of my two agents. They seem to have had no repercussions.”

“Well talking to Loki isn’t doing anything for them.”

“If we can come to an agreement on Thor and Hela you can come get Loki. until than you are prohibited from entering the helicarrier.”

“If I am to agree to anything I need Loki to be given a room on the helicarrier. I want him to be able to go anywhere safe on the helicarrier. I don’t care if you have agents with him while I am on the way. I also want him given clean clothes. Along with regular feeding.”

“Okay. I can do that. But why regular feeding?”

“Because he was starved. If you feed him too much than you can overload his system and do more damage than good.” 

“Why does he need to have free rein?”

“Because he’s been Locked in tiny rooms for the past eight years of his life.”

“Okay. well for your part. I need Thor and Hela under house arrest while on earth. If they break the arrest they won’t be able to come back down to earth.”

“That's all?” 

“Yes.”

“I can do that. It would be my pleasure.”

“Well I don’t want anyone hurt.”

“I know. But if I’m with Loki then can I ask the questions?”

“You can be present for the questioning. But you can’t ask the actual questions. You’re too close to him.”

“Okay all good.”

“Good.”

“Also next time you decide to break in and kidnap one of my friends let me know. I was fully ready to go on a killing spree.”

“You’ve become quite attached to Loki haven’t you?”

“I have to go.” Tony says dodging the question.


	34. taking off

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony takes the reigns from Thor and Hela.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who just got a job! that right, but that also means that the plan of trying to start another story for this fandom is gonna get put on hold until I can manage my time. but this story will have no problems since it's already done.

Tony turns in his chair. He wants to scream. When has he become so close to Loki? Why had he let himself get that close? He knows exactly what happens when he lets people close. When he lets people in. 

People always get hurt. That’s a fact.

He can’t let that get in the way right now though. He has to go to Loki. Loki is gonna be freaking out. 

“Did he wake up when they took him?” Tony asks Jarvis.

“Yes, sir”

“Did he at least struggle?”

“No sir. If you want to see the footage. I have it prepared on the screen behind you.”

Tony turns in his chair. The footage Jarvis spoke about was up on the screen.

Right now Loki was just laying in bed. He looked to be asleep but his heart rate was up. Maybe he was having a nightmare.

No one was in the room for the entire video. Where the hell was everyone.

Two people walk in. Two people who he doesn’t recognize. They just walk in like they own the place. 

Tony is going to up his security and take the mute feature off Jarvis. Or at least make him able to override it if it’s an emergency.

Loki hears the strange footsteps and snaps awake. He looks scared and confused. A look that Tony sees Loki’s face all too often.

They take him gently likely due to the gods lack of fight. They place him gently in his wheelchair and handcuff him. Pushing him out of the room.

The view changes to the camera in the elevator. 

Loki is clutching the armrests in a death grip. 

One of the agents looked down at him. A sympathetic look on his face. 

He bends down in front of Loki. Looking at him.

“I’m sorry. Look we don’t want to take you from here. We are on a mission. And we promise to return you back here.”

Loki doesn’t speak but he responds with a small nod.

“It won’t take long. I’ll keep it as short as possible.”

Still Loki doesn’t speak. He just sits there. 

He’s probably thinking Tony’s gonna come rescue him.

But because Tony was a goddamn idiot he turned off the thing that could notify him of this emergency. He did come to his rescue.

He’s such an idiot he had one job and he couldn’t even do that.

But he is gonna make this right again. He’s going to get Loki back.

He stands again. Walking over to the elevator. He has done a lot of this lately. Whether it’s to go hang out with Loki. To eat with Loki. Or go back to his lab. 

He rides to the penthouse. He hopes he can talk to Thor and hela before he has to leave. But chances are he’s not going to get the chance to.

They are always elsewhere usually watching a movie together eating everything in the tower together or working out. 

That’s a big reason why his grocery bill goes up when they are over.

Tony can’t let them leave the tower. He needs them to understand that they need to stay here. If they want him to bring Loki back home they have to obey the rules too. 

They couldn’t just teleport in here and think they run the place. He just wasn’t too keen on trying to take down the two biggest power houses he knows. 

Honestly he doesn’t doubt that Loki is gonna be strong. Maybe even stronger than Thor and Hela. But he really doubts that Loki is going to fight with them. Not after everything that he went through. Plus Loki doesn’t look like he’d hurt a fly.

“J call Thor and Hela to the kitchen again.”

“Yes sir. Mr. Odinson and ms. Odinson are currently in the gym together.”

“Okay. Tell them when they are ready to meet me here.”

Tony prepares some soda at the table and gets his suit ready. He wants to be able to leave as soon as their conversation is over.

The two appear a few minutes later. They were half running half walking into the room.

“What is it?” Hela asks.

“I know where loki is.”

Before he is bombarded with questions Tony puts a hand up. He needs silence to talk about this.

“You two sit down. I have more than that to talk about.”

The duo sit down in their spots completely silent.

“Why aren’t we going to get Loki?” Thor asks quietly.

“Because you guys are the reason that he’s where he is.”

“What did we do? And where is he?”

“You guys went and killed those two assholes. I’m not saying that they didn’t deserve it but because of you two loki is getting roped into it. Shield has him at the helicarrier.”

“Then we have to go get him.”

“No thor. I have to get him. You two have to stay here. You’re both currently under tower arrest. If you go with me they aren’t gonna let me see loki.” 

“They deserve every second of it.”

“I agree. But because of how stupid you are when angry. Innocent others died. And because of your actions Loki is getting questioned to see if he is a threat.”

“Our brother is not a threat.” Hela said. She had only been listening up to this point.

“I know that. I don’t think loki would hurt a god damn fly. Yet here we are. So I’m going to shield base to be with Loki. It’s the only way he is gonna get treated right.”

“What about us?” 

“You guys are gonna stay here. There are plenty of things to do here. But you can’t leave. If you leave than i can’t stay with Loki. I promise that I’ll make regular phone calls to you and update you. Please just do as you’re told for once.”

“Fine.” Thor and hela say.

“Good. I have to go.” Tony says turning. He had this one thing to do. He was going to succeed.

That was his last though as he suited up blasting off into the sky.


	35. Safety

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony arrives at the helicarrier

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’d like to apologize for missing my usual day, I completely forgot which day it was, I haven’t been sleeping right lol, been a little off physically just a common cold, I should be back to normal soon, and I won’t forget again.

Tony wasn’t paying any attention to the scenery on this flight. He didn’t let Jarvis take over or anything. He wanted to get to the helicarrier quickly. 

He wondered how Loki was doing. Not that the guy would tell anyone. He barely even speaks. But when he does it’s the most beautiful sound. The soft tone is such a contrast to Thor’s booming voice. Even Hela’s softer voice is still louder and more rough than Loki’s

Loki was hard to read sometimes. He had a lot of trouble telling if Loki was actually happy. It was only when he was having a really bad day that Tony could read his emotions. 

The Heli carrier was coming into sight soon. Anger flooded his body. Just the mere thought of the two people just walking in without any alarms sounding.

Once he landed on the runway Tony half ran to the door. He felt about ready to rip all the doors off their hinges to get to Loki at this point. 

Tony swears to god if Loki is hurt in any physical way he’s going to murder every single person on the ship.

Once to the main floor he asks Coulson where Loki is. 

Apparently they are asking him questions. Apparently he isn’t answering them. They are all such idiots. He thinks they are a threat of course he’s not going to answer the goddamn questions. 

Coulson tells him that he can watch them but can’t interfere. He also tells him that he can see him and bring him to his room once they are done. Tony highly doubts Loki is gonna stay in his room here.

Tony speed walks to the right room. There is a room that says interrogation room and one next to it that Tony assumes is the viewing room.

Tony opens the door with no hesitation. He needs to know that Loki is okay. He needs to see that he’s not hurt. He knows that Loki is going to be afraid and confused but he shouldn’t be hurt.

When he turns to the glass he sees that the two agents are sitting with Loki across the table. A small glass of water sat next to him.

Agent Fitz and agent Ward are just trying to make civil conversation.

“Look. We both know what happened here. We honestly don’t want to hurt you. But we need you to answer our questions.” agent Fitz spoke softly. Agent Ward just sat silently. 

The two weren’t new. But they knew what they were doing. Tony trusted them not to hurt Loki.

He watched. They continued to ask their questions. Getting no response from Loki in any way. Tony knew this was gonna happen. When they took Loki out of the tower they took him from his safe zone. He wasn’t going to answer them if he didn’t feel safe.

With a sigh Fitz stands up. “I’ll try this again later Loki. If you have anything to tell us then write it down on this. Just remember the faster you answer our questions the faster we can get you back home.” Fitz says this as he moves Loki out of the room.

Tony moves out of the room to. He watches Ward open the door. He watches Loki get pushed from the room.

“I got it from here guys. Coulson already told me where his room is.” 

Loki’s head snaps up. Turning to look at Tony. He takes hold of the wheels. He didn’t even think he pushed himself to Tony. He had improved greatly.

Tony was both delighted and sad. Delighted because it meant that he was going to be able to walk again hopefully. But that also meant that he would go back to Asgard again.

Tony smiled at Loki who stopped just barely a foot away from him.

“Nice job bud. You’ve gotten a lot stronger.” 

Loki blushed a little at the complement. The Longer he stayed with Tony it seemed the more compliments he got. 

Tony walks beside Loki as they walk. He can see the determination in Loki’s eyes. What he said was true in all aspects. He was stronger physically. But he was also slowly recovering mentally. The Loki Tony heard about coming back piece by piece. At the same time Tony knows that the old Loki will never fully come back. 

By the time they get back to the room Tony is pushing Loki again. It doesn’t bother him in the slightest. 

Once in Loki’s room Tony stops and sits by Loki.

“How are you doing bud.”

“I want to go back to the tower. Please.”

“I know. I want you to come home again too.”

“What did I do wrong? Why did they take me back here?”

“You didn’t do anything. It was Thor. They took you because they are assholes. And think you could be a threat.”

“I don’t want to hurt anyone. I promise.” Loki's voice is heavy with emotions. Tony can see he’s on the verge of tears.

“I know you don’t. You have to tell them that though. I’ll be there in a nearby room if you need me. I will know if they hurt you. But these aren’t like the last guys. They won’t hurt you.”

“How do you know that?”

“I know that because I know them. They are good guys. They are like me and you.”

Loki nods. 

“You should get some sleep. I can stay with you if you want.”

“If you want to. It doesn’t matter.”

Tony knows that it does matter. It matters to him. It also matters to Loki.

So he stays. He helps Loki into bed and sits in the chair next to the bad. He kept watch. But Loki didn’t sleep. He didn’t shut his eyes.

“Do you want me to lay with you?”

Loki doesn't respond. 

Tony waits for a few more minutes. But he soon stands. He walks over laying down with Loki.

It felt weird. He rarely just layed with anyone. He soon falls asleep. 

Loki cautiously curls into him. Taking in his warm scent. Tony was safe. Tony was good. Tony made everything whole again. Loki fell asleep that night with a small smile gracing his lips.


	36. Answers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki answers SHEILD’s questions.

Tony is the first to wake. There’s something pressing into his side that startles him for a moment. He looks down and sees Loki curled into his side. He smiles down at Loki. he looks so peaceful like this. 

He just lays there for a few minutes. Loki’s hair had gotten longer. Almost down to his ears. He looked different than before. He looked stronger. He had gained more weight. Tony thinks is partly due to his Jotun blood. 

A part of Tony has excepted that Loki’s going to want to go back home soon. But Loki is special to Tony now. He’s taken a part of Tony’s heart that no one has been able to reach up to this point. 

Tony didn’t even realize that he wasn’t straight until he met Loki. He never really experimented though. Another factor may be that he rarely let anyone into his life. He had been hurt by too many people to let his heart be out there that much.

But now that he had heard it from so many people it really started to set in. He loved Loki. He wants Loki. He needs Loki. 

He smiles. It’s like that last piece of a puzzle had been put in. He found that lost piece of himself.

He looked back down again only to see a set of green eyes staring back into his.

“Hey,” Tony says a little startled.

Loki smiles. Letting go of Tony.

“It’s all good bud. You can curl into me any time.” Tony says. Honestly, he felt more comfortable with Loki than only of the other people he had slept within his life. 

Loki blushes. But half curls into him again. 

“Are you ready to answer their questions?” Tony asks. He’s just curious.

Loki nods a little. He was scared when they took him. Now they are being kind to him.

He wasn’t scared of these agents but he didn’t want to be here.

Some time passes as they just lay there. Tony can feel that Loki has grown weight wise. He isn’t usually with Loki for his examinations just so he can have some privacy. He’s only notified if something serious has happened. 

But there is a massive improvement since the first day with him. He can still feel his ribs but not in a unhealthy way. Right now if Tony had Loki’s shirt off he doesn’t think he’d be able to just count his ribs. But he can feel them in the way that Loki just has a slim body.

Another thing that Tony is curious about is why Loki doesn’t feel cold. He’s a frost giant so shouldn’t he be naturally cooler?

“Loki I have a weird question.”

“What is it?” 

“Why don’t you feel cold to the touch, aren’t you a frost giant.” 

“I’m a frost giant yes. But my magic that keeps me in my asgardian form is made to be much like anyone elses. If I removed that magic I would be colder to the touch.” 

Tony finds that fascinating Loki looks and feels no different that Tony does. But he’s a completely different species.

“Can I ask you a question?” Loki asks.

“Sure.”

“Why do you grow your beard so short?”

“Its a goatee I just look better with it like this. If I grow it out more than this, it gets patchy. Why don’t you have any facial hair?”

“I just never grew any. I don’t like it on myself.”

There is a knock on the door startling both men. Tony nearly falls off the bed. Quickly standing and brushing himself off. He glances at a smirking Loki and has to fight his own laugh.

Tony opens the door. There is a random agent.

“I’m here to collect Loki.” he says calmly.

“First of all I can take him myself. Second he’s not an object he’s a person to. You’re not here to collect him. You’re here to keep him company on his journey.” Tony says sharply. He has no time for people who don’t treat others with respect.

The man rolls his eyes but apologizes.

“It’s okay Tony. I don’t mind.”

“I mind. I will go with you. I’m gonna be with you the whole time you just wont actually see me.”

Loki is in his wheelchair now at Tony’s side smiling at him.

Loki takes hold of the wheels and pushes himself forward.

They walk together and grab some food along the way. Than Tony shows Loki the right room. 

Tony walks into the other side of the glass. He would be here for every second of this.

“Hey Loki. you ready to answer our questions?” Fitz asks.

Loki nods. 

“Great. Of at anytime you need to stop or take a break just let us know.”

Loki nods again in understanding.

“Okay first. What were your intentions for earth when you first got here?” 

“I had no poor intent. I didn’t even have a choice in where I landed. I have enjoyed my time here.”

“Good. Do you work with or know anyone who could have poor intent for earth?”

“I know someone. The person who sent me here. He is a murderous psychopath. If midgard stands in the way of his goals he will crush it.” 

“What about your brother and sister?” 

“No absolutely not. They wouldn’t want to hurt midgard. They made a stupid choice.”

“It’s okay. We believe you. Can you tells us about your time here mainly about your time with agents williams and smith?”

“When I landed here your men found me. They took me here and tried to get information from me. I would have been able to give them whatever they needed if I could’ve.”

“Why couldn’t you give them what they wanted?”

“The man before then had sewn my lips together to forbid any communication.”

“I’m sorry you had to go through that. And i’m sorry our agents treated you that way. The vast majority of out men are morally correct.”

“I understand you have treated me with nothing but kindness since my arrival here.”

“Last question for now. What happened to you before your arrival here?”


	37. Questions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> questions questions and more questions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys, I was thinking of doing something different with the last three chapters where I post back to back, how do you feel about that? or will I stick to the normal schedule?

Loki paled at the question. If he said that name would he somehow be summoned? He had to answer though. what would they do if he didn’t?

From his position behind the glass Tony stiffened. This wasn’t gonna go anywhere good. This is going to set off a panic attack.

Sure he wants to know to but Loki’s in no headspace to answer that kind of question. Tony watched wanting to intervene but knowing he couldn’t.

Loki opened his mouth, closed it, and opened it again. Seeming to form the words but unable to push them out into the open air.

This continued for about two more minutes before Fitzr places a hand on Loki’s. it’s gentle but it snaps Loki out of his thoughts.

“Why do you ask?” Loki says weakly.

“Because we need to know his behavior to figure out if he’s a treat we need to prepare for.”

“I can’t say his name.” Loki says choking on his tears.

“Why not?” 

“I don’t know if it would summon him.”

“Can you write it?” Ward asks taking a notepad and pen out.

Loki nods.

In shaking writing Loki writes the word Thanos. 

Both agents nod.

“Can you tell us what this being did to you?”

“Yes.”

Tony is still a little nervous. This is a lot to do. Especially so soon after he got his life back. 

“Well when I first was taken I had large pools of magic at the ready. I fought it as much as I could and took out more than one guard in my attempts to flee.”

“How long ago was this?”

Around 8 years ago. I’m not really sure my sense of time was tainted in my time there.”

“Would you kill anyone now?” 

“No, I didn’t kill the guards I used an enchantment to knock them out until I could flee. It was only short range so I couldn’t knock out all the guards.”

“Did you ever actually get out? I’ve heard that you have magical abilities.”

“I almost did on a few occasions. But never all the way. He was always watching and sending guards. And on my abilities. Most of them I use to my advantage I need to be in a well know place. I’d never been where I was being held hostage.”

“You were there for eight years you said. Is your magic infinite or did you run out and how fast? Did this man know how to drain you energy?”

“My magic was thought to be infinite. But about a year in I think it ran low. What was left was used to heal smaller things. The torture drained me. My magic was put into healing my body but it was futile in the long run.”

“You said torture. How long? What kind? Why?”

“The whole time I was gone, so eight years. It was psychological, physical, and sexual. And the reason for it was because I was strong. He wanted to break my spirit so he could use me as his puppet. I refused to break but broke to far for use so he sent me here.”

“What did the torture include?”

“Why do you need that?” 

“Because if our people are in danger we need to know how far this guy is willing to go to get what he wants.”

Tony is pissed. Loki is sitting there having to relive everything he been through. He wanted to stop it. But at the same time he wants to know what thanos did to Loki as well.

Loki gripped the chair he sat in. Tears flooding his eyes. 

“Wipping daily. Increasing every few days. Beatings. Injecting things into my veins, thrown around a lot and hit by things. I usually was chained to a wall. They had tried to sew my eyes shut on multiple occasions. They twisted my mind in attempts to use it against me. Showing me visions of me attacking Midgard, having a hand in the fall of asgard. The death of both my adopted family and my biological family. And I’d rather not talk about my sexual torture.” Loki ended firmly. He usually didn’t sound that sure about anything. Tony was proud to say the least.

“That’s okay. We can go if you want.”

Loki nods. 

“I want Tony to come in.” He whispered.

“We’ll go get him. You can go back to the tower after that we are finished. You did good.”

Loki doesn’t respond. He just sits there. The two look confused at the sudden change but Tony can practically see the gears turning and his heart racing.

Tony spins on his heel and legs it towards the door. He had a mission. He was getting to Loki. 

Both doors open at the same time.

Fitz and Ward cringe a little. They must have thought he wasn’t there.

“How could you ask him that. You guys are getting information as it is. He needs time, you could have just made it so much worse.” Tony grinds out.

“We’re sorry but we needed this faster. He did well and you guys can go. He’s a good guy. He could be a great asset.” Ward says.

“I honestly don’t think he’s gonna want to fight or hurt others.” Tony says slipping past the two agents. 

When tony enters the room he notices that Loki hasn’t moved from his previous position. But he’s shaking now. Tony’s heart aches for him. He doesn’t deserve to have to relive all that. 

He gathers Loki into his arms. Running his hands up and down his back. The god is like a board. Tony doesn’t think Loki could move if he wanted to.

“It’s alright. You’re not there anymore. You’re here with the people that love you more than you may ever know. It;s going to take some time to feel normal. Thats okay. I’ll be there for you every step of the way. Becuase you’re the best person I know. Becuase you deserve to feel normal again. But above all else, because I love you.”

It had just slipped out. Tony doesn’t even know if Loki is in the lgbt community. He doesn’t know if Loki would even like him. 

Loki stiffened in his arms but only for a moment before cuddling in closer.

“I want to go home. Please”

“I’ve already got a plane arranged. We just have to get on. I’ll even let you sit in the co-pilot's seat!” Tony says.

Loki nods. 

Together they push on. One uphill battle after the other.


	38. Please don’t make me leave

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki is almost better, but realizes he doesn’t really want to go back to Asgard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look I could probably drag this story out for another ten chapters. To be honest I would get bored and it would be really dragged out, plus It’s not how I wanted to write this story, I want this to be faster paced. I’m going through a depressive episode right now, so writing isn’t gonna go anywhere, I know from passed episodes that when I get like this nothing gets done quick so enjoy.

\- READ AUTHORS NOTE -

(2 months later)

Loki was walking around again. He had been using the weight stabilizers. He’s legs were still weak but the braces helped. He could get up a flight of stairs without collapsing now.

Right now Loki was doing his physio. He had to go three times a week. But it helped more and more.

Loki was eating whatever he wanted now. He still was hesitant to take something without asking.

One thing Tony realizes is that Loki is going to be able to go back to Asgard pretty soon. He was going to lose Loki. That thought hurt his heart.

When Loki got back he was at least standing. He usually was in his chair. 

His magic was helping a lot really. No human would recover at the speed Loki has. 

“Do you want something to eat?” Tony asks. 

“Yes please.” Loki says taking his usual spot at the table.

Tony makes some Kraft dinner. He doesn’t really know how to make much. He’s been trying his best though. Pepper was introduced to Loki not to long ago and they got along great. Peppers been sending him recipes a lot so he’s been trying different things.

“I don’t want to go back to Asgard yet Tony.” Loki wispered from the table.

Tony feels bad. He doesn’t want Loki to do anything he doesn’t want to do. But Asgard is his home.

“Go and try. You can always come back and visit. I’m not going anywhere.” Tony says.

“When are you going back anyways?”

“Two days from now Thor is going back. He thinks I’m ready to go. We have healers on Asgard that can help to. But I won’t be hurt by the force of the bi-frost.”

“That’s okay. You’ll get even better. You can be with your family. Your friends. You can be in your room.”

“I’m getting better. I like it here. More than I’ve ever liked Asgard and all it’s warriors.” Loki says. He doesn’t say it in a bitter way. Just sad.

“If you don’t like it there let Thor now. Your always welcome to stay here with me. I like having you around. It’s nice having a actual person around. No offence Jarvis.”

“I know but I don’t want to let Thor and hela and mother and father down.”

“You’re not going to. If they are good parents they will let you come back. You can always go back for visits.”

“I guess. But what if they don’t understand?”

“You get Thor to talk to them. I’ve heard good things about them from Thor. I think it’s all going to be fine.”

“So you don’t mind if I come back?”

“Of course not. I like having someone around to talk to. Someone who listens to me.”

“Do others not listen to you?”

“Not usually. I have high status socially but in the team most of the avengers don’t listen to anyone.”

“I’d listen to what ever you say. If I was part of your team. Do you have to fight often?”

“Not really but we mainly fight with particularly bad villains or intergalactic threats.”

“I’m glad you guys don’t see me as a threat. I promise I don’t want to hurt anyone.”

“I now bud. Now eat up.”

They ate in comfortable silence. Loki was such a good guy. He was quite. But if you put the time in to get to know him than you’d realize what an amazing person he is.

Loki had a few relapses during his time. Bad days where he’d barely speak. Flashback and bad nightmares. But as long as he had someone with him he was fine.

Tony had taken to staying with him during the nights. Thor and Hela went back up to Asgard. They had to prepare for Loki’s return they said. 

Loki’s hair had grown to his neck. They had a few trims in their time here. It would get long and tangled so they would have to cut it. But Loki looked great with the longer hair. His face was perfectly framed by the black hair. 

Loki looked up at tony who looked down with a red face. Loki’s senses were really good. His magic was returning slowly too. So that was a big help to. He could sense things that a human would never be able to. Tony noticed that Loki’s reflexes were incredibly fast. He could catch things that had just fallen like it was no ones business. 

Loki was also incredibly smart. He could solve things that Tony had been working on for days within a few minutes of seeing it. He solved three rubix cubes in the few minutes of using them. Tony had gotten some puzzles and Loki quickly put them together without even looking at the pictures.

Once they finished tony and Loki went to Loki’s room. They sat together watching tv so loki could relax. He would be taking his braces with him. They were tight enough to the leg that he could easily wear pants if he didn’t want someone to see.

Tony helped Loki release the braces so he could slip them off. It was the first time he had to do it. 

Loki had said something about randomly forgetting things people showed him lately. Tony thinks it’s because of the psychological torture he endured. But he wasn’t going to say anything that Loki likely already knows. 

They lay together for a while and Loki falls asleep in Tony’s arms. He’s so beautiful when he’s asleep. That stressed look is gone replaced by calm.

———— 

The two days pass quickly. Tony wants to cry when he realizes he’s going to be all alone again soon. He packs some extra nick back from Loki’s room when they pack. Along with a mechanical disarming key for the braces if they malfunction.

Last but not least Tony gives Loki his bag and gives him a hug.

“Heimdall if you can hear me. Bring me back.” Loki says. This hadn’t worked in the past. Maybe it would work now.

Tony sees a flash of light beam down on the balcony. He watches as Loki is zapped back to Asgard. Leaving him all alone again.


	39. Returning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki returns to Asgard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> second last chapter y'all! Is anyone excited to see the last chapter?

Loki feels the force of the bi- frost. He feels himself ripping through space. Then he’s back. Back on Asgard. 

Magic flushes into him. It’s significantly faster than Midgard. He sees the golden towers. This was his home. But at the same time, was it? He was always different from everyone else. 

He felt like his home was elsewhere. Maybe his home wasn’t a place, but a person. 

He had never felt more safe before. He felt like he could be who he really was without being ridiculed. He had never told anyone but even before he was taken he was regularly called names or put down for his feminine appearance and ways. 

He hadn’t had to deal with that on earth cause there were others like him. Men who preferred to be seen more feminine. 

Heimdall looked down at him. “Welcome back prince Loki. You have been dearly missed.” He said in that familiar voice.

“Just Loki please Heimdall. I am glad to be back.” He says. He still doesn’t really feel like a prince, maybe one day he will.

Thor runs in panting hand bends down slightly to catch his breath. 

“Brother I’m sorry I lost time!” Thor pants out.

“It’s fine brother, I just arrived.” Loki half laughs out. Thor was always a weird case, always running around like a chicken with its head cut off as Tony says. He still doesn’t understand that saying if he’s honest.

“Good, you haven’t been bothering Heimdall as you used to brother have you?” Thor teases gently elbowing him in the ribs.

Loki feels his face heat up looking down.

“It’s alright brother. I jest.” 

Thor spoke so differently than tony, he used to speak like Thor, but he forgot a lot of how the Asgardians spoke and adopted the American dialect.

Together they walked across the rainbow bridge. Rainbow as he had come to know was a symbol for gay pride on earth. He knows Tony identifies with bisexual, something he only very recently realized. Loki himself identifies as asexual. He had learned many of the terms humans used to describe sexuality and gender.

He felt stronger then he was on earth. Almost like his magic was regenerating. It felt good but at the same time overwhelming, he had gone years with almost no magic at all. 

He raised his hand and focused on making one of the first spells he ever learned. It was simple, conjuring a small flame. And though it was still weak like him it was there. That in itself made him smile.

Thor was smiling too. Watching Loki conjuring a small spell. One he had seen numerous times in their youth.   
He is pleased that Loki is already growing stronger.

“I want to take you to mother and father, then to the healers. Tony did a fine job but our healers can heal what humans think to be incurable.” 

“Okay. Are they different?” 

“Mother and father?”

“Yes.”

“Of course, we all are. They never really recovered from your loss, but they’re ecstatic to see you again.”

Loki nods. His heart is beating hard and fast. He isn’t afraid really but he’s changed so much. What if they don’t want him?

What if they don’t let him go anywhere and won’t let him see Tony?

He can’t turn his thoughts off, everything feels like it’s too much. 

When they arrive, Loki comes to a dead stop. His breath picks up and his chest feels tight. 

“It’s okay brother. You are okay. It’s going to be fine.” 

Loki tries to calm himself. He practices the breathing techniques that dr. Jones showed him. And eventually it works. 

He nods to Thor that he’s ready.

They walk to the throne room. The room is brighter than he remembers. It feels almost overwhelmingly bright. 

He shuts his eyes for a moment, trying to block it out.

When he opens them again he’s looking up at a face that he hasn’t seen in over eight years. 

It’s Odin. He drops to his knees. 

“There is no need for that son.” Odin pushes out weakly.

Loki looks up tears streaming down his face. 

Odin stands and makes his way down the steps. Getting to his knees, he wraps his strong arms around Loki’s suddenly weak body. 

“Who did this to you?” Odin whispered into his ear.

That broke Loki. His body shook violently with sobs. He couldn’t tell his father that. He wouldn’t tell anyone that. The only reason he told the two agents was so he could go home.

“Loki I will never let another being near you again.” 

There’s another gasp as someone entered the room.

“Loki?” 

The voice was very familiar, a voice he could never forget.

“Mother?”

She runs over. Collapsing in front of him. Grabbing him in the comforting way she used to. By the cheeks turning his head so he’s looking into her eyes.

“We’ve missed you so much. We thought you dead.”

“I’ve missed you too. I thought I’d never see you again.”

They sat there crying for a few more minutes, than composed themselves as much as possible. 

“I prepared your room brother.” Thor spoke.

Together they walked through the halls Loki hadn’t seen in far too long. Through the halls he could no longer remember.

Soon they appeared in front of a familiar door. His room. His home for so long.

He hesitated but soon reached for the door. It was like opening the box to his old life. To who he was before, and he was honestly more than a little nervous.

He prayed they would let him go if he didn’t want to stay. 

He didn’t think he would. He never did really belong. And as soon as he realized he didn’t belong he knew why he didn’t fit. He was the piece of the puzzle that didn’t fit. But he never would belong to Jotunheim either. Not with his pale skin and small size.

Shutting down his mind and taking a deep breath, he pushed forward into his new life.


	40. the final return

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki goes back to Midgard, for good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is the end, it was a great time for me honestly. I loved writing this and hearing what others had to say and learning about how I can improve my writing. anyhow I was thinking, I know dangerous activity, how about I make this into a series, continuing Loki's story, I won't be able to do it right now as I'm working on another story for a different show. But if yall want it then I'd be down to write more on this. what do you want to see? who do you want Loki to interact with, It's up to you guys?

The next morning he had been confused. How many times had he “woken up” here in this very bed, only for it to be one of Thanos’ tortures. He had stayed in his bed shaking and crying, thinking he was back there. It was only when Thor came to get him and reassured him that this was all real did he start to calm down.

They ate together for the first time in years. They smiled and his mother and father told them of the stories he either couldn’t remember or wasn’t there to remember. They told him of the time they spent searching for him.

After dinner Thor led him to the healers rooms. He hadn’t been there since he was a kid. But now that all his magic was going to healing, he didn’t have the reserves he used to have so he could rapidly heal himself.

They healed what they could, mainly so he could walk normally without the braces, and so he could start to get stronger faster. 

“Do you want us to heal your scars prince Loki?” Eir asked.

“Please, just Loki. and please leave them.” Loki whispered.

“Why? You used to get rid of every imperfection?” she asked.

It was a valid question. And very true. He never wanted scars like the Asgardian warriors he was being trained to be.

“I know. But they tell my story, every scar makes me who I am.” he responded.

It was something Tony told him. During his time there, when he saw his back for the first time and saw the thick scarring. It had stuck with him. It was true.

“That's true. And I believe that your story is an amazing one.”

“Thank you, that means a lot to me.” 

“Your welcome. And i’m done, you should start to see an improvement in your magical reserve soon.” 

“When can I leave?”

“Asgard or here?”

“Both,” 

“Asgard I’d say a week, and here you can leave immediately. Are you thinking of going back to midgard?” 

“Yes, I don’t belong here. I never have, but earth feels like home.”

Eir nods understanding “You will return for visits right?”

“Of course. Asgard is where my family is.” 

He stands to leave and notices how different he feels. He doesn’t feel the aches and pain he did. He was still too small muscle wise but that was always the way on asgard.

He thanks the healer on his way out. 

Loki wants to tell Thor that he doesn’t want to stay on Asgard. but the thought of disappointing him was too much and he backed out.

“Can we go to the garden?” he asked quietly. His stomach churned. Though he knows Thor isn’t going to hurt him he can’t help it.

“Of course, I’ve spent much time there since your disappearance. Mother and I planted your favorite flowers for you when you returned.” 

“You spent time in the garden? You never used to.” 

“It helped when I couldn’t see you, it gave me a small amount of hope.”

“Thinking of you helped me keep fighting.”

They walked together in near silence. The only sound was their shoes hitting the floor.

“You loved him didn’t you? Stark I mean.” Thor whispered.

“Not in the same way he did love me. I loved him in a romantic way. I wanted to sit with him and do normal activities around him. I never felt sexual desires as he does. I haven’t in a long time.” Loki responds.

“They have a term for that on midgard. I remember when stark gave a in depth history lesson when I first returned.” 

“Asexuality, the absence of sexual attraction, before I felt pansexual more than anything. But after everything I don’t think I have the emotional capacity to take part in sexual activities.” Loki explains.

“I love you regardless of who you love and how you love. We all do.” 

“Thank you, that means so much to me. I missed you so much, I never want to miss you again.”

“You won't have to brother, I will fight for you and with you.” 

(1 and a half weeks later)

Loki sat quietly on the bi-frost. He can remember falling vividly even though it never truly happened. Being back brought rise to so many of the visions he saw.

He wishes the thoughts would go away. He wants to relax and feel safe, like he did with Tony. 

He had tried to catch up with his old friends, but they were far too different, now being warriors for asgard. And although they missed him they just didn’t have anything in common anymore, really it couldn’t be helped.

He had put much thought into going back, and now that he was as close as he felt to normal he decided that he would tell Thor that he wanted to go back.

Thor usually came to retrieve him when he wanted to go somewhere because he couldn’t clearly remember where everything was. Everything was fuzzy in his head and he got turned around quickly. 

So he sat and waited, he watched the stars, painting pictures in the stars, connecting the dots. 

“Brother I have come!” Thor bellowed as he ran towards Loki.

Loki stands careful not to lose balance. 

Thor comes to a halt beside him staring out into the stars.

“How do you like it here? I know you used to like it.”

“The stars are wonderful but Thor, this isn’t my home. Not anymore. It hasn’t been for a long time.” Loki says after taking a deep breath.

“Is there somewhere else you want to go?”

Loki knows Thor means one of the realms he was raised on.

“Midgard, I want to go back to Midgard. So I can be with Tony.” 

Thor nods, it's small. But Loki can see it.

“I can have that arranged.” Thor says smiling.

Telling his parents was easier than expected. They said it was fine as long as he made arrangements to return and see them when he could. That was his plan anyways he still wanted to see his family.

(later that day)

Tony had been informed by Thor that Loki was returning so he could be ready.

Loki said a farewell to his family and friends, then making his way to the bi-frost.

The rainbow tunnel opens and he is pushed through. Landing on the balcony of his home.

Tony is in the window, Loki can’t help the giddy smile that spreads over his face upon seeing him.

Loki runs over to Tony and they embrace each other. 

“I love you” they say simultaneously 

His name is Loki, and this is his story. A story he thought to be an end, that really was his beginning.


End file.
